Sunday Family Humour 13th October

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

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What Is The problem

Thanks to Ray O'.

A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk.

The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?"

He replied, "They had avocados."

If you're a woman, I'm sure you're going back to read it again! Men will get it the first time.

My work is done here.

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Water in the carburetor

WIFE: "There is trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor."

HUSBAND: "Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous "

WIFE: "I tell you the car has water in the carburetor."

HUSBAND: "You don't even know what a carburetor is. I'll check it out. Where's the car?

WIFE: "In the pool"

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A FRIGHTENING STATISTIC THIS IS A FRIGHTENING STATISTIC, PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST WORRYSOME IN RECENT YEARS.

25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness.

That's scary.

It means 75% are running around untreated.

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A young man wanted to get his beautiful blonde wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary. So he decided to buy her a cell phone.

He showed her the phone and explained to her all of its features.

Meg was excited to receive the gift and simply adored her new phone.

The next day Meg went shopping.

Her phone rang and, to her astonishment, it was her husband on the other end.

"Hi Meg," he said, "how do you like your new phone?"

Meg replied, "I just love it! It's so small and your voice is clear as a bell, but there's one thing I don't understand though..."

"What's that, sweetie?" asked her husband.

"How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"

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HE MUST PAY

Husband and wife had a tiff. Wife called up her mom and said,

"He fought with me again, I am coming to live with you."

Mom said, "No darling, he must pay for his mistake. I am coming to live with you.

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Today's Short Reading from the Bible...

From Genesis: "And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the earth."

Then He made the earth round...and He laughed and laughed and laughed!

Animals Sharing Life

Thanks to Lee

Best of the Week

Thanks to Captain Bob

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Remarkable Photos

Thanks to David M.

This Ranger is assigned to prevent poaching around the wildlife refuge area

of Lanseria , South Africa . The way these animals interact with him is

absolutely stunning! The lions seem to know he's there to protect them. His

charm works with hyenas and lions too. Hyenas are usually vicious. Also,

check out the pics taken in the river.

Presentation is Everything

Thanks to David M.

God Made a Dog

Thanks to David M.

A matter of Perspective

Thanks to Andre M.

1. HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids)

-You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming.

-- Alan, age 10

-No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.

-- Kristen, age 10

2. WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then..

-- Camille, age 10

3. HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.-- Derrick, age 8

4. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MUM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

Both don't want any more kids.

-- Lori, age 8

5. WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

-Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.

-- Lynnette, age 8

(isn't she a treasure)

-On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date.

-- Martin, age 10

6. WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

-When they're rich.

-- Pam, age 7

-The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.

- - Curt, age 7

-The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.

- - Howard, age 8

7. IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

It's better for girls to be single but not for boys.

Boys need someone to clean up after them.

-- Anita, age 9 (bless you child )

8. HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?

-- Kelvin, age 8

And the #1 Favorite is .......

9. HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a dump truck.

-- Ricky, age 10

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