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Have you ever wanted to put an actual number on the exact amount of irritating you are?
The TSR Editors are tirelessly committed to making our readers feel aptly bad about themselves, and in that spirit of Internet bullying, we have helpfully put together not only a list of cringe-worthy things you may be doing, but also an easy way for you to score yourself on your own intolerability.
All of these are nauseatingly annoying; how many are you guilty of?
1 point for each one you’ve owned/worn/committed:
1. Accosting and admonishing strangers for political views
2. Backing into parking spots
3. Saying “no worries”
4. Having bed bugs/pets of any kind
5. Purchasing Dominoes “pizza”
6. Using the phrase “it is what it is”
7. Having long round yellow crusty toenails
8. Wearing Birkenstocks
9. Number 7 inside number 8
10. Watching your stupid favorite TV show
11. Burning popcorn (in this case it’s hate the sinner AND the sin)
12. Those hand-painted signs with the family’s surname and the est. date
13. Referring to your wife as “My bride” on any day other than your wedding day
14. Joint Facebook accounts
15. Indiscriminate sharing of nonsensical and erroneous political memes
16. Wearing carpenter jeans
17. Wallets with chains attached
18. Repurposing
19. Social media-based businesses/pyramid schemes (e.g., plexus, norwex, Jamberry, usborne, etc.)
20. Stretch denim
21. Vampire romance novels
22. Amish romance novels
23. Christian romance novels
24. Christian Amish vampire romance novels
25. Sharing inspirational memes
26. Referring to your S.O. as your “best friend”
27. Putting your drama on the Internet
28. Telling your classmate “We had fun without you” when he gets back from having chickenpox in third grade and is already feeling lost and detached
29. Making ambiguous/vague posts: “I’m so done with today!” Etc.
30. Being offended
31. Ordering things off infomercials
32. Shopping the As Seen on TV section
33. Feeling superior to losers
34. Drinking tea
35. Reading celebrity gossip magazines
36. Watching home remodeling themed shows
37. Taking gym selfies
38. Posting about food and activities you are giving up
39. Posting about food
40. Judging people for what they post about
Now that you have a specific number to correspond with how cringey you are, it’s time to check your score:
1-3 points: You’re kind of a loser, but maybe you can hide it.
4-6 points: Now you know why you have no friends.
7 or 10 points: Did the devil get a Facebook account?
11 or more points: Delete your account. Do better. This is a bad look. Dumpster fire meme. Ach. Oh, MM-mm.
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