Sunday Family Humour 9th November Page 2
Sunday Family Humour 9th November Page 2
Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour
MENTAL EXERCISE QUIZ: nine questions
Thanks to David M.
These are not trick questions.
They are straight questions with straight answers..
1. Name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends.
2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?
3 Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?
4. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?
5. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?
6. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters ' dw' and they are all common words. Name two of them.
7. There are 14 punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name at least half of them?
8. Name the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form except fresh.
9. Name 6 or more things that you can wear on your feet beginning with the letter 'S.'Answers To Quiz:
1. The one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends:Boxing.
2. North American landmark constantly moving backward: Niagara Falls .. The rim is worn down about two and a half feet each year because of the millions of gallons of water that rush over it every minute.
3. Only two vegetables that can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons:Asparagus and rhubarb.
4. The fruit with its seeds on the outside:Strawberry.
5. How did the pear get inside the brandy bottle? It grew inside the bottle. The bottles are placed over pear buds when they are small, and are wired in place on the tree. The bottle is left in place for the entire growing season. When the pears are ripe, they are snipped off at the stems.
6. Three English words beginning with dw:Dwarf, dwell and dwindle...
7. Fourteen punctuation marks in English grammar: Period, comma, colon, semicolon, dash, hyphen, apostrophe, question mark, exclamation point, quotation mark, brackets, parenthesis, braces, and ellipses.
8. The only vegetable or fruit never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form but fresh: Lettuce.
9. Six or more things you can wear on your feet beginning with 'S': Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis, skates, snowshoes, stockings, stilts.
Amazing Flower Displays
Thanks to Paula M.
Jazz in Istanbul
Thanks to Paul S.
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Murray's Montage
Thanks to Murray S.
Atheist in the Woods
Thanks to Eleanor S.
An atheist was walking through the woods.
"What majestic trees!"
"What powerful rivers!"
"What beautiful animals!"
he said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he hearda rustling in the bushes behind him.
He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder
and saw that the bear was closing in on him.
He looked over his shoulder again and the bear was even closer.
He tripped and fell on the ground.
He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him,
reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant moment, the atheist cried out:
"OH MY GOD!"
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.
"You deny my existence for all these years, teach others
I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident."
"Do you expect me to help you out of this predictment?"
"Am I to count you as a believer?"
The atheist looked directly into the light and said, "It would
be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a
Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"
"Very well."
The light went out. the sounds of the forest resumed.
Andthe bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together,
bowed his head and spoke:
"Lord bless this food which I am about to receive
from Thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."
Great Lines
Thanks to Paul S.
As We Age
Thanks to Paula M.
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