Husbands

Husbands

Introduction

A. Ephesians 5:22-24 Husbands in some ways mirror the role of Christ:

1. Christ is Prophet, Priest, and King

2. Husband must serve in similar as the

a. Instructing prophet, Ephesians 5:26 sanctify and cleanse her with the Word

b. Praying and interceding priest, 1 Peter 3:7 prayers not be hindered

c. Providing and protecting king or lord of the house. Eph.5:25 gave Himself for her, nourishes and cherishes her as the Lord the church

B. We seem to come up short for lists to describe what husbands must.

1. Titus 2 is great for wives, but what about husbands? ... "self-controlled"??? is that all?

2. No list in Titus 2 because there is already a list in Titus 1

I. What our sons should become and our daughters should marry...Titus 1

A. To set the church in order (1:5), where would Titus look for elders?

1. Cretan Theological Seminary? None for centuries

2. Personal training program designed by Paul or others? None that we know of

3. Looked in the homes and families. Men who do marriage and family correctly. The way he governs family.

4. Why? v. 10 had to defend against those who subvert whole households with false doctrine.

5. Elders must model 1 Peter 5:3 the virtues the Gospel teaches.

-- godly family, godly character, defend sound doctrine

B. Every characteristic of elders is applicable to all men.

1. Therefore is what we want to instill in our sons and demand in the men who would court our daughters.

2. Clergy and Laity distinctions suggest different standards for elders or preachers. We know that they fall short of perfection, so what are we to do? Discount the characteristics and lower the standards? or lift up all men to reach toward these qualities.

3. Which one of these qualities are you willing to pass over for your sons or the suitors for your daughters?

II. The list, verses 6-10

A. Above reproach

1. Not sinless perfection, 1 John 1:7-9. Claim of sinlessness is a lie

2. Above reproach speaks of reality that the evil-doers will throw accusations at him. They must not stick! It may give some pause, but they will just shake their heads and say, "That is ridiculous."

B. Husband of one wife, read that "one-woman-man"

1. Not just that he has stayed married to one wife who has put with him and his numerous and shameful trysts with other women. Loyal and faithful to one woman.

2. Not just a statement of legal status but of character. Not flirtatious looking at (Matthew 5 lust in the heart) and longing for other women. Someone who you cannot trust with other women young or old. A womanizer we say.

C. Children not charged with debauchery or insubordination.

1. Lucky dads? Had the good luck to have birthed well behaved kids?

2. Implication is that he has raised the thus, "faithful" not just "believers."

-- "believers" implies that are old enough to have obeyed the Gospel

-- what if he has more children? disqualified?

-- point again is not the legal status of the children but their "faithfulness" or orderliness

3. Sinless children? No -- fact is all children are disobedient.

-- by the time they are able to walk, every child is a "viper in a diaper"

-- Father is unqualified if his son typically insubordinate and rebellious or worldly. When he does something wrong or embarrassing, folks say, "There he goes again." That is Who He IS!

-- Father is qualified if his son is not usually in trouble. When he does something wrong or embarrassing, folks say, "We better pray that he doesn't get killed when he gets home to face his dad."

4. What kind of a model would an elder be if he had children that never needed correction? He must be a model of a father who faithfully corrects his children.

D. Character, v. 7 -- Is this man qualified to marry my daughter?

1. Not self-willed, not quick-tempered, not given to wine, not violent, not greedy for money.

2. Would you want your daughter to marry such a man?

a. Self-willed: self-absorbed tyrant, childishly unfeeling toward the wants and needs of others?

b. Quick-tempered: easily provoked into fighting with the wife and children. Prone to be abusive both in word and deed. Quickly out of control for whatever reason.

c. Drunk on occasion: Given to wine usually anticipates all of the excesses that result from diminished judgment, such as infidelity, squandering the family resources, brawling, mistreatment of the wife and children when out of his mind.

d. Violent: Just in case you did not get the possible results of being quick-tempered and drunk on occasion. Worldly men are violent from time to time when they are out of control.

e. Greedy for money: Goes along with being self-willed. Is this the kind of man you want your son to be or your son-in-law?

3. Character of every Christian man rather should be ... to bear the fruit of the Spirit.

a. Hospitable

b. Lover of what is good,

c. Sober-minded, just, holy, self-controlled

E. v. 9 Doctrinally, not just for preachers and elders, but for all men

1. Holding fast the faithful word -- you see that first modeled in the home setting

2. That he may be able, by sound doctrine, both to exhort and convict those who contradict.

3. This is the ideal that every young man and every father, must aspire to. Take the lead as God's man and as God's leaders in the church.

4. He is going to disciple my grandchildren! My sons and sons-in-law! To carry on the heritage that I am giving my children.

-- Ephesians 6:4 Nurture and Admonition of the Lord

5. Jude 1-3 Who? Christians (called, sanctified, preserved in Jesus Christ) must contend earnestly for the faith delivered to the saints (not seminaries)