Sunday Family Humour 17th November Page 2
Sunday Family Humour 17th November Page 2
Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour
HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR 2030 (Australia)
Thanks to Captain Bob
Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh-largest country in the world, Little India , formerly known as Australia ......
Tasmania executes last remaining Greenie
...
White minorities still trying to have English recognised as Australia's third language
...
Children from 2-parent heterosexual families bullied in schools for being 'different' --
Tolerance urged.
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Gay marriages now overtake heterosexual marriages as preferred 'lifestyle' choice
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Kookaburra and platypus plague threatens Australian crops and livestock
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Melbourne schoolgirl expelled for not wearing burqa -- being Christian is no excuse, says school: Sharia law must be enforced
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Japan announces it will no longer consume whale meat as whales are now extinct and the scientific research fleet is unemployed; Australian tells Japan cane toads taste like whale meat
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Australia now has 10 universities of political correctness. Professor Goldman of ANU says there is still a long way to go in the fight to stop people saying what they think
...
Australian deficit $10 trillion and rising; Govt declares return to surplus in 100 years -- 300 years ahead of schedule. PM Mohammed Yousuf claims increased growth through more immigration is the secret to success
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Wall Street banks merge to form new super bank, Goldman Rothschild Ebeneezer Epstein Drescher (GREED): Huge bonuses paid to executives to celebrate launch
...
Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.
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Iran still quarantined; physicists estimate it will take 10 years for radioactivity to decrease to safe level
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France pleads for global help after being taken over by Islamic countries -- no nation steps forward. Serves them right.
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Castro dies aged 104; Cuban cigars can now be imported to US legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned smoking
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Jose Manuel Rodrigez Bush says he will run for second term as US president in 2032.
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Australia Post raises price of stamps to $18 and cuts deliveries to Wednesdays only.
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Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in VicIndia and New South Iraq.
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Senate still blocks drilling in Canberra as petrol hits 5000 rupees a litre and petrol stations are open only on Tuesdays and Fridays
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Supreme Court rules punishing criminals violates their civil rights: victims to share responsibility for crime
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New law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers be registered by January 2035 as lethal weapons
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Australian Tax Office cuts tax rate to 75 per cent -- lowest in decades
...
FANTASTIC ENGINEERING PHOTOS
Thanks to David M.
SHOOTER the ELK to the RESCUE
Thanks to David M.
Who says animals don't have intellegence and emotions. Heaven save us.
Zookeepers at Pocatello Zoo, Idaho , were worried when they noticed Shooter, a four-year-old elk, acting strangely at his water trough. Baffled, they watched as the animal - who is so massive some keepers are afraid to even enter his enclosure - tried to dip his hooves into his drinking trough, before attempting to dunk his whole head in the water. But they were amazed as 10 ft tall Shooter lifted his head from the trough clutching a tiny marmot - a kind of large squirrel - between his jaws.
Mammoth: Shooter the elk stands 10ft tall from his hooves to the tip of his antlers
To the rescue! Shooter pulls the hapless marmot from his water trough.
The gentle giant placed the hapless rodent down and nudged it with his hoof, as if checking it for signs of life, before calmly watching it scamper off into the bushes.
Zoo staff caught the entire rescue on camera.
He was trying to dunk his head in the water, but his antlers kept getting in the way.
Nobody could figure out why he was trying to get his head in, and then he started dipping his feet in. We were all completely confused, until we saw the marmot in his mouth.
I think he had nudged the animal away from the edge of the bucket with his antlers and hooves so he could reach it with his mouth without his antlers getting in the way. It was very sweet.
Down you go: Shooter gently lowers the tiny rodent to the ground
Safe, but soaked: Somewhat shell shocked, the lucky marmot seems happy to be back on dry land Zoo keeper
Dr Joy Fox added: We think Shooter sensed that the animal was in distress and decided to help. He spent quite a bit of time planning how to grab it. The zoo plans to auction off Shooter's incredible antlers when they are shed later in the year.
Drug Experiment on Spiders (funny)
Thanks to Ray O'.
Various Old Photos
The Incredible Frost Flower
Thanks to David M.
It is as beautiful as it is rare. A frost flower is created
on autumn or early winter mornings when ice
in extremely thin layers is pushed out from the stems
of plants or occasionally wood.
This extrusion creates wonderful patterns which curl
and fold into gorgeous frozen petals giving
this phenomenon both its name and its appearance.
Conditions have to be just so for frost flowers to form.
Early winter is the optimum time to come across them
... as although the weather conditions must be freezing,
it is vital that the ground is not, so that water can be
sucked up in the stem.
As the temperature gets to freezing or just below
...the sap in the stem of the plants will expand.
As it does so, the outer layer of the stem comes under
increasing pressure, and microscopically thin cracks,
known as linear fissures, begin to form. These will
finally give way under the pressure of the sap and split open.
forming cracks for the water to come out through ...
and then freeze
Water is continuously being drawn up the plants
stem while the ground remains unfrozen.
It travels up the plant stem and reaches the split or splits.
As it does so, it oozes slowly out and freezes.
Yet more water is coming behind it....
This new water reaches the cracks and it too freezes,
pushing the previous slither of ice away from the stem.
And in this manner the amazing 'petals' that you see
in these pictures are formed.
Incredibly, the frost flower effect can happen to wood
even when it has been made in to a fence or a gate,
as seen above. In this case the water is extruded through
the pores in the wood.
If you come across one - be careful.
Rather than attempt to pick it up, if you have a camera
or a phone with you ... take a picture instead.
Frost flowers are incredibly delicate and will more often
than not ... shatter when touched.
Not only that, as they are made of such thin sheets
of ice, they will melt away as the sun rises higher
in the sky.
You may get frost flowers again the following day,
but unless the conditions are just right ...
the chances are... your first glimpse may be your last.
Cute Dogs
Why it's good to be tall!
Can I keep it?
I can't wait till they deliver the new stove!
Bake for 20 minutes and then turn over...
Everybody needs a good sleep toy!
Frankly, I don't think it's funny!
I'm ready for my walk!
I love my new human!
Always check before putting on your shoes!
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