Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because he felt crummy.
Why was the baby strawberry crying?
Because her mom and dad were in a jam.
What did the little corn say to the mama corn?
Where is pop corn?
How do you make a lemon drop?
Just let it fall.
What did the limestone say to the geologist?
Don’t take me for granite.
Why does a seagull fly over the sea?
Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a baygull.
What kind of water can’t freeze?
Hot water.
What kind of tree fits in your hand?
A palm tree.
What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore.
What is fast, loud and crunchy?
A rocket chip.
Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert?
Because she was stuffed.
What has ears but cannot hear?
A cornfield.
What did the left eye say to the right eye?
Between us, something smells.
What did one plate say to the other plate?
Dinner is on me.
Why did the student eat his homework?
Because the teacher told him it was a piece of cake.
When you look for something, why is it always in the last place you look?
Because when you find it, you stop looking.
What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses?
A coconut on vacation.
What do you say to a rabbit on its birthday?
Hoppy Birthday.
What’s the one thing will you get every year on your birthday, guaranteed?
A year older.
Why do candles always go on the top of cakes?
Because it’s hard to light them from the bottom.
What do cakes and baseball teams have in common?
They both need a good batter.
What goes up but never comes down?
Your age.
What does every birthday end with?
The letter Y.
What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday?
It’s roar birthday.
Why did the girl put her cake in the freezer?
She wanted to ice it.
Does a green candle burn longer than a pink one?
No, they both burn shorter.
Why did the little girl hit her birthday cake with a hammer?
It was a pound cake.
Why couldn’t the pony sing a lullaby?
She was a little horse.
What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon.
Why don’t elephants chew gum?
They do, just not in public.
What did the banana say to the dog?
Bananas can’t talk.
How do you make an octopus laugh?
With ten-tickles.
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bull-dozer.
How do you fit more pigs on a farm?
Build a sty-scraper.
What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk?
An udder failure.
What do you call a cow that won’t give milk?
A milk dud.
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.
What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk.
Where do polar bears vote?
The North Poll
What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?
Ouch!
Why did the snake cross the road?
To get to the other ssside.
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in schools.
What did the ocean say to the pirate?
Nothing, it just waved.
Why don’t pirates shower before they walk the plank?
Because they’ll just wash up on shore later.
What happened when Bluebeard fell overboard in the Red Sea?
He got marooned.
How did the pirate get his flag so cheaply?
He bought it on sail.
What has 8 legs, 8 arms, and 8 eyes?
8 pirates.
How much does it cost a pirate to get his ears pierced?
About a buck an ear.
Why is pirating so addictive?
They say once ye lose yer first hand, ye get hooked.
How do pirates know that they are pirates?
They think, therefore they arrr.
Why are cats good at video games?
Because they have nine lives.
What did the cat say when he fell off the table?
“Me-ow.”
What is the difference between a cat that got photocopied and a cat that follows you?
One is a cat copy; the other is a copy cat.
What do you get when you cross a ball and a cat?
A fur ball.
What’s a cat’s favorite magazine?
A cat-alogue.
What cat likes living in water?
An octo-puss.
Why didn’t the skeleton go to school?
His heart wasn’t in it.
How does a vampire start a letter?
Tomb it may concern…
What is a monster’s favorite dessert?
I scream.
What monster plays tricks on Halloween?
Prank-enstein.
What kind of music do mummies love?
Wrap music.
What fruit do scarecrows love the most?
Straw-berries.
What does a witch use to do her hair?
Scarespray.
What room does a ghost not need?
A living room.
What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A blood hound.
What is a ghost’s nose full of?
Boo-gers.
What do birds say on Halloween?
Trick or tweet.
Are black cats bad luck?
Sure, if you’re a mouse.
funny jokes in english for friends
jokes in english for adults
100 funny jokes
funny jokes in english for girl
funny jokes for adults
funny jokes in hindi
joke of the day
very funny jokes in english for whatsapp
very funny jokes in english for students
very funny jokes in english for friends
very funny jokes in english short
very funny jokes in english urdu
very funny jokes in english for adults
very funny jokes in english video