Original Date of Post: 07/06/2008
Narrator: The day before graduation! For many of graduating seniors, there isn’t really a more stressful time. Even though finals are out of the way and there is a break from school, students eagerly await to walk down the aisle to get their diploma. But a lot can happen at this time involving friends and family. And it looks like these two boys are going to be caught in the crossfire.
Marcus: Okay, I think I got this thing to work! (Turns on video camera) Now if you break this camera, I will break your legs.
Todd: Oh, go suck on my hairy walnuts!
Marcus: No thanks. That’s Harley’s job. I could call…
Todd: It’s just an expression!
Marcus: I just want this to be perfect. We’re on a deadline and graduation is tomorrow. I need to get a video commentary from everybody and then we finish can the video tonight.
Todd: Yeah, thanks for waiting until the last minute to do this crap. We had a full week to do this.
Marcus: Yeah, well I had some things come up this past week.
Todd: Well I had some plans for this afternoon too, but apparently I can’t do that.
Marcus: Oh you did not have plans. You were just going to go home and fantasize about Ann Coulter.
Todd: Hey, she’s a very pretty lady.
Marcus: Just shut up and record!
Todd: About that. The camera has been on since you threatened to break my legs.
Marcus: WHAT?! Rewind the damn tape!
Todd: Whatever you say, you big sap!
Marcus: And don’t just pretend to press the rewind button!
Todd: Fine! Okay, are you ready?
Marcus: Perfect! Hello everybody! My name is Marcus (truck horn honks) and this is a special video. And helping me film this is a good friend of mine, Todd. (Todd turns the camera around)
Todd: Hi people! I’m Todd…expert in film!
Marcus: That’s enough from you! Anyways, in just a matter of 24 hours, I, my friends, and the rest of my fellow classmates will be walking down that aisle to get our diploma and we will be off to bigger and better things. Like college! I just got accepted into the Community College across town. But enough about me and my accomplishment! These last four years at Pallet High have really been something else. But Lord knows that it wouldn’t have been the best without all of my best friends. I’m going to visit my closest friends to have them shed some light on the high school experience and how it feels to graduate.
Todd: So where to first?
Marcus: I don’t know.
Todd: It’s already 7:30am and you…
Marcus: Relax dude! We just get a few commentaries here and there, stick it in at the end of each of their segments that I’ve already got, and it’ll be ready to view by this evening.
Todd: That may sound good on paper but…
Marcus: Relax! Oh, I know where we can go! Marisa lives close by!
Todd: Okay then, let’s go. (At Marisa’s house)
Marisa: Mom, did the mail come yet?
Michelle: I told you yesterday, the mail doesn’t come this early.
Marisa: Bunch of lazy asses! Why the hell are they at work at 5:30am if they can’t deliver a damn letter telling me if I got in college or not?!
Michelle: Oh and some of your friends are here.
Marisa: Tell them I’m busy!
Marcus: Hey little buddy!
Todd: How about a few words for the camera?
Marisa: Not now you guys! I’m in the middle of something. Hmm…let me see. Nothing from them on my email!
Marcus: Azalea Art Institute, I assume.
Marisa: Of course.
Todd: Give it up Marisa! That school is so exclusive! Marcus and I got turned down from those snooty bastards!
Marcus: (Quietly) Not so exclusive that Tracey gets accepted. (Marisa growls)
Todd: What makes you think you’ve got a chance?
Marisa: Yeah well I did a special admissions so there’s still a 50/50 chance that they’ll accept me.
Marcus: I take it that you’re only doing this because Tracey got in and you didn’t.
Marisa: No.
Marcus: (Talks into the camera) She’s been a little frantic for the last few days. She’s been fighting with her boyfriend, Tracey. She thinks that if she gets into the school, she can make up with him and they can go back to loving each other again. Sound about right?
Todd: Like hitting the nail on the head!
Marisa: THAT’S IT! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!
Marcus: Just say a few things you loved about high school!
Marisa: This! (Punches Marcus in the gut) Now goodbye! (Slams the door)
Todd: I guess Tracey was the red-button today. Glad I got off easy!
