Embedded Files
Intentions
Overall Intention: Foster Empathic Culture (and Community)
Specific Intention
Reconnection
Closure
Peoples individual intentions:
Alice
to be here and reconnect with you all.
to see what comes up in empathy circles and how they have been unfolding for us.
where to next? how do I continue to relate to the culture of empathy
Jonathan
to say thank you to everyone, it was an amazing journey
feels like we need to do some kind of a closure
what is the next step
Lidewij
reconnecting with everyone
where are we going to take it from here
are we going to take it?
Sherry
closing the loop (closure)
what comes next? curiosity and be present
Edwin
closure
look at the circle from a distance and see what’s next
Summary
reconnecting
evaluating circle experience
closure
next steps
Discussion Topic: What is alive for us? What’s going on for us around empathy circles?
I had 2 events that related to empathy circles,
home with the family and Empathy research
Jonathan
had 2 events that related to empathy circles
1. home with the family - attitude didn’t change but thought of edwin and his family stories
where I can step in. He didn’t step in and empathize. but I was cooler with the situation.
being part of the circle helped with being cooler
2. Empathy research
looking at his empathy research. lot of changes happening in his vision
mentors are understanding his model and how it relates to empathy
a process has ended now and a new energies thing is coming up
sensing something new is happening and coming up.
happy to see everyone
Sherry
happy to see everyone
feeling a sense of connection coming in
have taken a hiatus on empathy
focusing on personal work in a group - creating conscious community
is an extension of the empathy circle - conference calls,
what is my perspective on the empathy circle now? what is the perspective?
clearer now for what I am looking for.
looking for deeper alignment in what I am looking for.
I was looking for something but not clear on what I was looking for
this circle supported me finding out what I was looking for.
may use this process (empathy circles) in my community.
I’m looking for time and space to get back to
empathy work in a more reflective way
Lideweij
I’m doing something else, a travelers life
looking for time and space to get back to empathy work in a more reflective way
house here is space to reflect
grateful (gratitude) to have time to create booklet on empathy circles
I work on empathy every day of my life. Always working on it in my mind. the past two years have been practice oriented and had to step back. Reflect: what do I want to carry on, what do I want to build my empathy practice on.
Finalizing booklet is this reflection.
Working on the book I longed for coming back to all of you. I felt grateful for all we went through in the last year and half.
If we decide to go forward we might like to look at what we want to do.. but you know, you're my empathy buddies. I feel very happy reconnecting with all of you.
.
I can’t remember all the ideas that
are floating around
Alice
can’t remember all the ideas that are floating around
Experience of applying empathy experience with friends. Offered it with a friend. brought back the feeling calmness in empathy circles.,. With first friend, the experience was profound and she had a revelation, the talking about the circles didn’t make a difference but the doing was profound.
the feeling I get in the empathy space is like none other.
story of grandson and his illness - a lot going on. an unfolding energy that I can’t articulate.
the empathy work is core - don’t know what form it will take.
am grateful for taking part in circle and for the empathy booklet.
want conversation: what is the intention of an empathy circle?
want conversation: what about personal needs versus culture of empathy
Jonathan
experience with 2 students I was helping. they were accusing me
I came to the meeting hurt and angry, thought of having my list of accusations
but used empathy, I just reflected, I created a platform to listen and not fight
went from accusations and changed intention to connection, listening, empathy
my personal needs, felt hurt insulted, my need was for connection.
I hadn’t heard from others about why the empathic listening wasn’t more used in peoples families,
relationships, etc
Edwin
Evaluating the circle. 2 part
1. extremely helpful in my own learning and empathic listening
2. another thread in the family. expanding, doing empathy circles with my sister in-laws parents.
circles fosters support and empathic resilience on one hand.
other part, I’ve used it continuously in the family, I hadn’t heard from others about why the empathic listening wasn’t more part of using in people families, relationships, etc. why didn’t it go into peoples lives more personally and intensely?
I wonder if the intention of a culture of empathy. it’s such a big intention, if it’s too overwhelming. I’ve moved to the intention of building community. Empathic local community. the larger cultural change is still there but I am looking at building local empathic community and I’m working on that.
for me there needs to be more of that in person support. How to build local empathic community.
had thought of workshops, but they tend to be transactional empathy experience. There’s not that ongoing commitment that I’m looking for.
Since I’m working on it all the time, I’m seeing the need for an ongoing support structure to keep going on with it,
Lideweij
That was an evaluation
I see the directions we may be doing are different things.
there's a ripple effect
we’re taking it in related, but different directions
I’’m lacking something in these circles. I noticed something in the circles that we hit a point and the next person will take it in the next direction and I don’t want to be that person. There will be a shift but I don’t want to lead it.
maybe there is something lacking in the format. Someone takes the discussion in direction instead of it being a the shared mutual experience taking it in the next direction.
