/une chanson occitane, CasaDeBalneario

To feel better - take one cup of ghee, 1 cup of whole grain flour, 1 cup of sugar, and 3 cups of water. Prepare Karah Parshad, pray, make an offering, share with others. 

I always assosiated Barcelona with its great Sikh community. I like spending time in Gurdwara, humble, grateful, listening, eating, drinking divine chai. I guess Sikhs has it pretty well thought - Sewa is serving both sides - trying to help others, You're mainly helping yourself; and that's fine. 

Alternatively - prepare yourself a salad you like, go to Park de la Ciutadella, eat it in the sun, and have a nap. Do yoga, stretch, read a book, call someone. Listen to parrots for a fair amount of time. If You prefer, go listen to this man who plays kora. Continue until it works, or until it's getting cold. 

You can also go to Nocturna Discordia concert. It seems to be working :)

/Robert, Sikh Gurdwara, Soda Acústic

this week i had my birthday, and covid again destroyed my plans. but still, it was warm, sunny, we had a lovely finale of Rutas Invisible group, after which we were invited to eat in Mescla Dis together. good day, after all.

what I've learned this week is that children in Spain have Ratoncito Perez, not a Tooth Fairy. he lives in a casita.

(“It takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place. If you want to get somewhere else, you must run at least twice as fast as that!”)

/Alice in the Wonderland, illustration by Sir John Tenniel

it is a week of maps, everyone is in movement. on Valentine's Day my boyfriend came to visit me :) i had an online 4-day-long On Arrival Training that I enjoyed a lot. i've met great people, coming from all over the world, who i hope to see face-to-face soon. Isa, the other ESC volunteer I'm working with, is finishing her project and going back home on Sunday. przywitania i pożegnania, holas and adios, hellos and goodbyes.

/Samuel Beckett

it's hard to write about anything else then about what's happening in Ukraine now. it's hard to think, read, listen, watch, speak, worry about anything else. for last two weeks I had covid and I had to isolate myself in my room, with many dark thoughts locked there with me. I hope it's all going to be better, soon. 

/@pogotowie_graficzne,  @giacomo_taborecci, @agasrokosz, @adela_madej, Nina Gregier, Karolina Kruk, Wiktor Pilipczuk (aka OBIEKTOR)

so when you're weak, hang yourself on your skeleton, make your body hang on bones. it may be a cage, but feel how safe it is, how it tries to move according to your needs. i'm grateful for that refined beauty. i remember exactly the day when i realised that i'm already made - that my skeleton has finished growing, that this is my form. that my palms embody their design.

and inside, protected, all the soft parts are hanging, they're sliding, pushing through, shoving on, hugging. your voice has it's home there, and it's a cathedral. your womb has it's chamber. one day, maybe, those bones will stretch to make a passage for someone new.

/ Tabu Rojo, Convent de Sant Augusti; https://giphy.com/marcrodriguez

everything's complicated enough, mixed enough - the pression of going back is going to hit me soon - but also the excitement. i'm finishing my businesses here,  i've learned enough. there is always some fear of leaving and some fear of going back. the world was moving, she was right there with it and she was!

/ Talking Heads, La Lokomotiva

so, the journey slowly comes to it's end. soon i'll be riding my bike with my dog next to my river in the spring. i'll be sleeping in my bed with my man in my sheets. having picnics with my friends, singing with my bands. all the perception of safety is always fleeting, impermanent, fragile, apparent, nevertheless delicious. such as danger. nothing is really happening and nothing will ever happen until the end. the harder you hit, the deeper the dent; the longer you live, the higher the rent. 

this being said, i have lots of hope. i'm so happy that there is still so much beauty. in the nullifying, defeating, negating, repeating joy of life.

In that high sun, after our good run

When the spirit bends

Beneath knowing it must end

And that is all I want here

To draw my gaunt spirit to bow

Beneath what I am allowed

Beneath what I am allowed

/ Joanna Newsom, Michał Zabłocki, Grzegorz Turnau, podróże.

I'm going to leave Barcelona soon. Everything seems so luscious here - architecture, birds, plants. One can already feels the the summer underlaying the spring. 

In Poland przedwiośnie is so much different, it's winter lightly mixed with spring, still cold, grey, modest, austere. It keeps You waiting so long for the spring to happen, and it arrives just when You're losing hope for it. You're never sure. You don't expect too much, prepared for a new gust of cold wind whipping your face. And when the spring arrives, you're already offended for her putting You to a test. And you're already exhausted by remaining in love with her when she finally enfolds. Happiness of my people is born old. And it is followed by hard work rather then celebration.

Here everything is filled with promises overflowing. I'm bathing in them, absorbing, and they're tickling and tingling. I'm very grateful for it. 

<3 

/wiosna