A Parking Lot for Unsorted Ideas and Notes
To Do for Preparation
( x ) Send email
Links to this page. https://sites.google.com/site/empathycodesign/workshops/2015-07-22
Have ear buds main technical problem is getting audio feedback.
Link to empathic listening. Download and print Empathic listening guide.
Printable PDF: How-To Do Empathic Listening. http://j.mp/1GHmIyr
Notice, Hangout is being recorded for documentation, education and promotion purposes.
We can go back and get transcripts for the design work.
Create a separate document with pictures.
Empathy Circle: This is our Prototype
Intention and Candle
Self-connection
Active Listening
Mirrored feelings and motion
End: Blow candle and intention out into the world.
IDEO Course: Participation Agreement:
Develop a clear participation agreement:
People sometimes sign up for the course and then after awhile don't show up.
This has a negative effect on the team when someone withdraws.
Also it takes a space that could have been given to another person.
Have potential participants sign an confirmation to stay with the course.
I know I am taking a space that someone else could have had and dropping out impacts the rest of the team.
Design Age specific Empathy Circles
0-1
1-2
Hold empathy circles around the world in interesting places. This to make them more interesting.
on top of mountains
in a hot springs
????
How might we keep people engaged in the empathy work after we have done a mini design project?
send out an email to ask people
do a design project around that.
have it be part of a larger empathy cause.
have a clear next step - another workshop or series.
have a financial motivation, ie. can become a trainer.
Designing and voting on Empathy Circle Launch Question.
Create Empathy Circles and Empathic Design workshops for specific topics
Empathy and the arts
empathy and psychopathy
empathy and pathologies
all kinds of specific problem areas
various projects and needs
Celebrating failures
Explain how each part of the workshop supports the benefits of empathy.
Empathy Circle
Well-being - when we connect, if fosters belonging, validation, community. Share joys, sorrows the full spectrum of experience need for well being.
Personal Healing - Listening is the core of therapy, but with a professional therapist listening to the client. This is a mutual and reciprocal empathic healing of equals.
Interpersonal Conflict Resolution - core of conflict resolution is empathic dialog and understanding. This circle can hold most any conflict and resolve it.
Empathic Team Building - build trust in teams, where everyone feels they will be heard and create a foundation for collaboration. Teams can be family, community, work, design teams, etc.
Learning and a Way of Knowing - it is a practice
An Empathy Practice - like mediation, yoga, exercise, - this process exercises and builds the empathy muscles. Over time, you get better and better at it.
Empathic Design
Creativity and Action. This process translates empathy into connection, understanding, problems and needs finding, creative solutions finding and innovation. As well as an ongoing iterative, cyclical process.
What we are doing today is a most basic introduction to both of these processes.
Create an outline of what processes can be added to the basic empathy circle.
reflection
paraphrase
summarize
reflect meaning
feelings
needs
speak from feeling
role playing
mediation
Lay out all the personal frustrations people have with just doing empathic listening.
The whole point of this process is to get exercise and practice with empathic listening.
this is a lot of material, it may feel overwhelming, disorienting at times. that is normal. We will do a few times and it will get easier each time around.
Creating an deeper scene of presence and connection in the Empathy Circle.
Our intention is to create a deeper scene of care and presence in the circle. We need good preparation and to create a smooth experience without jarring technical problems. Technical hiccups can get in the way. These include people moving around trying to find a better place. Noise, coming late
have a you will have a much better experience.
have a quiet space. no interruptions.
Smart phones, Ipads, tablets do not work. they may have
we need to work on a shared Google document, .
How might we create more sustained and iterative engagement in the Empathic Design Workshops?
Have a repeatable involvement. Participants now come for one workshop and do not return. How to encourage participants to return for multiple iterations?
How might we transition at the end of the Empathic Design workshop to creating and implementing a new prototype and then testing it?
* you will be asked to take notes and write in a google document. We will take short transcripts when we interview each other. * Recommend you have a solid table or desk to place the computer, moving around a lot can be dizzying for other participants to watch.
* Have quite space. A cafe or distracting and busy noisy area does not work. The microphone picks up the noise and it can be distracting to participants.
Why Recording of the Empathic Design Workshops and make it available on the YouTube?
Few if anyone will watch because.
people can learn about how the process works.
We can go back and transcribe word for word.
it's easy and doesn't cost anything
Openness and transparency leads to more empathy.
What objections do people have to being publicly recorded?
it makes them feel self conscious and can not express themselves as freely, especially when dealing with deep issues.
It may be on the internet for ever
needs for safety and security
=========================================================
=========================================================
Notes to sort on Empathic Listening
We are building the empathic container. We want to make it stronger and stronger. On this basic foundation we can add more and more layers and make the container even better.
Doing empathic listening is like doing scales when learning an instrument. It helps you as a foundation for playing music and for creating a symphony.
It's a drill, we are exercising the empathy muscles, we lift the weights over and over again and slowly the muscles get stronger. The brain starts to rewire itself and those empathic neural pathways wire together and become more automatic.
It builds resilience. Being heard over and over again fills the emotional empathy tank so when we go into difficult situations we have a full tank of energy.
