Sunday Family Humour 1st June

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

DIVORCE SETTLEMENT

Thanks to Alex

On the first day, he sadly packed his belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, he had the movers come and collect his things.

On the third day, he sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining-room table, by candle-light; he put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp,
a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water.


When he'd finished, he went into each and every room
and deposited a few half-eaten shrimps dipped in caviar
into the hollow center of the curtain rods.


He then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

On the fourth day, the wife came back with her new boyfriend, and at first all was bliss.

Then, slowly, the house began to smell.

They tried everything; cleaning, mopping, and airing-out the place.

Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned.

Air fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which time the two had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked! People stopped coming over to visit.


Repairmen refused to work in the house. The maid quit.

Finally, they couldn't take the stench any longer, and decided
they had to move, but a month later - even though they'd cut
their price in half - they couldn't find a buyer for such a stinky house.

Word got out, and eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, unable to wait any longer for a purchaser,
they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.


Then the ex-called the woman and asked how things were going.
She told him the saga of the rotting house.

He listened politely and said that he missed his old home terribly and would be willing to reduce his divorce settlement in exchange for having the house.


Knowing he could have no idea how bad the smell really was,
she agreed on a price that was only 1/10th of what the house had been worth
.... but only if he would sign the papers that very day.


He agreed, and within two hours her lawyers delivered the completed paperwork.

A week later the woman and her boyfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home
...and just to spite the ex-husband, they even took the curtain rods !!!


I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU...?


One heckuva jump

Thanks to David M.

     If you've ever been in freefall you'll find this to be exhilarating, to say the least.

    After about a minute you will see the altimeter and the airspeed indicator come on the screen.
    Watch the speed, and his rate of descent. You will be amazed at what you see.
  
   24+ miles above the surface of the Earth......

    THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE AND THE PHOTOGRAPHY IS BREATHTAKING.
    
    Hold your breath and watch this, also watch the odometer as the speed increases and then decreases as he enters the earth’s atmosphere. What a view!
    
    First-Person-View Of Felix Baumgartner's Space Jump

Felix Baumgartner's Space Jump


Ways to Show You're a Real Man

Thanks to David M,

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 1
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 2

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 3
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 4

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 5
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 6

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 7
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 8

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 9
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 11

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 10
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 12

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 13
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 14

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 15
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 16

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 17
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 18

 
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 19
   
Ways to Show You're a Real Man 20



To receive the weekly link to the latest Sunday Family humour,
send an email to dgwest7@gmail.com
saying subscribe Sunday Family Humour.

No costs, nothing else needed. Welcome and thank you.

Dogs saying Grace Before Dinner

Thanks to David M.

grace before dinner.mp4



Black Bear Quins

Thanks to Paula Stan
once in a lifetime photo  

Black  bears typically have two cubs; rarely, one or three. In  2007, in northern New 
Hampshire , a black bear sow  gave birth to five healthy young. There were two or  
 
three reports of sows with as many as 4 cubs, but five  was, and is, very extraordinary.  
The photographer  learned of them shortly after they emerged from their  den and set a goal of 
photographing all five cubs  with their mom - no matter how much time and 
effort  was involved. He knew the trail they followed on a  fairly regular 
basis, usually shortly before dark.  After spending nearly four hours a 
day, seven days a  week, for more than six weeks, he had that  
once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and photographed  them. He used the 
equivalent of a very fast film  speed on his digital camera. The print is 
properly  focused and well exposed, with all six bears posing as  if they 
were in a studio for a family portrait.  
 

bears 1


The  photographer stayed in touch with other people who saw  the bears during 
the summer and into the fall  hunting season. All six bears continued to 
thrive.  As time for hibernation approached, he found still more  folks 
who had seen them, and everything remained OK.  The photographer stayed 
away from the bears because  he was concerned that they might become 
habituated  to him, or to people in general, and treat them as  
approachable friends. This could easily become  dangerous for both man 
and animal. 

After  Halloween, no further reports and could only hope the  bears survived 
until they hibernated. This spring,  just before the snow disappeared, 
all six bears came  out of their den and wandered all over the same  
familiar territory they trekked in the spring of  2007. 



The photographer saw them before  mid-April and dreamed nightly of taking 
another  family portrait, a highly improbable second  once-in-a-lifetime 
photograph. 

On 25  April 2008, he achieved his dream. 

bears 2
 

When  something as magical as this happens between man and  animal, Native 
Americans say, "We have walked  together in the shadow of a rainbow." And 
so it is  with humility and great pleasure that I share  these
exhilarating  photos with you.
Do pass  them  on!

Amazing Bird Photos

Thanks to Paula S.

Amazing Bird Photos

 

Spirit Bear

Thanks to Fritz

Spirit Bear



Did you Enjoy This Page?
Please click +1
Facebook Twitter More...
More on Page 2
Page 1                                  Page 2                        Interesting Articles and videos