I was reading on Taoism, and I had a horrifying thought. What if I have been wrong?
So I looked at my writing, and I don’t think I have been. What I said about nature and civilization is valid. What I said about love and beauty is valid. What I said about psychology is valid. What I said about positive synthesis and valued vs. non-valued dualities is valid. Same with my observations on gender and politics.
When I was reading the Bible I had another horrifying thought. It made me feel like I’m demon spawn. Demon spawn or not, I will make the most of my life. I will contribute what I have to contribute and I will enjoy myself. And then God will decide what to do with my soul.
I have had many influences. So have most people my generation. We live in a world where everyone is influencing everyone else. Scott Lasch said that it resulted in people being morally at sea. Some say that this results in lack of integrity. What this really results in is people not being able to get away with bigoted worldviews. People lose integrity; they gain wisdom.
So here I am, examining all sorts of things that are out there. I started out passionately believing in Communism; then that got taken apart, and I had to look elsewhere. A person who believes passionately about one cause can do the same thing about another if he finds it valid. Many people who were raised in Communism become strong Christians when they come to places like USA. That is because, once again, they are used to believing strongly in things; and people who believe strongly in one thing can just as strongly believe in something else.
I am naturally a fanatic, but I’ve had many incompatible influences, and for me finding something to believe in strongly is a challenge. One thing comes along; another comes along and topples it. With influences ranging from Christianity to psychology to Communism to Objectivism to astrology to Hindu mysticism, I have had to put in a lot of effort into figuring out what is what. I have come up with original thought in the process. And this thought can be useful for many other people.
It appears that this is the way to wisdom. Study everything, then figure out who is right and about what. You will lose integrity; you will gain wisdom. And this wisdom will then be formative to a better and more informed integrity.