Sherry
I’m resonating with what Lideweij said and I’m perplexed or curious.. I’m going to say, I’m curious about what we would want to say about closure and next steps. I’d like to see what other people would like to see happen as well.
people shared on how they are but not on closure and next steps.
open space and curiosity about closure and next steps.
I’m curious about what we would want to say
about closure and next steps.
Edwin
I just keep working and moving forward
with what I’m doing
I just keep working and moving forward with what I’m doing, so what to add beyond that.
about the space, what is the quality of the we that we are looking at. is there a we and is there a we space. There is individual intentions, there is the quality of the ‘we’. we can name the we space.
experiment with talking about the ‘we’. we speace form ‘we’.
the whole circle is about we.
that is something I’m thinking about
speaking to the comment about lidewij person who takes control.
Jonathan
My story was my closure: closure is a thanks and gratitude
Was in a more accepting group and mutual understanding.
different from academia and the competition, being on top.
For me I’m conflicted about the next steps but I’m so busy. but would like to experiment..
Next step: interested in the proposal, changing something in the circle each time.
My story was my closure:
closure is a thanks and gratitude
I don’t do closure
Lidewij
I don’t do closure - I don't’ know if I have a need or something to add.
Since we have dissimilar needs - we have to address those needs
there is the experimentation that edwin is proposing. and jonathan interested. I’m interested in.
We haven’t been in the circle development.
I’m questioning the online environment
personal next steps
personal need. I’d like to reconnect with each other, empathy circles for what is up for us.
going out there with the empathy circle training in people's own environments
writing the book have seen it’s a strong process
Alice
Experiencing that in empathy circles my brain is not clear, I don’t speak very clearly. I can be more clear, and want to learn to do it in EC’s.
I start getting panicky because my muddly mess will be reflected back to me when we do reflective listening.
why hasn’t it spread more in people's personal lives?
it’s from your experience with empathy circles. more than me
I need more training
also interested in continuing
want to learn more about the intention of each element in the EC structure
want to know about the overall intention.
from the booklet parts resonated or had thought of, and others didn’t . Want to explore the parts that surprised me further.
need to be a more structured training.
what is closure for?
resolve or let go of tensions from the past
and prepare for the future.
Closure
what is closure for?
resolve or let go of tensions from the past and prepare for the future.
fuels new beginning
new energy to carry you forward
remove the brakes and accelerate the energy going forward
we never felt closure with Ericka
how to let things go
it’s almost like it’s seen as it’s a waste of time
I’d like to propose we
go forward perhaps twice a month and look at closure
spend more time together.
experiment with ‘WE’ idea
we have a time together to form a we and address the closure question, consciously look at the we.
2:00 something wants to express itself through me. I feel I’m not being clear and I’m wasting everyone's time. But at the same time I feel I have something very clear I want to say. And I feel it wants to be said. I feel emotional about that. There’s a lot of energy around it and it’s difficult in seeing it clearly and not being able to express it to other people to see it clearly. Like I said, I feel like giving up but then I know that’s not what empathy circles are about. And when you talk about the we, maybe this is something I need to stay with and try and articulate. Or it’s even embarrassing.
How about we have some sessions which are about reconnecting and there is no clear new project on the table.
It’s about closure, but it’s also learning about closure, we can be experimental, in connecting and exploring closure.
by doing work on our own closure we could be doing development and experiments on empathy circles.
Sherry
I’m touched that you stayed with yourself and use and I appreciate how you’ve put yourself forward
Jonathan
let’s summarize how we each feel now?
Alice
I would like to meet again
Recording ends
Jonathan: All of us agreed that we will do two more empathy circle in the next two upcoming Fridays at the same time. Let us know if it works for you as well.
Lidewij :
I want to share with you all that I've felt a strange drained feeling after the circle. Not sure why or where it comes from but it has been influencing my day so far and I'm looking at it as much as I can. Did we really connect together? Anyone any thoughts on this?
I want to share with you all that I've felt a strange
drained feeling after the circle.
Alice:
I realise in retrospect that I didn’t feel very connected either. In some ways I felt more connected after my emotional episode, but I also felt embarrassed. I accepted the space and support everyone gave me, yet I didn’t feel sure that it was really OK that I did what I did. I feel a tension between the need to ‘get on with it’ and allowing space for the messiness of human feelings, and the process of connecting and coming to a true experience of the ‘we’.
I realise in retrospect that I didn’t
feel very connected either.
