I found myself pondering every morning, stuck as if my world was painted in black and gray. A dull melancholic world I saw; I had no interest in it at all so you can imagine the dread I had getting out of bed. It probably used to take me a good 20 minutes to get out of bed. For you it might have been a simple roll out of bed moment , but for me it was a moment I despised and chose to go without a couple days out of the week. Getting out of bed was so dreadful I felt sluggish as if I was pulling the weight of a 200 lbs man behind me as I got up. This was every day, the same draining cycle.
Eventually I grew tired of this abyss.
I began to ask myself but what is it that I hate about it? What aspect about it makes me hate it so much? Is it just simply starting my day that I hate? But who am I to be so ungrateful, I began to take into account everything I have in my life. Even the little things I didn't notice before I started to be grateful for. It was the moment I stopped being so blind to everything I have in my life. I was dreading waking up as if I didn't have a school to go to, clothes on my back, food on the table, a roof over my head, I even had a job. I had everything I needed and more, but I failed to see everything I was blessed with because of my pessimistic attitude. The blindfold I was wearing was quickly taken off when I took in account every child who was less fortunate than me and just began to feel ashamed for myself because they were children I saw on the new less fortunate then I enjoying life with the things they had because even though they had very little that didn't kill their joy. This sparked a light inside me like a fire almost.
This fire awoke in me like the first fire that man saw, it roared. This drive I found within myself felt like I had just given my car a full tank of gas after running it on empty. My whole perspective on life shifted I was hungry now, ready for life, I took this as a challenge to live everyday thankful for everything I have with a will that kept me pushing for success, I was no longer dreadful and stuck I was ready to take on the world head on.I saw life as a blank canvas I was the bristle holding the paint ready for my solo dance. This new hunger motivated to be the best and do my best, I would live everyday thankful for everything I had, I even became more independent not to long after this new hunger for success grew, I began to train at the gym I actually wanted to start the day.I was proud of myself I went from seeing the world in black and white to painting it in beautiful pastel. I was prepared for days where maybe the world was hard but my hunger was ready to push me though I outgrew that box of negativity I fought so hard to get out of .Another way to put it is I went from seeing my cup as half empty to seeing it as half full. I no longer was an enemy or menace to my success.
The importance of mindset became so clear to me, think black and white and you will see the world in black in white. Think bright and positive and you will see the beauty in everything. Think poorly and you'll find yourself in a pool of doubt. I analyzed my past mindset so that I could avoid falling in that toxic cycle again. I realized that the way you think, even the way you speak to yourself is not to be taken lightly. The power your subconscious holds is immense, it's like a pen that never stops writing good or bad.
Even my internal dialogue began to change once I learned the power of thought I wasn't only training in the gym i was growing and training mentally as well. I was reading a book at the time called The Genius Frequency by John F. Fallon, which touches on genius level thinking as being a mindset attainable to all. It is only yourself who will limit your own potential. I literally had to reteach myself how to think more positively, doing so would affect my actions as well. Believe it or not your subconscious mind picks up on everything so just imagine what those negative thoughts I was having ,and how they were influencing me. As I changed my way of thinking I also had moments where I would catch myself thinking negatively and I would simply correct myself, that moment I failed to do before which caused me to be stuck in that pessimistic mindset I was in. But I was strong enough to catch this toxic trait and nip it in the bud. I’m glad i was able to step away and really look and realize how the way of thinking completely effects your mindset and view on the world. I like to think of my mindset as what I like to call the million dollar women mindset.
I choose this piece of writing because it truly describes my inner drive, and describes how i grew mentally .It is also a great personal piece that represents my drive and self awareness. I choose my mind map to accompany this piece of writing because it shows a artistic way of viewing my character giving readers a visual representation and literary understanding of my character.
I liked the similes used in this piece, it helps visualize the thoughts that the author is talking about. Not only that, but it helps understand the emotions that they are feeling and their mindset and how it was affecting their life.
--Talia Armijo
I find it sort of astonishing how alike this generation is, after reading Diana's memoir some of my friends started to pop in my mind, since many think alike, that we really do have the power to choose how every day of our lives go based on our mindset and the ability and willingness to not let negative thoughts affect the way we perceive the world and our success. I'm glad you were able to push through and were able to put it into such a descriptive piece that could possibly help and encourage others.
--Sara Lopez
After reading this memoir I could relate so much because I know that feeling of not wanting to get out of bed and do day to day daily basis things. I have struggled with anxiety and depression. I think it made a big impact on my mindset but lately i have chosen to look on the bright side and not give up on myself. Just because I am going through a difficult time does not give me an excuse or reason to not continue and stay stuck in one endless sad "toxic cycle". I believe that even when times are hard you may feel alone but someone out there is going through something way worse but they chose to be positive and see the good I think that type of mindset is inspiring because many people take what they have for granted.
--Gaby Cervantes