Decided to Trust God

“I Decided to Trust God”

If you knew my husband you would not believe that he is capable of such a sin, that is why I am writing, if it could happen to me (a person who did not have a bad marriage), it could happen to anyone who falls into sin.

My husband got reconnected (through his daughter) to his previous girlfriend in high school—old feelings and wanting "things" to be better for his daughter caused him to fall into a trap.

Yes, he had an affair (it still hurts to say it). All the books that I began reading stated God knows what we can bare and does not allow anything to happen to us that he will not receive Glory for, if we only seek Him. During this time I could not for the life of me figure out what could be HIS plan for my life.

I was so broken and I felt as if I would never be happy again. Even though I did intend to leave, I stayed because my husband assured me that it was me he loved and wanted our marriage to be restored.

Thankfully I knew that if I chose to leave our marriage, it would not miraculously make everything all better. I then decided to not just stay in the marriage, I decided to trust God and praise Him for my situation—even when my flesh fought against it—and, oh boy, did my flesh fight against it!

I instantly became connected with the Lord like I had never been before. In the midst of all the pain and trauma, there were some silver linings that Lord wove in. I sadly had made my husband out to be my god, he was such a good man, when it is the Lord alone who should hold that place! Men are broken vessels, and not meant to be worshiped. The searing pain of betrayal made me finally come loosed from this unhealthy dependency, and that's when He turned my heart in a fresh new way to the Living God.

God taught me forgiveness...I was very active in my church so I wondered how would I be able to teach and preach for that matter about something that I knew nothing about? That's when the Lord reminded me that HE forgave ME in a way that I will never be able to repay. That's how I forgave my husband— in a way that he will never be able to repay.

I can remember climbing in my closet because I felt so alone in the big world. I stayed there and cried out to the Lord. And I believe that God did an instant healing on my mind that day. It was my flesh that fought against it, not my mind or heart. If you knew me, you would say the same thing. Due to having a great deal of anxiety all of my life, I needed to be healed.

At this juncture of my life, I knew I could choose to be unhappy about this matter for the rest of my days and not represent Christ. OR I could choose to follow this Bible verse: “Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended, but this one thing I do, forgetting those things, which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”

Well, unlike most testimonies I've read recently, it was my husband who played a big role in my restoration process. He was able to walk with me while I mourned, hurt, and even was angry. It was my husband who sought God and laid the outcome at His feet. And that's how he began to "win" me all over again. He actually killed me with kindness. We began to pray together for the first time in our marriage! We give God glory each day for what HE was GOING to do even when I did not FEEL it....

~ Tracie in West Virginia, RESTORED

If you're still seeking restoration for your marriage, then this testimony may make you feel a bit jealous until you understand that this is from a wife of one of our Encouraging Men—our Men's Marriage Restoration website. If you notice Tracie never mentioned our books because SHE didn't read them, her husband did.

The reason we are including this testimony in our Encourager and our book, is to help you SEE what is happening on the other side! Exactly what God began to do to Tracie and the role her husband played in her restoration, is how God will work on the other side of your restoration—especially once you make Him first. Find out how.