Have any of you read the 1987 book by M. Scott Peck ( of ‘The Road Less Travelled’ fame) called ‘The DIfferent Drum’ - subtitled ‘the creation of true community - the first step to world peace’. I think it’s very aligned with and relevant to what we are exploring. I loved it when I read it years ago but have never heard much discussion of it. I pricked up my ears when Edwin you talked about the ‘we’, as it’s very much about a state of community when there is somehow no separation, though there is diversity and abundant space to be oneself. I feel I have experienced that in the EC’s at times, but there is no guarantee that we will connect in that way every time. Peck describes a thing called ‘pseudo-community’ which is what we do when we are nice to each other and don’t rock the boat, in order to avoid conflict. That’s one aspect of it anyway. These concepts of Peck’s are so relevant, and I can’t do them justice second hand, that I am going to photocopy a chapter and upload it to our shared folder.
There’s another book that is a favourite of mine, called ‘We Have to Talk’ by Samuel Shem and Janet Surrey, that is about couple relationships and the ‘we’. I find it also very relevant to our exploration, so I’ve copied a chapter of it called ‘Getting to We’ and uploaded it too, in case others are interested.
I wrote the following in response to Lidewij on Google chat after the EC and wanted to share with you all who may not have seen it. I just reconnected myself with what I wrote there and am glad I did as the part about learning to communcate more clearly had slipped off y radar!
I did feel a bit self-conscious that I had taken so much time and made things get messy! At another level I knew it was genuine and that as a group we value and give space for authenticity. I just didn't want to be lacking in self-restraint and it felt a bit like I was.
I love the way there is permission to stay with the true feelings in the group, and though it might seem to derail our 'progress' at times, I think it is really the source, or the indicator, of how this consciously empathic way of relating is different and valuable.
I'm looking forward to experiencing and exploring further. I am still puzzled by how difficult it was to communicate what to me was quite clear. It was a lesson for me to ponder and unpack. I see that I need to learn to describe insights I'm having better. I'm shifting from deciding that the idea was no good, or the people were not good listeners, to trusting myself when I know an idea is good and being more patient and careful in communicating it, with awareness of and respect for the different ways that people think. This seems to be a big one for me. I have had a tendency to abandon the attempt to convey an idea too easily, holding onto frustration and loss of respect for myself and others. It's time to change that!
The experience of the space to see what was going on has allowed me to decide to shift out of this habit and become effective at communicating the ideas that are given to me.
.
Edwin:
I know a couple of people who are talking about empathy and community. ie “we’
just did an interview with Kelly Bryson http://j.mp/1d89B0x
He is very tuned into it and something called “New Culture” and
I know a couple of people who are talking
about empathy and community. ie “we’
Maureen O'Hara who worked with Carl Rogers. http://j.mp/12kKKzd
"In Rogers' original work a key component of the core facilitative conditions for individual growth is empathy. Empathy has since been shown to be the gold standard for effective facilitation in any growth-focused relationship. Empathy is commonly regarded as an individual-to-individual phenomenon in which one person senses the unspoken or inchoate thoughts or feelings of another. Our observations show that group or relational empathy may be even more important than individual empathy in the formation of conscious communities."
groan zone, In facilitated group dynamics there is also the groan zone, it’s where the dialog takes place where people attune to each other and have to work out their differences.
Navigating the Groan Zone is an Art
“As we begin to feel overloaded, overwhelmed or uncomfortable, or we begin to question “the process”, or the leaders or hosts of the process, or we are just tired and grumbly, we are desiring understanding and often looking for convergence. What does it all mean? What should we do now? When can we be done? All questions that indicate we are near or in the groan zone.”
The groan zone, it’s where the dialog takes place
where people attune to each other and have to
work out their differences.
Jonathan Friesem
Thank you all for sharing your thoughts and feeling.
Each one of us is highly connected to
the rest in many different ways.
I guess in my way I told three personal stories to create an intimate space and bigger connection. I felt, as well, many of the experiences and feeling you described in and after the circle such as embarrassment (Alice) disconnection (Lidewij) curiosity (Sherry) and the WE (Edwin).
I do not know if I would call it disconnection more than reconnecting. Each one of us is highly connected to the rest in many different ways. It has been a long time and each of us with our individual communication skills was trying to connect. I think that is the source of the tiredness that I felt like you Lidewij. Somewhat over doing. However, at the end, the emotions that were shared thanks to you Alice connected and resonated the importance and the options of the online empathic circle.
==================================
Summary Topics Edwin
empathy circle lots of building on the circle
the nature of the circles
circle not working to address people's needs to a certain level
ie the circles are not so compelling that they take a high priority in people lives.
how to make them more compelling?
why don’t people implement and use the circle and empathic listening in their daily life?
Going forward
creating local community
weekly meetings
and benefits
What if harvesting was more complete and a greater part of the circle?
we need it for sense of completion and feeling of shared meaning.
This would take more time in the circles to address and maybe time offline.