Marcus: (Groans) I guess we caught her at a bad time. I’ll get Marisa another time…when she’s not so violent.
Todd: I suppose. So what now?
Marcus: I think we’re close to May’s place.
Todd: Okay. We’ll do her next!
Marcus: Excellent! (Into the camera) Our next stop will be over at May’s house. May is always in such a happy mood.
Todd: Regular May is…Pregnant May, I am not so sure. (At May’s house)
Max: Hi Marcus! What’s with the video camera?
Marcus: I’m trying to make a video of all of my friends the day before Graduation.
Max: That sounds cool.
Todd: So where’s May?
Marcus: Hey, I’m the host! Your job is not to speak, but to film!
Todd: Bite me!
Max: She’s in her room! (He opens the door) Hey sis! (May vomits in a trash can) I didn’t need to see that.
May: Who said you could come in here? (Max runs out)
Marcus: Sorry about intruding May. It’s just that Todd and I are making a video in honor of tomorrow. So once you’re finished with that trash can, would you mind saying something for the camera?
May: Sure Marcus! (She gets up)
Marcus: I've been meaning to ask, isn't it a little late to have morning sickness?
May: I don't think it was that. I honestly think it's because I ate a little too much at breakfast. (Voice from outside the room)
Max: She had three helpings!
May: (Growls) SHUT UP MAX! (Sighs) Okay Marcus, whenever you're ready.
Marcus: Got it! Ready Todd? (Todd gives a thumbs up) Okay folks, this is May. She transferred to Pallet High at the beginning of junior year. Since then, this little lady's made quite the reputation for herself. First off, she was able to get the high school heart throb and now she’s carrying his baby.
Todd: I thought she was known as the class slut!
May: What? (Tears up)
Marcus: Todd didn’t mean to…
May: Is that why you’re interviewing me? To make me look bad! I have feelings too you know! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! (At the front door)
Todd: What about the interview?
May: Here’s your interview! (Kicks Todd in the crotch) GET OFF OUR PROPERTY OR I’M CALLING THE COPS! (Slams the door)
Marcus: And I would register that as a magnitude 9.2 on the mood swing scale. I have to hand it to Drew for putting up with that 24/7. (Todd groans) You moron! Now we’re short two people!
Todd: (Groans) Hey, I didn’t yell at you when you pissed off Marisa.
Marcus: Hey, at least I didn’t call anybody a slut! I have more sense than that. I guess we can always visit Drew. (At Drew’s house) Drew! (Knocks on the door) Are you in there?
Todd: Maybe no one’s home! (Marcus opens the door) Marcus, you can’t just barge in someone’s house like that!
Marcus: It was unlocked so somebody must be home.
Todd: This isn’t Canada!
Marcus: Drew, are you in here!
Drew: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? I’m on the phone with an important person. Sorry you two, but this will have to wait. I’m so close on getting an apartment and I’ve been on hold for the last few minutes. So please you guys, just leave. I’ll see you later.
Marcus: Please Drew! A few words!
Drew: Fine! Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye! (Slams the door)
Marcus: Damn it! What the hell is wrong with these people? Graduation is supposed to be a happy time and a time to spend with friends!
Todd: Okay then. Who’s the next person you want to visit?
Marcus: I’ll regret it, but I think we can get some words from Harley. (At Harley’s house) Hey, the door is open again! What luck!
Todd: I don’t know if it’s luck!
Marcus: We’re only lucky if he doesn’t come out with a shotgun in his hand…or if he comes out wearing his birthday suit.
Todd: Thanks for that last mental image. Now I need crack to make me forget.
Marcus: You’re such a baby. Harley! Are you in here? (They walk inside) OH MY GOD!!! (Harley and Tucker make out on the couch) I think I’m going to be sicker than May!
Harley: Marcus, darling! I’m so glad that you’re here! I’m so happy! Isn’t this a happy occasion?
Marcus: It sure is Harley!
Tucker: Hi boys!
Marcus: How’s it going Tucker? How was your first semester?
Tucker: Very fun. I love it over at Sandgem, but it’s always good to be back here in town with my Harley-bear.
