Debrief 1

After doing an empathy circle on the topic of

" A significant conversation we had last week, be it good, difficult or challenging" we debriefed together:

A. What insights or observations did we have, as we shared our stories of our communication experiences over this past week?

1. One insight had to do with the power and relief of communicating directly the phone as opposed to text or emails. So much more is made possible when we can hear one another's voices.

2. It can be a challenge to communicate in a straight way, not slipping into avoidance or anger. It can be a risk. Some of us pursued that straight path without reactivity, and we had an experience of being heard, which makes it more likely that we will do again.

3. Being in a helper role, it’s easy sometimes to overstep that role.

B. What did we learn about listening and being heardin doing the empathy circle?

1. As we reflect back information accurately, a shift can happen naturally that allows for a deeper sharing to emerge.

2. When we are being heard, it increases our own self-‐ understanding: this is a good example of "listening our self into Being".

3. Even when we are hearing other's stories, we can learn something about ourselves.

C. Self-‐observation about ourselves in the empathy circle

1. We noticed a distinct difference between when we are being the designated listener from when we are in an “observer” role in the circle. Being the designated listener, makes it much easier to put aside one’s self. Being in the witness or observerrole, it's much easier for thoughts, ideas, judgements to come in, while the speaker is speaking.

2. A beautiful quote by Rudoph Steiner was offered, which describes the act of listening as being “Asleep to myself and awake to the other”. Steiner saw this kind of listening as being an act of will.