EPISODE 27

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LAMORAK : 

Percival!

Bloody fucking⎯

Oh, my lord.


ARTHUR : 

Lamorak.


LAMORAK : 

Have you been training alone again?

You’re going to be late for the feast.


ARTHUR : 

Kay’s already reminding me of his schedule all the time,

I won’t stand to have my own knights on my case on top of it. 

Besides, it is the privilege of kings to always be on time.

Where are you going with that look on your face? And dressed like that?


LAMORAK : 

I’m looking for Percival, he…

We need to talk. 


ARTHUR : 

Percival? I showed him to the kitchens, Kay’s waiting for him there.

Whatever happened, you need to calm down first and foremost.

Go and get ready, you’ll probably see him at the feast.


LAMORAK : 

Right.

See you tonight, my lord. 


[ lamorak stomps off in a huff ]


ARTHUR : 

How cold…

It’s okay, he’s gone.

I don’t know what happened, but that was a close call.


PERCIVAL : 

Why…

did you help me hide?


ARTHUR : 

Because I too have a temperamental big brother.

I would’ve given anything to be able to hide, when I was your age.

Given my build, though, you can understand how it was easier said than done. 


[ So tall. ] 


PERCIVAL :

…My lord.

Have you made up your mind regarding the Grail quest?


ARTHUR : 

So eager!

You’ll know tonight. 

…It’s been weighing on your mind, hasn’t it? Do you feel responsible for it?


PERCIVAL : 

It’s my fault that the Grail doesn’t have a guardian anymore.

If it’s no longer confined to Corbenic,

if Britain becomes barren…

I wish I could fix my mistake, 

but I’m only a squire. 


ARTHUR : 

I doubt you’re the only one responsible, Percival. 

Such situations are always complicated, and require some time to consider. 

…This said,

you probably don’t know how I became king, do you?


[ percy shakes his head no ]


ARTHUR : 

Follow me. 

I was a bit younger than you are now,

and Kay’s squire.

If you find him unpleasant now,

you can’t imagine how much he improved with age.

At the time, the kingdom of Logres was without a ruler,

and Camelot had been abandoned after the death of its king. 

After years of infighting over these lands, Merlin stepped in.

He decreed that a tourney would determine who the next ruler would be. 

To get one’s hands on Camelot and Logres through nothing more than a tourney?

It was a golden opportunity. 

The whole of Britain’s nobility came to attend.

Ector, Kay’s father, was determined to put his son on the throne.

We traveled all the way from Escavalon,

and mingled at the festivities as we waited for the tourney to begin.

With the hour fast approaching, I was horrified to realize

that I’d forgotten Kay’s sword at our inn.

As a regular squire, it would’ve been an unfortunate mistake. But as Kay’s squire? 

I ran to find a replacement.

And that’s where I found it,

thrust into the stone.

I pulled it out without thinking, then brought it to Kay. 

That sword was Excalibur,

a blade marked by magic,

that had been planted there by Uther Pendragon, the former king of Logres. 

It was meant only for a descendant of his own blood, and more specifically⎯

to the one meant to unify the isle of Britain. 

Well, that’s enough monologuing for tonight. 

Kay’s going to pull both our ears if we don’t go and get ready.

He must be waiting for you in the kitchens.

But keep this in mind, young Welshman.

The unification of Britain, the Round Table, the purging of our lands from the giants that plagued it…

It all began

because I made a mistake as a squire. 


[ percy is awed!! ]


PERCIVAL : 

( It’s not a lost cause yet.

Even if… 

I still hope he’ll announce the start of the quest tonight. )


ARTHUR : 

Knights, gentlemen, fair ladies, one and all, 

please enjoy this feast.

I’ll wait until everyone is more or less soused to make my more unfortunate announcements. 

[ everyone laughs ]

Also, please show some consideration for Sir Kay,

whose efforts allowed this feast to happen in the first place. 

Please grant him this one night of rest and recreation.


KAY : 

It’s a nice way of saying that the first one to make me get up again once I’ve settled down is gonna to regret it. 


ARTHUR : 

Let the celebrations begin!


KAY : 

You, hold it.

Look at me for a second.

…That’s what I thought. You don’t even have it in you to talk back anymore. 

Go put that back in the kitchen, you’re off duty. I don’t want you spilling anything on my guests.


PERCIVAL : 

But what am I supposed to do with my evening, then?


KAY : 

I don’t give a shit, kid. Make of it what you will.

C’mon, off with you. 


[ sound of giggling ]


?? : 

Oh, Sir Gawain… <3 

Oh!


GAWAIN : 

…You just ruined my moment.

That’s not very nice of you, you know. 


PERCIVAL : 

Maybe the kitchens aren’t the best place to mess around in.


GAWAIN : 

Ah! Touché.

You’ve grown more confident since the first time I saw you. 

And here comes the silence.

Is that wariness I see on your face? 

Are you wondering whether your brothers are right to fear me? To think me unworthy of their trust? 

Let me answer that, then.

They’re right. I killed Pellinore, your father.

Out of pure will for vengeance. 

So, in a way, I do understand how you feel.

I too had to look my father’s killer in the eye. That said, maybe you’re a bit luckier than I was.

Thanks to your father, you’ve only got the one eye to look at. 


PERCIVAL : 

I don’t hold any hard feelings towards you, Sir Gawain. 

I never knew Pellinore. I don’t care.

If my brothers want to wallow in their resentment and their wish for revenge… 

That’s their problem.

To be honest…

You’ve been more understanding towards me than they have.


GAWAIN : 

…That’s possible.

But don’t be too hard on them.

After all, it’s my fault they led such a difficult life.

[ sigh ] 

…Well.

I understand why Mordred seems to like you so much.

There isn’t an ounce of guile in those eyes. 

It’ll be good for him.

Be kind to him, will you? 


PERCIVAL : 

Yes…? 


NARRATION : 

I’m

exhausted.

If I can ignore all these people long enough, I can get to bed. 

But I want to know if the quest will⎯


?? : 

Oh!

Sorry, I⎯


GALAHAD : 

Percival! 

It’s been so long! 


PERCIVAL : 

Oh…

Galahad! 


?? : 

Arthur Pendragon…



ROUND TABLE TRIVIA 

A constable’s job is basically to look after the war horses.

Bedivere is responsible for Arthur’s army, and for solving conflicts between knights.


NPC : 

is complaining about some other knight


This task requires great patience and listening skills, which Bedivere…


Bedivere : 

( I really, really could not give less of a fuck. )


…does not always possess. 



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