Sunday Family Humour 21st February 2010 Page 2

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

A very special thank you to all contributors.

Page 1 a href="https://sites.google.com/site/humourtoo/sunday-humour-21st-february-2010/sh-21-feb-p2" target="_blank">Page 2 Page 3 Page 4

What Is Butt Dust?

Thanks to Ray O'

What, you ask, is 'Butt dust'? Read on and you'll discover the joy in it! These have to be original and genuine. No adult is this creative!!

JACK (age 3)

was watching his Mom breast-feeding his new baby sister... After a while he asked: 'Mom why have you got two? Is one for hot and one for cold milk?'

MELANIE (age 5)

asked her Granny how old she was.. Granny replied she was so old she didn't remember any more. Melanie said, 'If you don't remember you must look in the back of your panties. Mine say five to six.'

STEVEN (age 3)

hugged and kissed his Mom good night. 'I love you so much that when you die I'm going to bury you outside my bedroom window.'

BRITTANY (age 4)

had an ear ache and wanted a pain killer. She tried in vain to take the lid off the bottle. Seeing her frustration, her Mom explained it was a child-proof cap and she'd have to open it for her. Eyes wide with wonder, the little girl asked: 'How does it know it's me?'

SUSAN (age 4)

was drinking juice when she got the hiccups. 'Please don't give me this juice again,' she said, 'It makes my teeth cough..'

DJ (age 4)

stepped onto the bathroom scale and asked: 'How much do I cost?'

CLINTON (age 5)

was in his bedroom looking worried When his Mom asked what was troubling him, he replied, 'I don't know what'll happen with this bed when I get married. How will my wife fit in it?'

MARC (age 4)

was engrossed in a young couple that were hugging and kissing in a restaurant. Without taking his eyes off them, he asked his dad: 'Why is he whispering in her mouth?'

TAMMY(age 4)

was with her mother when they met an elderly, rather wrinkled woman her Mom knew. Tammy looked at her for a while and then asked, 'Why doesn't your skin fit your face?'

JAMES (age 4)

was listening to a Bible story. His dad read: 'The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt.' Concerned, James asked: 'What happened to the flea?'

The Sermon I think this Mom will never forget ...

This particular Sunday sermon....'Dear Lord,' the minister began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face. 'Without you, we are but dust...' He would have continued but at that moment my very obedient daughter who was listening leaned over to me and asked quite audibly in her shrill little four year old girl voice, 'Mom, what is butt dust?'

Knowledge Test

Thanks to Ray O'

These are pretty clever. Try to resist moving too quickly. Look at each picture, try to determine what it represents, and then look at the answer below the picture.

LIGHT BEER

CARD SHARK

ASSAULTED PEANUT

DOCTOR PEPPER

EGG PLANT

KNIGHT MARE

WHOLE MILK

KING OF POP

TAP DANCERS

GATOR AIDE

A POOL TABLE

AND FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i-POD

Redneck Art

Thanks to Lee

Art in Stockholm Subway

Thanks to Ray O'

Google Presentation

CNN News photographer

Thanks to David H

His request approved, the CNN News photographer quickly used a cell phone to call the local airport to charter a flight.

He was told a twin-engine plane would be waiting for him at the airport.

Arriving at the airfield, he spotted a plane warming up outside a hanger.

He jumped in with his bag, slammed the door shut, and shouted, 'Let's go'.

The pilot taxied out, swung the plane into the wind and took off.

Once in the air, the photographer instructed the pilot,

'Fly over the valley and make low passes so I can take pictures of the fires on the hillsides.'

'Why?' asked the pilot.

'Because I'm a photographer for CNN News,' he responded,

'and I need to get some close up shots.'

The pilot was strangely silent for a moment, finally he stammered,

'So, what you're telling me, is .. . . You're NOT my flight instructor?'

"Life is short.

Drink the good wine first"

MP Expenses

Thanks to Ray

60's Songs Revisited

Thanks to Ray O'

Some of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers who can remember doing the "Limbo" as if it were yesterday .