Unmarried, together 10 years, 3 children and OW and I are Pregnant

“Unmarried, together 10 years, 3 children and OW and I are Pregnant”

What brought you to RMI? Please use this space to briefly let our readers know what your life was like when you first found us, Aliyah, so our readers understand just what a miracle your restoration is.

Aliyah, how did your restoration actually begin?

I had been praying to God for a long time to change things in my life. My relationship (I'm not legally married) was not what I’d hoped and I tried to find God's help. Little did I know that it was my fault things were so bad because despite praying, I kept pointing out to God the defects of my companion. I didn’t know how much He wanted me to leave everything for God to take care of.

Attending church all my life, I knew the principles but did not know the need to really let God's transformation take place in me and my relationships. I did a lot by my own strength and I said way too much and I was always very contentious. I wanted my companion to see in me the perfect wife and that he would defend me from the ongoing attacks of his family. His family continued telling him to abandon me and that I was bad for him. We had been together for 10 years and already had 3 children and 2 times we’d been apart but came back together. That's exactly why I sought God this time, so separation would never happen again.

Then in my prayers, I asked God for a total transformation of my companion and that He would put in his heart the desire to marry me but I did not know how much I needed to be the one who needed to be transformed! I had no idea how much I needed to deepen my relationship with my first Love and live as God spoke of in His Word.

Hearing my prayers, God heard me and removed my companion from my life and so immediately I desperately search the internet to get hopes and found the RMI and with all its materials! There were no other ministries that encouraged me since I was not married, so once I read that He would restore me too, I began to apply the principles taught by RMI.

The battle was great for me to go back and try things the same way the first week he packed up and left everything: work, home, children and went to live at his mother's house in another city. I heard later he arranged to meet up with the other woman whom he’d had a child with, a daughter. You can not imagine my despair and even with everything I was facing, I decided to surrender it all to God and trust Him so that my life would be truly transformed, and whether or not there would be restoration I wanted to know Him and be who He designed me to be.

How did God change your situation Aliyah as you sought Him wholeheartedly?

A few months later I heard from friends the OW was pregnant again, so in the eyes of everyone, my situation was beyond hopeless. Yet I continued seeking God and with the help of the free materials from RMI, I saw everything with different eyes and had such a peace beyond the understanding of anyone. I resolved with all my heart to be HIS alone and to believe that what would happen would be for my sake and that I did not need to understand the reasons for the current situation.

The moment I started to apply the principles, the main one, of letting go peace and an understanding began to flood my mind and heart. What God wants you to know, He will show you, after all, nothing is hidden from Him. It was not easy and I made mistakes because sometimes I felt that I needed to listen to other people who wanted to give me advice about my situation, but the moment I would listen to them, my situation would get horribly complicated and I’d lose my peace. Then I realized that things flowed better and in my favor when I just kept silent and praising Him, and it’s when I could see everything with the eyes of the Lord.

What principles, from God's Word (or through our resources), Aliyah, did the Lord teach you during this trial?

In the Word of God, I have learned that I must trust Him with all my heart to trust that all He allows these difficulties because His Love for me is immense and that He wants to be first in my life. With Him, I no longer need to fear anything— after all, whoever follows Him will soon win— one way or another! I discovered that my time in the desert was more because He wanted me for Himself and that He had plans for my life, God wanted me to have a life different from the rest and the way I had been living, which everyone had accepted and even encouraged.

Then one day I received the lesson about the OW was also a victim. So I felt very different, and I realized that in my heart there was no anger or bitterness for her or for my former companion and that when he came to visit, I listen to him about every situation and with all my heart I wanted what he wanted, which was that his son with OW to be healthy, and perfect. Having my companion being with me and our children no longer consumed me, and how God could fix this mess I had no clue. Yet I let it go and simply trusting in His plan to be done.

What were the most difficult times that God helped you through Aliyah?

By attending church, I never had it in my heart the desire to change my situation before God and no one ever spoke or encouraged me to be legally married, never acknowledging that I knew to be living in sin. So I prayed to God and that’s when I read the lesson that we are His church, we needed to be His spotless bride.

I knew that if it was God plan we marry, He would put it in the heart of my former companion. I joined Restoration Fellowship and was rewarded with a huge test. I discovered that my ex-partner had an engagement party for him and the OW—even though they had not even been together a full month. I confess that in despaired I screamed and felt I almost died but God… God moved and I witnessed a miracle. All the people who told me to forget about my relationship, to move on (which I “agreed” with by moving on with the new Man in my life) so many of them came to my house and tell me that I needed to believe much more in Him and that this was not His work and that I had to trust! What a shock.

At last, I did not get lost in the desert, I didn’t wander long. I grabbed the hand of my HH as tightly as I could and discovered that I had to be His Bride in every sense of the word. So each and every day I would wake up renewing my love for Him and asking for more of His presence. He is all I wanted, all I needed and all I wanted. And out of nowhere, I realized that the days came and went without me remembering my situation at all. I did not die of shame because I had Him and His Word was deep in my heart.

