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OH MY GOD, IS DIO ACTUALLY UPDATING WITH AN ARTICLE UNRELATED TO MONTH LONG EVENTS?
You're darn tootin'. While the summer has come and gone, and with it all my time (for those out of the loop, I teach science as an after school part-time job, but in the summer, I work full day camps for 5 days in a row), its about time I get back into the habit of actually writing non-fiction.
Cuz you know. Writing about cool stuff and actually liking it unironically is how an old soul like me rolls.
Most of you guys know I set up Random Lunacy as a sort of tribute, God-I-wish-I-were-that-cool homage to my favorite site: X-Entertainment, whose successor Dinosaur Dracula is just as amazing if not more so. And while these days I don't have the time to go online to read forever (excepting any news on the new Fatal Frame projects @_@), I do stop by and read DinoDrac when I can. Why? Because I love stuff.
Matt's been doing monthly funpacks to help supplement the awesome site and though I missed August (like I said, I was busy all summer, least of all that being in florida for half of it), I immediately signed up for september, and onwards. I'm a sucker for kitchy stuff, and at that price for a box of random stuff, I was sold. That and its my way of giving back to a guy whose always found a way to brighten my day with weird stuff and the coherence to make it sound even more awesome. It takes a special person to find delight and wonder in some of the most abnormal, normal things of this world, and has time to appreciate it, and I'm glad he's one of those kinda guys.
SO!! While its relevant, September, and I've got the pics on the iPhone, let's checkout what Dio got in her box OF GOODNESS. PIC HEAVY. Not enough warning? TOO BAD.
There's something wonderful about receiving packages in the mail when its not Christmas. I dunno why, but I just love it.
Yes, I blacked out addresses. Cuz I think privacy is a wonderful thing, and I don't want pizza's sent to my place I have to pay for. But there's the bad boy right there.
You have no idea how excited I was to get this, seeing the box underneath my flimsy doormat (seriously, though, who is that fooling? Thank god they didn't try leaving it in the recycle can like one family unfortunately had happen, and there went a laptop). My 90 lbs black lab Cody likes to bark at the mailmen so much that the UPS guys are affectionately called "Chuck n' Run". Its pretty self-explanatory.
Anyway. When I took this in, it was like Hideki with Chi in Chobits. My precious. :9
Its the little things I love. The Post-it with the face on it, and the stickers.
Fucking LOVE IT. :3
Oh man, here's the schwag. Tucked into this awesome lil box is a bunch of things I know I'm gonna be putting on my walls. This wasn't exactly as it came, since I've taken things out from when I first got it to show off, and that piece on the top is one of the big ticket items. Let's take a closer look.
Won't we?
LET GO OF HIM, YOU BITCH.
Its an Aliens Alien Queen watch. Yessir, if you really want to freak the kids out at school, you wrap that bitch around your wrist and tell the world to JUST DARE to ask what time it is. I haven't opened it yet. Not for the fact it might be valuable one day, but that the packaging is actually kinda cool. And of that ilk that basically will cut your hands open the moment you try prying it apart. I like my queens, but this one can stay in her package, thank you very much. Does it work? Presumably, but I'm sure there's a lot of tiny screws involved and seeing those damn things makes a piece of my soul die when I have to deal with them.
Love that Google-esque Hope logo though. So Primary Color plus green beautiful.
IS IT??? IT IS, FOLKS. ITS A GEN-YOO-INE ADVENTURES OF KOOL-AID MAN COMIC.
Now, you gotta understand, I came to know these holy books from Matt himself, when he once did a review of another issue, and holy molly monday, guys, I have always wanted one of these bad boys in my hands since then. Please, do yourself a favor and check out the article. I'm going to try milking this one for my own later, since this one has THE epic that introduced us to:
*insert drumroll*
PURPLESAURUS REX.
I know. I'm giddy this excitement and I'm seriously not being factitious. Archie Comics have given us a lot of stuff over the years, from their titular character and his harem, as well as those beloved (…not sure about adding a ? there or not…) Sonic comics, but these Kool-Aid man comics to me were the best use of product placement ever.
And they gave us Scorch who gave us THIS amazing gem.
Seriously, if you aren't working "Roast my toast" into everyday speech, you are cheating yourself.
Here's the back ad for the popsicles. Its a little on the California Raisins side of the dark side, but hell if it doesn't make me crave ice pops in september.
Moving on to our next item, a bumper sticker:
…..so that means wear no clothes, eat crackers and milk, drive construction equipment without a class F license and terrorize kindly robots I've enslaved to do my housework, and eventually behead them and hang them on your garage. Ok.
THIS IS JUST LIKE SE7EN!!!
Next item of intense interest: a sample of the legendary Ecto Cooler.
That's what it says on the package, bro, and doncha know it. Ecto-Cooler, THE PREMIER Hi-C flavor we've all loved and lost, this lil piece comes from one box, packaged in a really cute specimen sample with a certificate of totally real. Pretty sure I've got a part of the orange and a bit of the green label, but nonetheless, I could have gotten the ingredient list and have been over the moon. I think I've had it…once. Back when I went through a phase of my life saying I was "allergic" to Ghostbusters stuff so no one would know I harbored a secret crush on Egon.
