“He Apologized for Everything!”

“He Apologized for Everything!”

Last January, one week after finding out the MRI results that confirmed our daughter had brain damage from seizures at birth, my husband left me. It all started one night when we were meeting my parents for dinner. We had been through a lot last year, a very traumatic delivery that neither of us dealt with. I allowed my in-laws, who became overbearing, to become the focus of our marriage and my misery. We were sitting in the car one night before going in when he made a comment about one of his female co-workers, who I was leary about. I became upset and was short with him that night.

The next night we had to meet his parents for dinner which did not make me happy. I didn't talk much on the way there, and again was contentious and abrupt. The next morning he asked me why I wasn't talking to him. Although everything in me wanted to talk it through with him, I needed to be right and prove my point and didn't respond. He left angry and I called to apologize. He told me he was over this and didn't want to talk to me at all. He had never been so cold or rude to me as that moment. When I tried to talk to him about it, he was so angry. He said he was done dealing with it and had about all he was going to take.

We had a long hurtful talk where he told me he had been thinking of leaving me for a long time. I was shocked and devastated. He went to stay with his parents for the night. He came back the next day, but only spoke to me about our daughter and slept on the couch. This went on for a week. I blew up in anger and hurt and he said he was going to stay with his parents a few days. This turned into six months; six months of the most hurt and pain I had ever felt, but even more than that it was the closest I have ever been to God.

As God led me on my journey, He showed me so many things about myself I didn't like. He showed me things that I needed to let go of in my past - things about my daughter’s delivery and the challenges she still has to face. He showed me how I was allowing others to change me into a person I didn't like. He spoke to me louder than ever and even on my darkest days, and there were many, I knew He told me that He would restore my marriage. I learned how to be still and trust Him.

During my trial, the Lord taught me to be still and know that He is God. He taught me to seek Him first in everything. He taught me how to allow him to heal my hurts. He taught me that nothing is impossible for me as long as I do things through Him. Through this ministry, the Lord showed me how to be the Proverbs 31 woman, which is the kind of woman He intended me to be. I began learning that I do not have to be joyful about my circumstances, but I can be joyful in them.

The most difficult challenge for me was facing divorce, losing my husband and the fear of being a single mom. The courses this ministry allowed me to take gave me such hope during a scary time. God brought this ministry and people into my life just for this trial. Some of the darkest times was having my husband who I thought knew me better than anyone, say such horrible and hurtful things to me. I had to trust who I was in God’s eyes to let that go.

The turning point in my restoration is when I had to let go. When I did, my husband began wanting to spend more time with me and our daughter. One night, out of nowhere, he apologized for everything. He began inviting me and our daughter to do more things with him. One day he told me he was thinking of coming home and asked if I was okay with it. (Of course I was okay with it! :)

For women who are interested in restoring their marriages, I would highly recommend the Bible and all the resources that RMI has to offer, particularly “How God Can and Will Restore Your Marriage” book. This book is the primer for all women going through hard times in their marriages and feel that all hope is dead.

I want to help encourage other women who find themselves in darkness. Even in the darkest day, there is hope in front of you. I have been where you are, cried the tears, felt the pain and all along I could hear God whispering to me even when I didn't believe Him. Lean into Him, be still and know that He is going to restore your marriage and He will show you how. I have tears in my eyes and I'm praying just one person will get some hope from my story.

~ Stephanie in Tennessee

**Read how God continued to Restore Stephanie’s Marriage below:

“Small Gestures”

I want to give praise to God and just share how thankful I am today. As I listened to my local Christian station this morning, they did a segment call Requestiomony where callers request a song and share their testimony on what the song means to them. I started thinking of how this station and this fellowship inspired, encouraged and held me up during my separation from my EH. I started thinking about how the smallest gestures can change someone’s day or even life. A verse, a song, or a ministry like this. My husband moved home at the end of July after a six-month separation. It wasn’t a romantic homecoming like I imagined or you see in movies, but it was perfect. Since he has been home, things have been good. I continue to seek God everyday in my marriage, for my marriage and even before I speak to my EH. He gave me his wedding ring to put in a safe place but did not put it on when he came home. I must admit, this killed me and in many ways I think the enemy tried to use this to test and defeat me. But from this ministry, I learned to stay silent and pray about it. Last night out of the blue, he asked where I put his ring because he wanted to put it back on! I cannot tell you how this small gesture just made my night! I cried tears of joy and I'm so thankful this morning. I just feel led to share encouragement with others that everything DOES work together for good. There is HOPE in front of you. Seek God and do not give up. When God places something in your heart, do it, seek Him and believe Him. You never know how the smallest gestures can be reaffirming to someone and can show them that God is real. He does care about each and everyone one of us. He knows your name, He knows what you are going through and you WILL get through this. Be Encouraged!

~ Stephanie in Tennessee