EPISODE 18

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BREUSE

Sorry, big boy, you’ll get some oats in Edinburgh.
Well,
if I have enough money to buy ‘em, that is.
“Aw, why are you broke, Sir Breuse?”
Thanks for asking!
I blew it all on bets and games.

That said, if we get paid in Edinburgh, it should cover the cost of⎯

Wh⎯


TRISTAN :

I see…
… that you're still in the habit of talking to your horse, Breuse.

BREUSE

And? You talk to Dinadan.
At least my horse doesn’t enjoy taking me for a fool.

DINADAN

True, if you enjoyed being contradicted,
word would’ve gotten around.

BREUSE

… Oh?
Is this a trap? Is that what’s going on here?

DINADAN

Don’t play dumb, it’s one of the few flaws you don’t have.
You knew we’d come here.

BREUSE

It’s true that I was waiting for you.
Good job stealing the hound off me, kid.

TRISTAN

You’ve got a choice to make here, Breuse.
You can give us that shield without a fuss and be free to go…
… or we can do this the hard way.

BREUSE


Come on, Tristan, we both know I won’t fight you.
And you’re too honest, too noble to force me into it.
So what, is it gonna be Dinadan? You want payback for last time?

DINADAN

Oh, you don't know jack about me, Breuse.
I don’t do revenge.
But you’ve been pretty churlish with our Welsh friend here.

BREUSE

Oh, shrimpy wants a rematch?
He can⎯

DINADAN

Along with Mordred.

BREUSE



DINADAN

What, not feeling up to the task after all?
Or is it something else?

BREUSE

… No.

But if I thrash them, Tristan’ll be up next, no?
There’s nothing in it for me.

TRISTAN

If you put the shield in the game, I won’t intervene.
You have my word as a knight.

BREUSE

… If that’s all it takes to make you happy.

TRISTAN

Don’t be afraid.
You’ve trained for this,
and you’re stronger than you think.
I trust you wholeheartedly. (Go!)

BREUSE

… Come on, get in here,
and let’s finish this.
[ making a come-hither motion ]

[ mordred and percy exchange a glance + nod ]


BREUSE : 

Ah!

MORDRED

PERCIVAL!

BREUSE

You’ve resourceful, I’ll give you that.
But you’re only squires, in the end.

PERCIVAL

Shut up, cont gwirion!

TRISTAN

Oh, Percival, don’t hit him!

PERCIVAL :

Huh?

TRISTAN

Knights don’t use their fists in combat! And watch your tongue.

( I’ve heard Lamorak say it often enough to know that was a bad, bad word. )

MORDRED

Don’t let down your guard, it’s not over.
The two of us can⎯


BREUSE

Time out!
… I give up.


PERCIVAL

How do you⎯

BREUSE

I’ve had enough of this.
I’m hungry, and I’ve got too much on my plate not to slip up and get hurt. So I'm out.
It was enlightening, but I have better things to do, like selling off this shield.

PERCIVAL

Wait, you… you bet out the shield, you can’t just take it.

BREUSE

You just don’t learn, huh?
My name's not “Breuse Goodman”, is it? 


PERCIVAL :

I’m gonna⎯

BREUSE

You're gonna attack me?
While I’m weaponless and defenseless?
That’s not very knightly of you, you know.

TRISTAN

… He’s right.
Attacking a weaponless knight goes against the chivalric code.


PERCIVAL

But then…
What are we going to do?


BREUSE

Aah, I’ve got to admit, I do love that code. 

It relies on the assumption that every knight is in possession of a noble soul, so much…
… that finding loopholes in it is way too easy.

TRISTAN

Din⎯


DINADAN :

I’m sick and tired of watching him prance around without any fear of retribution.

So leave it to me.

BREUSE

Aw, Din…
Sometimes I really do feel sorry that we’re on such bad terms. Our common roots should help us bond, no?

DINADAN :

I don’t use my status as a knight for opportunistic means.
So quit it, I have no sympathy to spare for you.

BREUSE

… Having a war hero for a father does change a lot of things, huh?

DINADAN

And yours being a sore loser is way too good of an excuse.

BREUSE

You’re not going to let me go, are you?

DINADAN

You cause too much trouble to be allowed to go free, Breuse.

BREUSE

I see. That’s a real shame.
See, I was starting to like this horse.

TRISTAN

Din, get back!
Get the kids to safety, I’ll handle this!

DINADAN

On your own?!
You’re nuts!

TRISTAN

Do as I tell you!


DINADAN

Tristan, wait!
You two, get behind the treeline!
Come on!

??

Look who’s there.
In a hurry, are we?

BREUSE :

Well, shit.
If I told you I’ve missed you, would you believe me?
… My dear Gawain.

GAWAIN

What were you going to do with my horse?

BREUSE

Sorry, I thought it was Tristan’s.

GAWAIN

Oh?
Tristan’s here, is he?


ROUND TABLE TRIVIA 

Tristan patched up Percival’s sleeve.


Percival : 

Oh, that’s real nice work, sir, do you sew often?

Tristan : 

Oh, yes! I learned by sewing up my own wounds! :) 


Dinadan also knows how to sew.


Dinadan : 

I learned by keeping Tristan from sewing up his own wounds.



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