EPISODE 11
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TRISTAN :
Wait for it.
He got out of his house in breeches, sword in hand,
ready to slice me to pieces.
And that was the first time I saw your father, Percival.
Needless to say, he made quite the impression.
He was so small, but he was ready to go for my throat.
DINADAN :
Maybe that’s all he could reach, Tristan.
TRISTAN :
Din!
DINADAN :
What? Even Lamorak’s taller, isn’t he?
TRISTAN :
Ah, yes, Pellinore just about reached my chin.
Lamorak… is what, this tall?
DINADAN :
Oh, I remember how Pellinore looked standing next to Kay, it was hilarious.
You’ve seen Kay, haven’t you, Percival?
PERCIVAL :
Um, no.
DINADAN :
What? You stayed in Camelot for weeks and didn’t see Kay?
TRISTAN :
The seneschal himself and his legendary bad temper?
DINADAN :
Imagine not knowing Kay.
TRISTAN :
A peaceful existence…
DINADAN :
To be honest, I’d miss him.
TRISTAN :
Me too! <3
What about Arthur, then? You know the guy?
You haven’t seen Arthur either?
How come?
PERCIVAL :
I⎯ I had a hard time adjusting to life in the city.
Every time I got out, it put me in such a sorry state…
So I spent most of my time indoors,
except for training, when Lamorak dragged me out.
DINADAN :
Did your staying indoors not bother Aglovale?
PERCIVAL :
I think he saw it as an opportunity to teach me. He told me about you, Sir Tristan.
TRISTAN :
Oh, and what did he say?
PERCIVAL :
That you were an exceptionally good fighter.
That you and Lancelot
were the best knights of the Round Table.
TRISTAN :
Aww, but that’s adorable!
PERCIVAL :
And also!
That it was no small feat for a Cornish knight.
TRISTAN :
Aww, that’s less adorable.
Din, I am being mocked.
DINADAN :
Fair’s fair.
TRISTAN :
But… ?
DINADAN :
You spend your time dressing up as a mystery knight just so you can fight anyone and everyone.
TRISTAN :
You’re just mad at me because I wanted to fight you.
DINADAN :
As good a reason as any, no?
TRISTAN :
What about you, Mordred?
You’re Gawain’s brother, aren’t you?
Have we met?
MORDRED :
… At the tourney in Lothian, last year.
TRISTAN :
Ah, yes! Gawain performed splendidly, as I recall, she⎯
MORDRED :
Tell me…
TRISTAN :
Hm?
MORDRED :
Why aren’t we at the castle?
Isn’t it odd to sleep outside while we're on watch?
TRISTAN :
On watch?
I’m not keeping any watch.
I’m after a stolen shield that I must⎯
…
Din, what did you tell them?
DINADAN :
I, uh,
might have lied,
just a little bit.
PERCIVAL :
You lied?
MORDRED :
But why?!
DINADAN :
Because I knew that if I told Gawain and Aglovale we were going on any other kind of quest, they would never have let you go.
Percy, you’ve barely started training,
and as for you, Momo, Gawain is way protective for some reason.
I had to look her in the eye and lie to her.
The moment we get back, I’m a dead man.
MORDRED :
She’s not protective.
DINADAN :
Hm?
…
TRISTAN :
Well, in any case,
the king of Corbenic asked me to find a magic shield stolen from him by an unscrupulous guest,
called the Perilous Shield.
PERCIVAL :
Why Perilous?
TRISTAN :
Oh, according to the king,
there’s a one in two chance you’ll die if you use it.
DINADAN, PERCIVAL, MORDRED :
What?
TRISTAN :
Because it’s engraved with ancient magic, apparently. And the older it is, the more powerful it gets.
DINADAN :
Do you have any leads?
TRISTAN :
I even have a near-certain one.
While going around the nearby cities, I gathered that an illegal tourney was to take place near Leeds next week.
The prize is supposed to be a very special shield,
worth a fortune.
And the Perilous Shield, if only because of its magical properties, is an item of rare worth indeed.
So it’s not hard to believe
that if someone looking to strike gold got their hands on it,
he could’ve gotten a very good price out of it by selling it to the sheriff of Leeds.
So, we’re heading for Leeds first thing tomorrow. I assume we’re all in agreement?
