Sunday Family Humour 1st November

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

Thoughtful Nuggets

Thanks to Bill S

If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the famous erudite scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates."

His mind sees things differently than most of us do. . .. here are some of his gems:

1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.

3 - Half the people you know are below average.

4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.

7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

8 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.

9 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.

10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ...... But she left me before we met.

12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?

13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.

19 - I intend to live forever... So far, so good.

20 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."

24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name.

25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

26 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.

33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.

34 - If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

And the all-time favorite -

35 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?

Repartee At Its Finest

Thanks to David M.

Repartee At Its Finest

Gallery

Thanks To David M and Others

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What a Wonderful World

Thanks to Wally

Geyser in Nevada

Thanks to David M.

In the early twentieth that a well needed to be dug to bring water and nutrients to the soil above. He lived in a barren desert and the water stored deep beneath the Earth’s crust would have provided a more sustainable crop for this harsh and dry area.

He knew that a well with ample water was needed to supply bountiful crops. What he didn’t know was what was waiting for him deep below the soil. He began to dig a deep well when problems soon arose. After digging deep into the Earth searching for water, he found what he was looking for.

The problem was that the water was incredibly hot. Over 200 degrees in fact, making it impossible to create a well at the time. He capped off his ventures

and was forced to forget about supplying the area with a sustainable water source.

A team came to the area with better drilling technology in 1964, in order to create a successful well. Their plans didn’t go as expected as the water was still too hot for them to deal with. The drilling operation was immediately suspended and abandoned.

The team that came in 1964 didn’t cap their drilling ventures properly and they created a small geyser. Under extreme pressure and at extreme temperatures, gasses, water, minerals, and nutrients flooded to the surface. This small geyser has grown at an incredible rate creating something that nobody expected.

It is not a typical geyser at all. This type of geyser is actually called a fly geyser and it pumps the nutrient rich water above ground where these nutrients and minerals have collected, creating a colorful mountain that continues to grow to this day.

The fly geyser in Nevada started out as an attempt to create a well but the drillers got much more than they bargained for when they were faced with scolding hot water. After the operations were abandoned, a beautiful monument created by nature was formed and it has taken on a life of its own, continuously growing and changing. The mineral rich water has created a mountain of colorful formations that have stunned the world.

The fly geyser in Nevada has created its own unique ecosystem in and around the water.

If you get close enough you’re able to see small fish swimming in the hot spring waters and many birds flying around feeding on the organisms that have come to call this magical fantasy land, home.

The different nutrients, gasses, and minerals that are expelled from this fly geyser in Nevada react differently to the sun, as well as the oxygen in the air. This reaction creates some magnificent colors that are constantly changing. The longer this geyser flows, the more beautiful it becomes. Look out Yellowstone. It looks like you have some serious competition in Nevada.

They have refused all offers and keep their property fenced in to prevent the hordes of people that flock to this area to see the geyser from ruining their land. Few people, family and friends, even a few photographers have been allowed access but this is someone’s land. I can understand the owners not wanting too many strangers trampling the beautiful rural area.

The land owners will give you a guided tour if you can get a hold of them. The price varies on their mood and the time of year, so if you want to make plans to see this place you better be nice to the owner and his family.

The fly geyser in Nevada is located on private land so you would need permission to see the rare sight. Many people have contacted the land owners with offers to purchase the land in order to transform this desert oasis into a tourist attraction. The land owners have no intent of letting that happen. This is their own private oasis and they are happy with keeping it that way.