Sunday Family Humour 12th April Page 2

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

Senior Computer Skills

Thanks to David M.

Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?

Customer: A white one...

Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.

Customer: Your left or my left?

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Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'can’t find printer’.

I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it..

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Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.

Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?

Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.

Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.

Customer: OK

Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?

Customer: Yes

Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in.

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Customer: I can't get on the Internet.

Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?

Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?

Customer: Five dots.

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Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?

Customer: Netscape.

Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.

Customer: Oh, sorry... Internet Explorer..

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Customer: I have a huge problem.

A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

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Tech support: How may I help you?

Customer: I'm writing my first email.

Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?

Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the little circle around it?

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This one and the next are our personal favorites!

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.

Tech support: Are you running it under windows?

Customer: 'No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point.

The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine.'

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And last but not least!

Tech support: 'Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time.

That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the Program Manager.'

Customer: I don't have a P.

Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.

Customer: What do you mean?

Tech support: 'P'.....on your keyboard, Bob.

Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT

Lightening

Thanks to Lee

Lightning

Incredible - Man made

Thanks to Lee

Manmade

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Advice and Hopes

Thanks to Francois

Your Turn To Change The Light Bulb

Thanks to David M.

The Cicret Bracelet

Like a Tablet, but on your skin.

Thanks to Lee

$3.99 Special

Thanks to Murray S.

I love it! If you are a senior you will understand this one, if you deal with seniors, this should help you understand them a little better, and if you are not a senior yet, God willing... someday youwill be.

The 3.99 Special

We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the 'seniors' special' was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $3.99.

'Sounds good,' my wife said, 'But I don't want the eggs.'

'Then, I'll have to charge you $5.49 because you're ordering a la carte,' the waitress warned her.

'You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?' my wife asked incredulously.

'YES!' stated the waitress.

'I'll take the special then,' my wife said.

'How do you want your eggs?' the waitress asked.

'Raw and in the shell,' my wife replied.

She took the two eggs home and baked a cake.

DON'T MESS WITH SENIORS! WE'VE been around the block morethan once!

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