15 Painful Years

“Remarried Sober after 15 Painful Years”

Winter Turned to Spring the Moment I Met my HH

Dearest Ladies, in the beginning of my journey I felt very uncomfortable talking about the Lord as my Heavenly Husband because of the way I was raised, now He is the only Husband I want:)

I have a very dear friend who experienced a restored marriage “Married after 15 Painful Years” but soon after her husband fell into addiction again and he was not living with them anymore. She was devastated because how could the Lord restore just to take away again? But we prayed and more importantly, she prayed and she grew even closer to the Lord because her finances were now in shambles as well.

But as she grew closer to the Lord, she realized something that gave me goosebumps when we spoke. She told me that the Lord did not take away her EH because of his addiction. The Lord took him away because SHE needed work. She needed to grow in faith, she needed to be the wife He intended for her to be. She told me that when their marriage broke up the first time, she did everything wrong. Here the Lord was giving her chance to do it right with HIM.

And wow, her husband's back and she is even further changed then she was. She can now tell him when he feels down, that the Lord will provide, he need not worry, they will get through it together as a family. She can encourage him and be his helper, like the Lord intended the wife to be. And there is even more.

Last week we had coffee together and as we spoke, we realized that this time in our RJ when we were so broken-hearted was also strangely the happiest times we had. Now that I think about the time after my FH left, I know I am supposed to remember pain, but all I can remember is just His love and His favour on me. I remember the times when He came through for me, the times He healed me from so many emotional scars. The times He protected me from hearing things I was not ready for yet.

I also have to confess that a little over a year now, I have been struggling with the Lord in terms of my restoration. Living the Abundant life with Him is suddenly much more attractive to me than having a restored marriage. I use to say, Lord let Your will be done, but in my heart, I always added: “As long as it is not being restored”. So the day before yesterday when I spoke to my Heavenly Love I told Him, Lord do whatever will give You the most glory. Whether it is having my marriage restored or whether it is showing other ladies that you can live the abundant life without a EH, I will leave it up to You. And this time nothing was added in my heart:) So today I feel so much peace knowing, He will do what He needs to do.

To you new brides and those who are still to have that wonderful encounter with your Heavenly Husband, I want to say, the pain may feel so unbearable now and while you go through life, I am sure you are thinking: “Oh can this pain just go away now, I cannot take it anymore!” Ladies to you I say, take that pain and embrace it, you will feel yourself growing closer to the Lord and when you look back, you will only see His love. Now that I have grown in Him, our love has also grown, but the time He called me out into the desert and wooed me, will always be the best time of my life:):):)

Hosea 2:14 (NIV) “Therefore I am now going to allure her; I will lead her into the wilderness and speak tenderly to her."

Song of Solomon 2:10-11 (NASB) “My beloved responded and said to me, 'Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, And come along. ‘For behold, the winter is past, The rain is over and gone."

I used to think that winter will pass once my EH returned, but I realized winter has turned to Spring the moment I met my HH:)

~ Yvonne in Botswana

RMI African Director