News scroll
How many pickled peppers did Peter Piper pick?
New Vista Smartest School in the Nation with 2.7 GPA
Swag levels are on the rise school wide
Student claims to be too hipster for his shirt
Senior claims to be "bringing sexy back"
Unicorns cause traffic back ups on Broadway (or a highway)
A student is in critical condition after coming to Marco's class late two days in a row.
"Pfouts Index" becomes the most googled word of 2013
Earth Task Force Concerned About Extinction of Study Center Mice
Kirk calls emergency Community Gathering to say everything is all right
Internet Trolls Invade New Vista
Tas accuses several late students of being "Tardy"
RJ to introduce optional torture to help students talk.
Ultimate team admits to using imaginary frisbees.
New Vista Computers to run on diesel.
Draco Malfoy flunks Spanish 3
Synonyms reek havoc on course sylabii
PA system "not frustrating" sarcastic teachers report
New Vista to introduce pay toilets
Cat in hat shorter in real life
Openly straight student bullied at New Vista
Bigfoot Slain by Boulder Police Department: City Outraged
Maintenance crews fix A/C just in time for fall
Recent survey finds that Joe has the highest approval rating over all other faculty
Mentor hoodwinks student teacher
Ultimate Frisbee team to start looking for a new hobby
Dihydrogen Monoxide contaminates New Vista drinking fountains
Mathletes go on Oprah to confess doping
New Vista ofiice swamped in unoppened spam mail, prankster suspected.
Giant Cookie attacks cycalists outside of New Vista.
New study shows students like computer lab because of computers
New Vista to fight bad grades by not letting students study
ETF finds dehydrated mucus out front to serve as alternative fuel source
Traces of fruit discovered in cafeteria apples
Seniors lack of ideas for culminating projects, "The good one have all been done already."
Mike forgets to wipe emotional his feet at the door.
Student runs out of things to text, does math homework
Cafeteria "pesto pizza" in reality lust last monday's moldy leftovers
Obama Seeking To Reform “Common Sense”
Obama Fed Up With White House Paintings Puts Add On Craigslist For Interior Decorator
Obama paints/stains Cabinet
Cops At Standoff With Man Threatening To Shoot Trees
Obama Hunts Clay Pigeons, PETA outraged
Controversy! Does Obama really have noise canceling ear muffs?
Ivette launches new program: frequent flyers--students earn miles for wandering.
Alex and Tracy sign extra duty contract for opening the staff room door
Upstairs bathrooms found to be imported from airports
Diane and Julie "Run the Wizard."
NBC hopes for record ratings for 2015 Advisory Olympics
Google crashes. BVSD at total loss
Alex's stats class found guilty of gambling
Detention now just one bid dance party with free pizza. Students ditch class more often
Student finishes homework in Finish It.
Hacky Sack team prepares for Nationals
Student feels he's "done enough" this quarter
Teacher underwhelmed by number of papers turned in
Other teacher mildly whelmed by Equity Check-in
New entrance actually a skatepark
Local Lunch Scandal: Sweatshop Quinoa.
Senior not graduating because of CE--but I signed up--why didn't I get the credit?
Moldy refrigerator wins 'Green School Award'; ETF cashes the check.
Toner gets replaced in Study Center printer - oh wait, that didn't happen.
Parents complain after 8th grader shadows a student in ISS.
Pfouts takes Friday off too.
Student spends too much time on the internet, now only speaks in memes
Junior Proposes to Build Teeth Gleaming Machine for Culminating Project
Dave Solzberg's Performance Ensemble Class scheduled to Play Show on New Vista Roof During Exhibition Day
Joe sprays fish fertilizer on lawn, hopes to keep smokers off grass
NVHS elevator set to elevate test scores.
NVHS Staff Sabotages Student's Credit Count Because "She's just great to have around"
NVHS Sabotages Patrick's Credit Count Due to Need for More Programming Classes
Earth Task Force Creates New Technology Capable of Recycling Students