….Oh don't you roll your eyes at me, you know you did too.
Another legacy of what made XE awesome, Matt did an article trying to uncover what happened to our beloved spirit juice here. With a walk down memory lane with the commercial, he even goes in-depth with the juice itself, how it was lost to time after the GB fad faded, and how it was once again found when he did a lil digging into (then) current flavors. Do yourself a favor and give it also a read, fascinating stuff.
Next set of items:
A pack of cards and a sticker and a pin. The E.T. pin looks like its from Universal City Studios, so I think its one of those gift shop impulse items by the checkout from years ago. I always was a lil creeped out by the way E.T. looked but his taste in candy was second to none. The packs look to be, if I recall exactly, small trading card alternative to halloween candy from way back when. Of super interest to me was the Mario set. I'm VERY CERTAIN, I saw that exact pack from one of Matt's articles on these babies, either from a rental video run or another kitchy shop years ago, so I'm thrilled. Haven't opened them up yet but I can tell you those Mario cards are going in a scrapbook.
The Toxic Crusader. The boyfriend was pretty hyped about those, and the Skeleton Warriors, which is cool because admittedly I'm not that familiar with either. Toxie in the movie always scared me (I'm a puss, I admit it), and I never really got into the show. About as much about the series that I know is that Troma Entertainment, that brought us awesome schlock like TC, also owned both 50th Street Films, which gave us the superior (to me, of course, cuz I grew up on it) dub of My Neighbor Totoro. Yeah, talk about weird roommates and strange bedfellows.
Next up is this teeny lil book on our cavemen ancestors. No. Seriously. These were from a series of books called, no joke, The Original Pocket Rockets. I can't imagine the kids they were aimed at got that double entendre, and I hope most didn't til years later. This one is about, obvs, ancient man, from Lucy up to the first farm society, of course in tiny bite sized pieces and easy on the small reader's palette. Nothing ground-breaking, but nonetheless a nice handy book if you need something to read white you're boiling water for your ramen.
Of worthy note is the flyleaf design. So wonderfully 90s.
Gotta love graphic design from the 90s. Bold color and lots of simple shapes.
Wash down your meal with a pitcher of Ghoul-Aid, and set your frosty mug on a Bud Lite coaster with a creepy pumpkin. The boyfriend had a minor panic when he saw the pack of ghoul-aid, seeing as how were were just fawning over an antique shred of Ecto-Cooler, but don't worry, this is a newer pack of Kool-Aid, and the date proclaims its shelf life ended back in July of this year.
Kool-Aid doesn't go bad anyhow.
Right?
Fuckit, when have I ever backed down from a food challenge anyway. I tried the caramel apple twizzlers and I'm alive. And with all those preservatives, I'm pretty sure its gonna be drinkable. Come on. Its Kool-Aid Man dressed as Dracula. You'd be crazy NOT to drink.
Damn, brings a whole new meaning to drinking the Kool-Aid.
Hey! A trick or treat baggie!! This lil fella has some lumpy goodness packed in its white stomach. let's pop it open and see what neighbor Matt handed me. :9
Hmmm. Some fake webbing and a plastic spider. Neato. A robot sticker. It apparently goes on glass to decorate your drinkwear with roboty goodness. Fucking rad. I love robots.
I spy a plastic skull book mark, which is swell cuz I also plan on reviewing more kiddy books this countdown. :3
A dracula eraser bust to put on a No. 2 pencil, should I ever really need to use one. And one of my favorite kinds of cheap, grab a bag with a million of them cuz its bag filler, candy: a Dum Dum. Laugh if you will but I go through those like a 2 pack a day smoker. And one more thing:
Oh!! A trading card of BBQ!
……I'm going to hell for that. Totally worth it though.
Now let's get to the real reason I bought the funpack. And I slap my autocorrect for trying to leave out the "f" in funpack.
The mini posters! As I stated, I had my head in the clouds and missed the first, August funpack (I'm pretty sure I missed something totally awesome :[. ), so when i saw that September's was gonna include the poster I missed, I promptly purchased the subscription. The Ecto-Cooler was the icing on my cake.
August has Dino Drac having a nice end of the summer day, with bats galore and a stylin' Dino Drac with sunglasses.
Seriously guys, best thing everrrrrr.
The consensus may say the posters are simple, but to me, they represent everything I love about the site. its a lot like the lil drawing on the post-it. It shows a labor of love included inside. And that made me happy more than anything else.
1) a mini-murder
2) someone's grave
3) eye see you
4) a cry for help
I think I'm gonna try putting these on my wall cuz I just love the size and the color. They're pretty damn nice prints.
Saving the bests for lasts. Included in the box is a nice newsletter on the contents and thanks for the support. And its really signed too! :3
And a checklist to finish before October officially kicks in. I've done a few but I'm hoping to squeeze another article out of it before October (and for what I will hope will be another one to complete, yay). But until I got pics, they NEVER HAPPENED. 8o
And that's the awesome September Dino Drac funpack. I love the loot in here (already enjoyed the Dum Dum hell yeah), and I look forward to the next one with great anticipation.
Though the new Fatal Frame is one I'm waiting for with more, but that's another article for another time….
Happy September!
--Dio (9/28/14)
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