Harley: So what can I do for you boys?
Marcus: We’re trying to do some commentaries for our video about our time at Pallet High. Would you mind saying a few things for the camera?
Harley: Why sure hon! But if you boys could just stand outside for a few seconds, I must powder my nose! (Marcus and Todd go outside)
Marcus: See that? Now I’m glad somebody will finally say something for the camera. I’m so happy that Tucker is here because ever since he went off to college, the two of them have been very distant and that made Harley so sad. But with Tucker here, nothing can possibly go wrong. (Crash)
Harley: You jerk, I hate you! I HATE YOU!
Marcus: Wow that was fast!
Tucker: You are such a drama queen!
Harley: And you’re a giant asshole!
Todd: Let’s get the hell out of here!
Marcus: I’m with you! (They run to the car) Damn it all to hell!
Todd: Okay, so Marisa May, Drew, and Harley are a no-go. Who’s next?
Marcus: Kelly!
Todd: Hey yeah, your girlfriend is always in a chipper mood! (At Kelly’s house)
Kelly: MARCUS! (She hugs him) I’m so happy to see you!
Marcus: Todd and I are making a video with our closest friends and so far, we’re having no luck with it. So would you say a few things that you liked about high school?
Kelly: No problem Marcus! I’d love to help you with it!
Marcus: What is one thing you’ll always remember from your time at Pallet High?
Kelly: Well… (Erika runs up)
Erika: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? Kelly, what are you doing with your boyfriend? You know that Graduation is tomorrow and that we are singing!
Kelly: I didn’t forget!
Erika: Well get your ass back in here and practice some more!
Kelly: Sorry Marcus! (Erika slams the door)
Todd: That counts out Erika and Grace too. This is turning into a suicide mission!
Marcus: Sakura! She can save our butts! (At Sakura’s house)
Sakura: NO, NO, NO! Guys, I have to make a big speech tomorrow so I have no time for some video! Graduation is tomorrow and everyone is expecting that the Valedictorian speech is the best and I can’t let them down!
Marcus: Come on! Just one quick thing?
Sakura: Can’t spare it. I’m on a deadline. Have you ever had to make a speech in front of a big-ass crowd? Nope! Didn’t think so! Now goodbye! Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out! (Shoves them out and closes the door)
Marcus: Does singing in the theatre count?
Todd: Forget it Marcus! You’ve already lost this battle.
Marcus: You’re right. We can always try Brock! (At Brock’s house)
Brock: What are you guys doing here?
Marcus: Brock, do you mind saying a few things for the camera?
Brock: Sorry Marcus, can we do this another time? My WHOLE family is in town and they kind of have their minds set on this whole family togetherness crap. Maybe another time! (He closes the door)
Todd: Well this sucks! So where to next?
Marcus: I know, Tracey! We can always go with Tracey! (At Tracey’s house)
Tracey: Sorry you guys, I have an important guest coming in a little bit. It’s an important man from the college I got in to and if all goes well, I might get this scholarship.
Marcus: I cannot believe this is happening!
Todd: What about Ash and Misty?
Marcus: Provided that they’re not going through any kind of drama, I guess we can film them on tape and edit the rest tonight. (At Misty’s house)
Misty: THE ARMY?! Why on earth did you enlist in the army? You could get sent to war! You could spend all this time away from your loved ones! What the hell were you thinking?
Ash: Look Misty, you know I’m not going to get into any kind of school with the grades that I have. Besides, this very nice recruiter assured me that I was just going to get some basic training and when the time is right, send me off...
Misty: BUT YOU COULD GET KILLED! Didn't you even give the community college idea a chance?
Ash: I think I knew all the bad consequences when I signed up last week.
Misty: YOU SIGNED UP LAST WEEK?! This is the first I’m hearing about it!
Todd: Maybe we should stop rolling!
Marcus: No chance! We have to get some more footage!
Misty: LEAVE GOD DAMN IT!
Ash: Okay!
Misty: Not you! I’m not finished with you yet! I meant those two! (Todd and Marcus get thrown out)
Marcus: Are you alright?
Todd: I think I’ll live!