DINADAN :
I can see you coming from leagues away, Tristan.
We’re not taking part in that tourney, got it?
TRISTAN :
Don’t worry, I already have a plan!
I promise it doesn’t include taking part in the tourney.
DINADAN :
Say, Tristan…
… Was the city already this deserted last time you were here?
TRISTAN :
Well, it was already very quiet, but…
… not deserted.
DINADAN :
Let’s go set up our horses in the stables and put our armor on.
I’ve got a bad feeling about this.
…
There are a lot of horses here, for a deserted city.
TRISTAN :
Especially since not that many people live here.
People are leaving because the king has let these lands go to waste for decades,
according to last week’s gossip, anyway.
DINADAN :
So the tourney’s meant to fill the city’s coffers?
TRISTAN :
Or the sheriff’s pockets.
PERCIVAL :
Sir Tristan…
TRISTAN :
Hm?
PERCIVAL :
You have several suits of armor.
TRISTAN :
Ah, yes. Fetch me the Round Table’s plate, please.
Get the breastplate ready and I’ll put on the rest.
PERCIVAL :
Okay!
TRISTAN :
Say, Percival,
aren’t you curious to see what the tourney has to offer?
PERCIVAL :
( rub rub )
… I don’t know what a tourney is.
TRISTAN :
Oh, you’ve never seen one?
Each kingdom holds a yearly tourney, though.
Warriors from all over Britain come there to measure themselves up to one another.
There’s a ton of feasts and different events.
PERCIVAL :
Why is this one illegal, then?
TRISTAN :
Long story short, it’s because it wasn’t organized by the local king.
So, most of the time, such tourneys are held in secret and run on illegal gambling.
You know, you should take part in a tourney!
An official one, of course.
There’s a category for squires,
and you’re a pretty good shot.
With a bit of training with a sword, you’d do just fine.
PERCIVAL :
I… don’t think I have it in me.
I can’t even manage to have a good stance.
You’ve seen it, I keep losing my balance.
TRISTAN :
… Have you ever wielded other weapons before?
PERCIVAL :
Oh, yes!
I’ve always used javelins for hunting.
I found using those a lot easier, to be honest.
TRISTAN :
That’s what I thought.
You keep shifting back into a stance better suited for throwing weapons, facing the side,
which is really impractical for the usual techniques.
Just like me!
I was an archer before I was a swordsman,
and I’m self-taught.
So I don’t have the best posture out there,
but I managed fine as I was, didn’t I?
PERCIVAL :
More than fine, sir.
TRISTAN :
I could show you, if you wanted.
Once this quest is over and done with, that is.
The two of us can train together then!
PERCIVAL :
Oh…
Yes, it’d be my pleasure!
TRISTAN :
Alright then, Percival!
I’m ready!
(hug)
Aww, Percival!
That’s adorable, but…
I meant you should help me put the breastplate on.
PERCIVAL :
Wh-what?
I, I⎯ I⎯
DINADAN :
Aww, Percy’s already been adopted.
I was gonna bet it’d take a few more days..
Well, aren’t you even grumpier than usual, Momo.
( If you want a hug too, all you have to do is ask. )
MORDRED :
Stop calling me that.
Quit the kindly mentor act, too.
I’m not your squire,
and from what I’ve seen, you have nothing to teach me.
You’re not a knight worth your title.
So no, I don’t want to talk to you, Dinadan.
DINADAN :
… I see.
I suppose a knight worth their title
should be the type to let you languish on the sidelines
rather than bring you on a quest.
MORDRED :
How dare you⎯
Ah!
?? :
Knights of the Round table,
by the powers vested in me as sheriff,
you’re under arrest.
And I would advise you to cooperate.
I wouldn’t want to get blood in the cell I saved for you.
ROUND TABLE TRIVIA
Tourneys generally serve as training for wartime, but they’re also wide-scale, very popular shows in which every knight is looking to prove their worth and impress the crowd.
Tristan is a big tourney fan, but he very often takes part as an anonymous masked knight.
Tristan :
“I prefer not to let my opponent know to expect me!”
Dinadan prefers the tourneys’ opening and closing feasts… but he also holds his own just fine in the fights.
Lamorak is in a class of his own and rounds up all the prizes. Though he doesn’t win every single tourney, he’s always in the semi-finals.
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