Embedded Files
The real, unequivocal end is here.
Home Depot is huge and Harmon is without a parental figure.
Home Depot is huge and Harmon is without a parental figure.
He's lost and afraid. Someone help this young man!
To escape the store before closing, Harmon must traverse the layers of the Home Depot.
To escape the store before closing, Harmon must traverse the layers of the Home Depot.
Layer 1 - Paint
Layer 1 - Paint
Traversing the Paint Aisle is treacherous, but the most tame of the aisles. He must avoid knocking over any tins of paint, as if he breaks it he buys it. He must also not get any on him otherwise an employee might spot him with their paint-based thermal vision.
Harmon is a very clumsy man. Getting through here was a challenge, nearly deadly.
Layer 2 - Lumber
Layer 2 - Lumber
The Lumber Aisle is where most Home Depot customers never return from. They are typically spotted by the men in flannel, and are believed to be turned into paper by them. Harmon did not get any paint on him in the last aisle meaning the lumberjacks could not see him in his orange camo.
Harmon knew what he was doing and got out of the lumber aisle alive.
Layer 3 - Housing
Layer 3 - Housing
The Housing Aisle is the middle point of this harrowing experience. Walking through the endless false walls and set-up rooms causes many to become lost in a maze of well-priced furniture, hunted down by the suburban dads perusing the area.
Harmon had been provided a map by a skilled Home Depot explorer, the one who had documented it all.
Layer 4 - Tools
Layer 4 - Tools
Tools is a deceptive aisle, appearing potentially normal, but nothing comes that easily. Little do the patrons know that purchasing any of HOME DEPOT's cheap and efficient tools would result in certain demise, but the deals are just too good for most to resist.
Harmon is a frugal man. He does not wish to buy anything but what he needs.
Layer 5 - Electrical
Layer 5 - Electrical
Harmon's odyssey continues through the Electrical Aisle, a place where the survival rate is as little 1%. He cleared himself of all metal, not purchasing any of the alluring tools he saw in the previous aisle. He must survive the hazards of this dimly lit hellscape beyond our comprehension.
Harmon narrowly survived this one. He just has one more to go. We pray for him.
Layer 6 - Outdoors
Layer 6 - Outdoors
The Outdoors is not actually outside, rather a pocket dimension of the Home Depot. It is where the hellish machinations of the previous layers have all crawled out of, birthing Mr. Home Depot himself. Here is where Harmon must complete the ritual to escape with his life.
Harmon knew the ritual by heart. Mr. Home Depot was pleased. Harmon's journey had been a success.
Unfortunately for Harmon, he forgot the very thing he went there to buy, a new couch.
Unfortunately for Harmon, he forgot the very thing he went there to buy, a new couch.
Report abuse