Marcus: Not you, I was talking to my camera! I have to make sure that no damage has gotten to my baby.
Todd: (Groans) I can’t believe this is turning into a complete disaster!
Marcus: Well let’s see what we can do with the footage we already have. (A little later at Marcus’s house)
Todd: These are some nice pictures you’ve put in the video!
Marcus: Thanks. Do you want me to give you a sneak preview?
Todd: Sure.
Marcus: Well, I won’t show you the main stuff. Mostly filler. But I’ll show you the end of the tribute. (Plays video)
Todd: You’re ending it with group pictures?
Marcus: Wait for it! (Rock music comes on)
May: Here’s your interview! (Kicks Todd in the crotch) GET OFF OUR PROPERTY OR I’M CALLING THE COPS!
Todd: (Grabs his crotch) I still feel the pain!
Marcus: Please Drew! A few words!
Drew: Fine! Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye!
Marisa: THAT’S IT! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!
Marcus: Just say a few things you loved about high school!
Marisa: This! (Punches Marcus in the gut) Now goodbye!
Todd: Ooh.
Misty: LEAVE GOD DAMN IT!
Ash: Okay!
Misty: Not you! I’m not finished with you yet! I meant those two! (Todd and Marcus get thrown out)
Harley: You jerk, I hate you! I HATE YOU!
Tucker: You are such a drama queen!
Harley: And you’re a giant asshole!
Kelly: Well… (Erika runs up)
Erika: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? Kelly, what are you doing with your boyfriend? You know that Graduation is tomorrow and that we are singing!
Kelly: I didn’t forget!
Erika: Well get your ass back in here and practice some more!
Sakura: Have you ever had to make a speech in front of a big-ass crowd? Nope! Didn’t think so! Now goodbye! Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out! (Shoves them out and closes the door)
Todd: Wow.
Marcus: Now then…I’m wondering if I should use the song The Way We Were instead of the rock music. Go for the same angle that was seen at the end of the movie, Dr. Strangelove!
Todd: You really are unbelievable. So this is going to be your tribute video? Basically slamming all of your friends!
Marcus: It’s not that bad!
Todd: Not that bad? In the video you show everyone’s good side and everyone being happy. But then you change it up and show their ugly sides. This sounds like something I would do, but not you. Is that how you want to view your friends?
Marcus: You can’t stop me if it’s what really happened.
Todd: You’re worse than Michael Moore!
Marcus: Keep in mind, I like Michael Moore.
Todd: You know what, screw it! Call me when you’re ready to have the big viewing. But before I go just remember that these are your friends. These are the people who have seen you through the good and the bad. And now that we’re going separate ways, we should treasure the good memories and not trash everybody…No matter how badly they treated us today. Just think about it and I’m sure you’ll make the right decision. (He walks out the door)
Marcus: Damn it all. He’s got a good point. Hmm…Do I keep the footage from today or do I spare my friends the humiliation? Guess it comes down to the coin flip. Okay. Heads, I keep the footage as is…Tails, I go with a much cheerier video. (Tosses the coin) Huh? Okay, I guess I’m doing that then. (Later that night)
Marisa: So where is the film master?
Todd: You’re looking at him.
Marisa: I said film master, not sleazy tabloid wannabe! (Sakura walks in)
Sakura: Sorry I’m late!
Misty: Are you finished with your speech.
Sakura: Sort of. Once I’m done here I’m going back to do some final editing.
Ash: We can’t wait to hear it!
Misty: Marisa, did you hear anything from Azalea?
Marisa: No. Not yet.
Todd: Okay, I think everybody is here so we can get started. I want to thank you all for agreeing to come tonight. I know some of you seem to be a little irritated with me and Marcus. (May raises her fist) Some more than others! But I just want to be the first to say that Marcus and I apologize for our actions today. (Marcus walks out)
Marcus: Todd, don’t apologize on my behalf. I know how hectic the day before Graduation is. I guess I just wanted to make a great video to remember you all by. See, I know that some of you will be going far away for college and maybe even the army…
Marisa: Marcus, I’m sorry for my behavior today.