The intention is meaning, in time the reflection can drop away, but it is there to drop back into.
people may feel it is weird or boring.
I have done it at the empathy tent and seen many different reactions, really enjoy the energy of the people willing to do it.
it is not always fun. It can be very hard,
It is not about peak experiences, Many people rush from one workshop to the other seeking peak experiences. This is not for you. This is for the long term.
it's a foundational practice
may feel awkward
it does create safety
I can offer support to you in a one on one listening
it may not feel empathic to begin with.
it is mechanical
it is parroting: it is up to the listener if they feel hear. if they feel heard with direct ‘parroting’, then that is what counts. If they do not feel hear, it is their responsibility to keep speaking until they feel heard the way they want to be heard.
Needs that the circle addresses
Empathy - need an empathic way of being and container
Safety - need a safe container which is not competitive or dominating. I need a sense of safety.
Fairness - everyone has a turn
Being fully hear -
Effectiveness -
Some principles of Empathy Circles
Turn taking: everyone has a turn
Have full attention until you feel fully heard
Can feel heard to your satisfaction
Multiple perspectives. you have multiple people that can hear you which gives a richness of reflections and emotional feedback
Some of the dynamics I've seen
Lawyers, want to ask questions and control with asking questions
I have a lot of important stuff to say and I want to say it right away or I will forget it.
Advice givers, I have important advice to give and I want to say it now
all of this is 'allow' when it is your turn, but empathy takes precedence over other quality.
The person is reflecting but doesn't really listen. I really don't feel heard
nothing really changed
empathic listening is not an end all
not everyone wants to do empathic listening.
This is boring
Notes
What I am doing is creating a spectrum of empathic listening
we need to put in our 100 hours.
Here is the mediation of my family, We now us this process in our family and it has been very effective.
(example article)
After spending 8 intense years studying empathy from every angle.
It has become clear to me that this is the process that I will be building on.
One people
There is a scale of people form
Very accepting of empathic listening..................to................ No Way
There is a lot of room for growth and development in this process.
What I have to offer in the foundation of empathic listening, the combination of various empathy building processes,
The Challenge will be;
How might we redesign the listening process to create a more empathic experience?
It should lead to constant redesign to address our common needs.
It will merge empathic listening,
Also, I'm interested in transformational empathy not transactional..
it's about
Edwin: I also find it support my own sense of safety.
We will do this as a prototype at the next meeting and see how it goes.
In the circle, How do you pass your turn if you don't want to speak or be heard.
I speak to someone and say,
I have nothing to say,
I don't want to speak
You will get a reflection and you can say you are heard, and your turn will be over.
What are some benefits of the process
Create
a Mission
vision
guidelines - policy and procedures
evaluations
How Teams Can Work Together
'Overwhelming to think of how we might all work together.'
- one way is that all our work is documented on the site so we can see and build on each others interviews, research, ec.
see the sub pages here for example.
https://sites.google.com/site/empathycodesign/participants
I put together all the intentions here
https://sites.google.com/site/empathycodesign/sort/intentions
interview questions
https://sites.google.com/site/empathycodesign/sort/interview-questions
- yes, cross team research interviews would be interesting.
and maybe a team of two cross team members could lead a mini design workshop with new 2 or 3 guests.
Design 3 Questions for the first 3 workshops.
for me, I still have questions about the best topics to explore in the first 3 meetings for maximum effectiveness. Ideas,
1. is to go deeper into everyone's intentions.. you had ideas about this,
2. I'd like to know the deepest '5 Whys?' people value empathy.
3. something about goals..
Meeting 1: Design Challenge:
Meeting 1: What is your intention (goal)?
Listening:
Interview: what is your intention for the course?
assignment?
Meeting 2: Why is empathy important to you?
Listening:
Interview: Why is empathy important to you?
assignment?
Meeting 3:
Listening:
Interview:
assignment?
Team Assignment: Facilitate a Simple Empathy Circle
Questions
I also don't know if we are to bring some ”homework” for this Wednesday. I've been practicing empathy circles with my family, but apart from that, I don't recall talking about something specific.'
And, in your message below, you remind us to write a report for next time. Could you please tell me more about the report? How long? What are the objectives/criteria?
Team Assignment:
Begin holding some empathy circles with family, friends, etc.
so that is great you are doing it with family. The 'empathy circle' process is our prototype and we want to begin doing some simple tests of it at home.
I created an area on our website where we can post the research.
http://sites.google.com/site/empathycodesign/research
begin with simple notes about your experience.
You can ask participants about their experience as well. here is one I did. I might do a couple more this week as well. let me know what you think.
https://sites.google.com/site/empathycodesign/research/edwin
Each person took on the assignment of leading an empathy circle test this week
I was thinking we could do 5 minutes reports with empathic listening. ie. everyone can write up a short report of the experience and share for up to 5 minutes at the beginning of the next meeting. It's just to get a jump on the research we will be doing in more depth after next week.
Objectives:
Begin getting experience in leading and testing the empathy circle process in your environment. (home, friends, work, school, community)
Have 1 to 4 fellow participants.
Test the empathy circle as a prototype
Find out participants experience.
Document your experience facilitating an empathy circle.
We will post the reports to this research folder.