The Wisest One in the Room

The Wisest One in the Room, How You Can Benefit from Social Psychology's Most Powerful Insights, by Thomas Gilovich and Lee Ross, Simon & Schuster, 2016

The Wisest One in the Room,  the work of two social psychologists, may help us navigate deep social questions, like the ones that have appeared post-election.  They clearly raise awareness and insight around why we behave certain ways during conflicts, and why we make certain choices. 

For instance, the authors ask why people tend to get more enjoyment, and more enduring satisfaction, from spending their money on experiences like concerts, vacations, and skiing lessons than on material goods such as clothing, jewelry, and furniture.  And they ask why people are more likely to regret things they didn't do, rather than things they did that went awry.  The authors call these experiential purchases, and they note, as did Humphrey Bogart at the end of Casablanca, "We'll always have Paris," that they live on and provide even more enduring enjoyment in the stories we tell, the memories we cherish.  

Here's another insight from The Wisest One in the Room -   the authors state that parents in today's developed world do not think of their children as valuable economic assets - as people who will help them economically when they grow old and their finances are more stressed.   Do you agree?  Further, they claim that parents now agree like never before that "there is nothing more rewarding in life than raising a child."  Are these trends related?  As to whether the financial costs of raising kids - $193,680, a low ball figure in the Northeast -  can overwhelm the emotional aspect, the authors seem to say that people with children will choose to endure hardship for the enjoyment of seeing their offspring in action and growing.    Although they present us with the theory of dissonance to make sense of this phenomenon, their real world illustrations are more lasting.  Think the thrill of assembling an IKEA bookcase, compared with the higher priced, finished piece.   

Why is this book relevant to our own lives?  The authors' insight offers opportunities and choices for our life experiences, especially with family and co-workers.  It does not hurt to have diverse expert opinions because although we may not agree completely with the authors' view of social history, their perspectives are valuable and useful.