Misty: Same here Marcus.
Sakura: We all are!
Marcus: Oh don’t worry it. All is forgiven! We were able to make a video even without the last minute run-arounds today. (Todd smiles)
Erika: So what are you waiting for? Play the damn video already! (Starts the video)
Misty: (Video footage at a pool) Oh my goodness, that was from when I was on the swim team!
Tracey: I didn’t know you were on the swim team.
Misty: I was for a little while.
Sakura: She only had one meet and she almost drowned.
Misty: That’s right! Ash and Brawly saved me when that happened. (Ash blushes)
Ash: Yeah, well, I just did what any decent person would have done. (A picture of Ash and Anabel kissing) Aah!
Todd: Oh my bad dude! I forgot that I took a picture of that.
Marcus: You also forgot that you gave me that picture.
May: Whoa! When did Ash kiss Anabel?
Marisa: One of Ash’s skeletons in the closet. Freshmen year, Homecoming dance.
Ash: Hey, she had her heart broken that night and I guess I cheered her up.
Misty: (Sarcastic) Gee, you think? (A picture of Gary and Marisa dancing) But Marisa, there’s one of your skeletons in your closet!
Marisa: TODD, YOU BUTT-HOLE!
Drew: You look like you were very happy!
Marisa: Yeah, I suppose that it was during a part of the night where that little pervert didn’t put his hands all over me! (Video footage of Ash and Misty at a football game)
Harley: Ooh, shake that ass!
Ash: Please don’t say that! (Sighs) The good old days of being the school mascot! I remember the first time I did that routine with Misty. (Misty giggles) I knew I could make you smile again!
Misty: (Scoffs) I’m still mad at you. (A picture of Shelly and Sakura)
Tracey: Who’s that?
Sakura: Shelly.
Misty: Back in our freshmen year, Sakura looked up to a girl named Shelly who was a bit of a rogue.
Sakura: Too bad things wound up getting out of control and Shelly's life was taken so soon. But, I know she really cared about me in the end. I miss her every day. (A picture of Drew surrounded by a bunch of women)
May: Well, what do we have here?
Brock: That pain-in-the-ass! One broken leg and the females at school swarm all over him like bees on honey.
Marisa: So dumbass over here thinks that if he breaks a bone in his body, he’ll get all of the pity from all of the females! But life has a funny way of screwing Brock Harrison.
Ash: Is that when Brock had to wear the eye-patch? (Brock screams)
Marcus: And I’ve got the picture right here! (A picture of Brock wearing an eye patch)
Brock: Which one of you sneaks took that picture?
Marcus: Well I didn’t take the picture and neither did Todd! It was really Marisa who took the picture, made duplicates, and sold them at $5 a pop.
Harley: Two things! One, why was he wearing an eye-patch? And two, do you still have anymore pictures left? He looks like a sexy pirate!
Marisa: It was an eye infection he got from one of his younger siblings, but he didn’t want to let anybody know about that. Oh and come by my house tomorrow. I’ll hook you up! (Brock groans)
Harley: Thank you darling. (A picture of Winona, Lanette, Wallace, Misty, Sakura, and Marisa)
Misty: Oh, now that takes me back!
Sakura: I’ll say!
Marisa: I miss Lanette, Wallace, and Winona.
May: So that’s Wallace! I must admit that he is cute! (Drew groans)
Marisa: Indeed. Wallace was one of the sweetest guys in school. I think that picture was from when Winona won the office of Student Body President.
Drew: I remember that! Her opponent got caught at a party with alcohol and drugs and was kicked off the ballot.
Brock: I bet you exposed that Marisa!
Marisa: I had nothing to do with that scandal. I actually never knew who rat Bill out. I guess it was Lanette or maybe the other office aid, Mary. (Marcus gives a nervous laugh)
Marcus: Well, what do we have here? (A picture of Tracey and Marisa)
Harley: How adorable!
Marisa: (Blushes) I bet that’s the only picture you have of the two of us together!
Marcus: You want to put money on that? (A picture of Harley and Tucker kissing)
Harley: Oh my!
May: IS HE WEARING A DRESS?
