When the long weekend comes along,
We do our best to get away…
Some new big adventure,
To brighten up our day...
Well, we decided to go camping,
So we booked a place that's not too far…
To accommodate the six of us,
Two dogs and all our cars...
Upon our arrival,
We were surprised at what we saw...
Bloody people everywhere,
For at least a mile or more...
This wasn't camping,
Too many people in one place...
How could you enjoy this,
With your neighbour in your face...
So we left that crowded camp,
In search of something new...
There wasn't a lot to pick from,
The options were so few...
We drove around for hours,
Looking far and wide....
Through the valleys and the hills,
For somewhere to reside...
Then down a winding road,
We found the perfect spot,
A secluded piece of paradise,
Our private little plot…
Now the boys had roof top tents,
They had them set up within the hour...
They just looked so damn good,
They even had a shower...
Meanwhile we unpacked our dome tent,
Chose a nice place by a tree...
As we prepared to erect the thing,
Just the wife and me...
What a flamin nightmare,
Nothing was going right...
We had too many poles,
This was going take all bloody night...
It was the tent from hell,
Nothing was as it seems…
There was a flurry of loud swearing,
Amongst the mournful screams…
This proved be very popular,
With our fellow camping crew…
They watched on in fits of laughter,
At the tantrums that we threw…
Then a couple hours later,
We had gained the upper hand,
There was no turning back,
It was time to make a stand…
Well it finally went together,
It was a vision to behold…
This polyester palace,
With its domes of green and gold…
We stood there proudly by its side,
A little worse for wear…
Just a bit red faced,
With our matted looking hair…
Then I had a quiet thought,
As my wife turned and walked away…
When this camping trip is over,
That tent is going on eBay…
Len Newey October 2016