Aliyah, what was the “turning point” of your restoration?

The turning point was when I found myself pregnant. I was so far along, almost 7 months when I realized it. I had been so focused on other things I simply didn’t realize it and this baby was so quiet and peaceful I felt no real movement.

We never stopped being intimate because I thought it was alright. Then later when I discovered the truth that I’d been living in sin, I told my companion I could no longer sin against God, which of course only solidified his relationship with the OW. So again, not being intimate meant I couldn’t get pregnant, or so I thought (because it had happened when we were still together). It came out that I was expecting because almost immediately I looked pregnant.

As it said, His plan and His timing are not our own, and this all came out the day of the OW baby shower. Then I got a voice message from my companion. He tried to humiliate me, tried to make me the villain and I remember so well how I felt at the time and I spoke to my Husband. I told Him you see my heart and Yours is the only plan I want. I didn’t get pregnant on purpose, and I know also that having a new child before being married is wrong, but I also know that this has to be Your plan, Lord. I trust You with my whole being and know that I must not worry about anything, You will sustain me and make me victorious anyway you desire. I do not care if I restored or Yours alone. No matter, I am Yours and I accept Your plan for my life and also for this life in me.

Right now, Darling, I do not want to talk, let alone see this man, so sweet Lord, keep him from coming here to see his children, keep him where he is and sustain me emotionally because I do not want him to humiliate me and I want him to feel Your power. I have no idea how I found myself unmarried, together 10 years, with 3 children and both the OW and I am both pregnant but I trust You to unravel this mess.

Tell us HOW it happened Aliyah? Did your husband just walk in the front door? Aliyah, did you suspect or could you tell you were close to being restored?

Well, God heard my prayers and I didn’t hear from my companion. I also began applying the principle of letting go radically and the principle of trusting God to the point that I would not make a move without asking Him what to do next. My life was His alone.

Then one day almost 40 days after I was silent, doorman did not warn me about any visitor when I heard my doorbell ring. So I thought it was a delivery person with the products that I had ordered and when I got to the door, I peered through the peephole in the door and at the same time heard the question, Will you marry me? I was stood there without any reaction unable to open the door. He rang again, repeated what he’d said when I opened the door. I simply looked at him then helped him to put his bags in the house. We sat in silence for a while and he began to talk about our restoration.

That day God moved his things and his heart back home. He remained sleeping with our boys until our ceremony.

During our time of courting, he told me how God had turned his heart that was so distressed by how he was living. The day he came home, he told the other woman that he’d always provide for his children, but he needed to come back and marry me. He got up, packed and dropped everything and knew even without a ring, he had to ask me to get married.

Would you recommend any of our resource in particular that helped you Aliyah?

I recommend everything your ministry offers and to warn everyone to never leave this ministry even after restoration. Because even with him here at home, and us legally married, I realized right away the influence of the enemy in him making him doubt if it is right to be here or if he should spend time with his “other” family. Making him think it's best to go back to OW and be loyal to her. By remaining in the RMI materials, it provides everything you need to instinctively to turn to God in every situation. The principles taught here are so tremendously transformative and lead us to the only One who can and wants to restore our relationships. In moments of conflict, I simply search for prior lessons and always encounter the Word ladened with the promises of God for my situation. Trust your victory will come if you remain here.

Would you be interested in helping encourage other women Aliyah?

Yes

Either way Aliyah, what kind of encouragement would you like to leave women with, in conclusion?

Understand right away that we must trust God, that we should not move to try to change anything because we do not have this power nor do we know His perfect plan. That we should let go radically and seek the Word of God to know that He will do everything for our good.

Dear Brides, if you’ve been thinking you need to stress and worry or carry your own burdens or fix your life you're headed in the wrong direction!! This is not the plan of our Heavenly Husband! He wants us to release every person and situation to Him so He can free us up to ENJOY this abundant LIFE!! He’ll take care of the results and no harm will come to you or those you love. They are His business and all you need to do is put everything in His very capable hands. Free yourself today from any webs that will entangle you and steal your joy!!!

I've loved, loved, loved finding this ministry!!! Being here has given me so much understanding of who I truly am! I am the Lord’s Bride whom He adoringly loves and He spares me from all harm, injustice or shame. I am far from perfect, but yet He cherishes me as I am. No man can do that.

I am a woman who grew up not knowing what love really was. I was hurt by men over and over again. I used to feel that the intimate love I was searching for had to come from an earthly man. Yet after finding the abundant life, I found out this was not true— no one can satisfy me as the Lord does. He truly became my Husband when my earthly partner rejected me and thank God it happened. If you are a woman and feel this way, please read the materials until you too find and begin living the abundant life and discover the Love you’ve always been searching for. Fairy tales do not exist, but the Love of the Man I am speaking of really does!!!