Drew: It was his Halloween costume and somehow both of them wore the same dress!
Harley: I could care less about that slut!
Marcus: But as of yesterday, you were happy to see Tucker home from college.
Harley: To tell you the truth, things just aren’t going as well as I originally thought. I thought that we could work out our long-distance relationship. Now that I’m going to college, it’s going to be no different from before. Since I’m going to the University here, I won’t see Tucker as much since he’s in a different town. (Tracey sighs)
Misty: Something wrong Tracey?
Tracey: No, just thinking. (A picture of Brock and Harley)
Brock: Ugh!
Harley: Oh, that was when we had that cute little project we got to do sophomore year and take care of a plastic baby! It was fun to be married to Brock for a few days. (Brock groans) Oh come now, you know you enjoyed it too.
Marisa: Oh yeah, that project! God, I hated that project!
Misty: Really? Was it because you had to work with Gary or was it because Tracey was working with my sister, Daisy?
Marisa: A little bit of the both if you want to get right down to it. (A picture of Marcus and Lovrina kissing)
Kelly: Why am I watching this?
Marisa: Yeah, who put the whore on?
Todd: You should have just deleted this in editing. That bitch just brought back too many bad memories. (A picture of Brock kissing Temaku)
Brock: IT BURNS!!!
Drew: Brock’s ex-girlfriend!
May: Brock had a girlfriend?
Brock: Good riddance! (Video footage of everybody dancing)
Misty: Prom night! (Gary and Sakura dancing)
Sakura: See Marisa, he was a perfect gentleman that night. (Gary strokes Sakura’s butt) I guess I never noticed that before or felt it. (Video footage of Guys & Dolls)
May: Finally, something that I’m in!
Erika: I have to admit, you and Drew were something else in that play. But of course, no match for me and Joshua! (Video footage of Harley at the piano)
Ash: Were you drunk?
Marcus: No, the only thing he was drinking was eggnog.
Ash: I only ask because he’s screwing up on a Christmas song and he has make-up on.
Grace: Well, when Harley passed out, Kelly and I decided to give him a little makeover.
Harley: I swear you girls made me look too cheap! (Video footage of Marisa and Tracey kissing)
Marcus: And here's the birth of this relationship! I’ll never forget them slow dancing.
Tracey: You saw that?
Marisa: Unfortunately.
Marcus: So if it wasn’t for me, you two probably wouldn’t have hooked up. I guess you’ll have to give me some major credit for this!
Marisa: Zip it Cupid! (A picture of the thespians)
Erika: Oh, that was from our concert last year. I swear to God, I never want to hear that song again!
Kelly: (Singing) Matchmaker, Matchmaker, make me a match…
Erika: Don’t do that again!
Narrator: Yes…and then they showed random pictures and video footage from their senior year. Oh, how nice it is to remember the good times. Oh wait…Is it over? It is? Okay, back to the chapter.
Todd: And that’s all folks!
Misty: That was beautiful, you guys.
Marcus: Well there you go, you guys. I guess now you can go back to hating our guts if you want to.
Marisa: What the hell have you been huffing? Did you completely ignore our apology? Besides, we all loved the video and are very sorry that we hurt your feelings today.
Marcus: I just wanted to make a little film to remember all of my friends since I know that some of you will be going away after graduation. Just something for me to go on before the ten-year reunion!
Marisa: We’ll always keep in touch Marcus, remember that!
Misty: As we go on…
Brock: We remember!
Sakura: All the times we…
Drew: Had together!
Tracey: And as our lives change…
Harley: Come whatever!
May: We will still be!
All: Friends forever!
Marisa: That was cute…and very creepy. Let’s never do that again.
Marcus: Thanks you guys! Well, we better get home and get to sleep. We have a big day tomorrow! (All agreeing)
Narrator: And so, everybody left Marcus’s house that night in a happier mood. All of the seniors were both anxious and excited for what was in store for tomorrow. But we’ve got more in store for the final chapter so stay tuned.
Song(s) used:
*Matchmaker from Fiddler on the Roof
*Graduation (Friends Forever) by Vitamin C