Sunday Family Humour 27th February Page 2

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

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A Long Flight

Thanks to Bill S.

A lawyer and an elderly man are sitting next to each other on a long flight.

The lawyer is thinking that old guys are so dumb that he could get over on them easily.

So the lawyer asks the old man if he would like to play a fun game.

The old man is tired and just wants to take a nap,

so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks.

The lawyer persists and says that the game is a lot of fun.

"I ask you a question and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5.

You ask me a question and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500." he says.

This catches the man's attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.

The lawyer asks the first question.

"What's the distance from the Earth to the Moon?"

The elderly man doesn't say a word, reaches in his pocket,

pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the lawyer.

Now it's the old man's turn. He asks the lawyer,

"What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down hill with four?"

The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all references he could find on the Net.

He sends emails to all the smart friends he knows, all to no avail.

After one hour of searching, he finally gives up.

He wakes up the old man and hands him $500.

The old guy pockets the $500 and goes back to sleep.

The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer.

He wakes up the elderly man and asks,

"Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?"

The man shrugs, reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep.

Peru

Thanks to Paul S.

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Signs for Modern Woman

Thanks to Paul S.

The Wheelclamp

Thanks to Peter D.

Nature Pictures

Thanks to Ray O'.

Look at dots on Dam wall

Diga del Cingino Dam, Italy

This is the Diga del Cingino dam in Italy -

but look closer... see spots on the dam wall?

They are European Ibex and they like to eat the moss and lichen & lick the salt off the dam wall

Indian Spirituality

Thanks to David H.

National Health Service (NHS) Reforms

Thanks to Peter D.

Proposed cuts to the National Health Service.

The British Medical Association has weighed in on the new Prime Minister David Cameron's health care proposals.

The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The Gastroenterologists had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but the neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.

The Obstetricians felt they were all labouring under a misconception.

Ophthalmologists considered the idea short-sighted.

Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while the Paediatricians said, "Oh, Grow up!"

The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the Radiologists could see right through it.

The Surgeons were fed up with the cuts and decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.

The ENT specialists didn't swallow it, and just wouldn’t hear of it.

The Pharmacologists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow, and the Plastic Surgeons said, "This puts a whole new face on the matter...."

The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.

The Anaesthetists thought the whole idea was a gas, but the Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.

In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the arseholes in London .

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