The Villain

"The Villain" is a mindless take-off of the Wile E. Coyote/Road Runner cartoons starring Kirk Douglas as the titular anti-hero, a Black Bart type named Cactus Jack Slade. Aided by his mistrustful black stallion Whiskey, Cactus Jack is out to foil The Handsome Stranger (Arnold Schwarzenegger), who's accompanying the voluptuous Charming Jones (Ann Margret) and her father's fortune to their final destination. Unfortunately for Cactus Jack, all of his plans seem to have been ripped straight from the Acme handbook. And unfortunately for the horny Charming, the Handsome Stranger is either gay or merely asexually oblivious to her neverending advances.

I'm the first to admit "The Villain" is not a great movie. There's virtually no story, a few of the gags don't work, there were countless missed opportunities, Paul Lynde was painfully unfunny (in his final film) as a very un-PC eunuch Indian, and the ending is too abrupt and off-the-wall. Critics savaged it, audiences ignored it, and it debuted on network TV less than a year after its theatrical release -- pretty rare for films to jump to TV so quickly in those days.

But at the same time, there's something downright endearing about the flick. Kirk Douglas (in his first comedy) absolutely devours the scenery. In a 1979 interview he said, "I doubt that many producers or directors would have pictured me in the role. I'm not even sure that I would have thought of me." Maybe the reason he's so damned good in the part is precisely because he was the unlikely choice... though he was continuously upstaged by the eight stallions who played Whiskey. Almost equally as good as Douglas was Margret, who'd perfected the role of the nymphette years before accepting this role.

Schwarzenegger, meanwhile, was still very green as an actor, but that kind of worked to his advantage as the hapless Handsome Stranger. Donning a form-fitting, powder-blue cowboy outfit and sporting his trademarked accent, the over-buffed former Mr. Universe was the antithesis of a celluloid western hero. Not a bad thing in a movie that was never intended to be taken seriously.

Also noteworthy are the visuals. In addition to goofy runaway boulder and painted-tunnel sight gags, the film was beautifully framed to take advantage of the Arizona landscape. And I'd be very surprised if the crew escaped the abundant stuntwork unscathed.

It's really a shame that this little movie's been neglected by the studio. The region 1 DVD is open matte rather than its original widescreen ratio (normally I wouldn't complain about that, but the framing seems off numerous times) and there's no extras whatsoever. This is a film that would benefit from the insight of the cast and crew -- who all seemed to be having a grand old time making it.

But perhaps the biggest travesty is that there's never been a soundtrack. Bill Justis created a western-comedy score that was practically perfect in every way, and Mel Tillis (who had a small role) sang theme songs for the three lead characters. It's a damned shame.