Sunday Family Humour 5th October Page 2

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

Golf one-liners

Thanks to Ray O'.

These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. ~ Sam Snead

I was three over. One over a house, one over a patio, and one over a swimming pool.

~ George Brett

Actually, the only time I ever took out a one-iron was to kill a tarantula. And I took a 7 to do that. ~ Jim Murray

The only sure rule in golf is - he who has the fastest cart never has to play the bad lie.

~ Mickey Mantle

I don't fear death, but I sure don't like those three-footers for par..

~ Chi Rodriguez

After all these years, it's still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour.

Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham

on rye.

~ Chi Rodriguez

The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of the tree ~ Brian Weis

Swing hard in case you hit it. ~ Dan Marino

My favorite shots are the practice swing and the conceded putt. The rest can never be mastered.

~ Lord Robertson

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. ~ Jack Benny

There is no similarity between golf and putting; they are two different games,

one played in the air, and the other on the ground. ~ Ben Hogan

Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you're the best

~ Jack Nicklaus

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. It's almost a law.

~ H G Wells

I never pray on a golf course. Actually, the Lord answers my prayers

everywhere except on the course.~ Billy Graham

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf..

~ Bob Hope

While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.

~ Henny Youngman

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.

~ Jack Lemmon

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives.

Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

~ Lee Trevino

MOST POWERFUL COMMERCIAL EVER

Thanks to Tony H.

Everyone needs to see this one. This is pretty awesome, and it only takes a minute!

Hong Kong movie theater asks its patrons to leave their cellphones ON when they enter the movie.

Using that, Volkswagen made an eye opening ad

Paula's Pictures

Thanks to Paula M.

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Smokin' Hot Video Highlights From The Cameron Airshow

Thanks to David H.

For all the pilots out there .... And those others.

Spain

Thanks to Lee

Spain

Man with an incredible talent!

Thanks to Alex S.

South Dakotan sculptor John Lopez creates life-sized scrap metal sculptures with a uniquely Western American twist. In his hands, old discarded farm equipment is recycled into sculptures of iconic creatures from the American West like a bison, a horse plowing a field, or a Texas Longhorn. Lopez already had a career as a bronze sculptor, but after creating a family grave for his deceased aunt using scrap metal, he began creating recycled metal sculptures out of found or donated pieces of metal as well. “My favorite part about these pieces is the texture,” explains Lopez. “I just start grabbin’ stuff from the pile and welding it in, and if you weld enough of the same thing on over and over it creates this really cool texture that I’ve never seen in these kinds of pieces before. I think that’s what draws people in.”

Fort Lauderdale - Venice in America

Thanks to Lee

FORT LAUDERDALE -Venice in AMERICA

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