STRONGER

STRONGER, Develop the Resilience You Need to Succeed, by Everly, Strouse, and McCormack, amacom 2015

What can a former Navy SEAL tell us about why some people rise above hardships and pressure with renewed determination, while others fall prey to disabling self-doubt?

Using examples from the stories of baseball great Cal Ripken, neurosurgeon Benjamin Carson, former Maryland Governor Martin O'Malley and recovered paraplegic Pat Rummerfield, we have the rare opportunity of seeing how these survivors became winners. 

In 1974 at age 21 Rummerfield was in a post-bachelor-party car accident.  Ar 135 miles per hour his body was launched through the windshield; he broke four vertebra and various other bones in his body, , damaged one eye, sliced off part of his scalp, and was given 72 hours to live.  One week later he was still alive, but doctors told him he would be a quadriplegic the rest of his life.  This is where the book gets hard:

Rummerfield's comeback began when he was lying in bed thinking about how much he would like to play basketball, and how he would love to drive a race car.  At that point his toe moved.  Against his physician's advice, Rummerfield insisted on beginning a regimen of intensive daily physical therapy.

Not only has Rummerfield made history with his recovery of movement, in 1992 he competed in an Ironman triathlon.  In 1997 he became one of 82 people to complete the Antarctica Marathon.  

And this is where the book gets personal.  For me, having spent two years recovering from a broken hip and knee, eight months on crutches, then rebuilding balance,  and now breast cancer, the story of Rummerfield's positive  goals and relentless focus on the target is very positive reinforcement.  I want to think about this book and the other stories as I work through my recovery.  I am a little less sure about my goals than I was with my earlier recovery, but I learned the power of positive imaging, and blocking out negativity from my earlier work. And I think from my mother - I was born blind, later regained sight, but she insisted when I had trouble learning to read Dick and Jane, that I could not give up.  Every day after school when the other kids were outside playing, she drilled me until finally the letters made words and the words made sense.  I learned more than simple Dick and Jane from that work.  I was lucky.

Rummerfield:  "I kept telling myself that everything was going to be ok and God has a plan for me.  This isn't the end.  I refused to give up trying.  I kept working and working toward my goals, knowing eventually I would achieve them.  They might be generic goals, meaning I might not be able to win the Ironman, but I finished one.  I'll take a generic victory any day...  The only time we fail is when we quit.  You never give up, you never give in, and with time you will develop an iron will.  From that you will always win.  I tell myself that over an over again.  You can choose to be sad.  I was taught early on by the gentleman that adopted me (Rummerfield came from an orphanage), don't waste time on negative thoughts or actions.  Thinking woe is me isn't going to get you where you want to be.  You have to keep telling yourself to move forward.   No matter how dark it gets or how unlikely it looks, keep pushing yourself.  In a marathon you come around the bend and see the finish line.  Gotta keep pushing yourself until you reach the finish line...

Mill Girl Verdict:  Best, best book all summer.  A++++