People are applying Empathic Listening
Alice - offers Empathic Listening to a friend
Jonathan - used Empathic Listening with two students who he was antagonistic with
Sherry - may use it in her group.
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Sept 27/28, 2013 - What’s Next?
Edwin
Would have liked a more systematic HCD process to have determined what’s next
1. would like a HCD Developing Empathy Circle Group with financial viability included.
What is the Design Challenge?
Start with some prototype paid circles
Needs a commitment to develop
Need to transcribe and organize material
Work during the week and in between meetings.
in Circles we are in mirrored empathy mode,
Need to go into Empathy Model
Defining the Problems to work on
Brainstorming
Prototyping
Testing
etc.
2. Support Circles?
Do your own projects and come to the circle for support
Can have Empathy Buddies as support
Support can be part of the HCD project - i.e. incorporate support
hosting paid circles can be support
Can have Empathy Buddies as support
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Circle: Sept 20/21, 2013
Suggestion for a process to use today as an empathic support circle.
Empathy Circle Process from EC2 Google Doc Sept 1, 2012
Introduction exercise
(Self Empathy) Meditation (2 min.)
Close your eyes. We start with a short meditative session to refocus ourselves within our own body. What do you feel? Turn your feeling into a physical motion. Keep your eyes closed and make the motion for yourself.
(Mirrored Empathy) Mirror Present Feeling exercise
Everybody opens the eyes and one person starts making their motion. The group mirrors each other until person stops.
Move on to mirroring motion of the next person
Share Empathy story (5 minutes)
One person brings a story of one of the following:
How he/she engaged in empathic action this week (or how he/she failed to do so)
A struggle building empathy
A celebration of empathy
Reflection by all circle members
Everyone reflects what they have heard.
After completing the circle we ask: do you feel fully heard?
If not fully heard, express what the circle has missed. What still do you feel needs to be heard about his story? (no new information)
Then: What new feelings or associations have come up while hearing the reflections?
(Have you been fully heard) Yes.
Questions
Every person in the circle reflects on what the story evokes in him/herself
Every person in the circle asks a question coming from their own perspective. (to clarify the empathic process)
The question a member of the circle asks may be in a form such as role play - as we did with Erika’s story on Sept 1, 2012 (AA note, Sept 20 2013)
The storyteller reflects on what defined the evaluation of empathic success or failure. The circle helps figuring it out (through questions?).
Consolidation of the experience
The storyteller shares new insights after the analyses
What do you think about it now?
how do you feel now?
What have you learned? -> translate to action
Empathic Actions
Pay the insight forward:
what are very specific actions you're going to do now. If possible, related to the story which you’ve been empathically heard about yourself.
next week’s circle: start off by (shortly) sharing the action and its effects
Create Minutes document
Closing Mirroring Exercise of person that brought the topic to the circle.
how do you feel now? Turn it into a motion. Empathy circle mirrors
Stop Recording
How can we improve the process?
What worked well
(get some positive testimonials for promotion)
End of Meeting
======================================
Having a Support Circle
an empathic action for this week
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Circle: Sep 13, 2013
what’s next?
Sherry
the tires are spinning
talking about direction, fluidity and commitment
Article
Network (fluidity)
Community of practice - (team)
cultural shift.
Jonathan
reply to sherrys email
metta the limits of the empathy circle - it’s natural
dynamic of the group
Alice
there’s a map
do we want to step into a team
designing something
the commitment - put a lot of time into projects
this feels like there’s enough experience that this could be worth putting a commitment into
intention and not method
an idea but nothing to show for it.
the caution.. is this a path that will work?
a conscious step
open to stepping into a commitment
I’m getting there. the metaphor - making a new cake but don’t have to invent all the processes
Many steps to make an effective contribution - commitment is impacted by the tools and skills
Sherry
want a clarity of what the commitment is
what are we agreeing to?
have commitment to 2 hours a week
do I want to be on a team?
does it fit with what I’m on the planet to do
What is the design challenge?
teaching - no
Need support around actions I’m taking in the world
centered around justice - applied empathy
support for actions I’m taking
feel said that I said the things I said. not sure what it means
Jonathan
Joyce
Sherry
want support - other process
curious on the design challenge.
How can the empathy circle support our individual action?
support of the circle and efficiency
empathy support
academic research
can’t do it in 2 hours
Two Circles
Support
HCD
Support can be empathy buddy
The direction to go
a design team
.
Meeting - Aug 23 - 2013 - What if…?
Sherry
what if we were all on google hangouts and doing our crafts?
[questioning empathy as a foundational thing? ]
what if we have different containers to for different criteria open it up a bit
what if we imaginative empathy
what if we have periodic circle around what if around conflict -
Alice
feeling fully heard.. I didn't speak my truth.
( Yearning and people not addressing the yearning.]
What if we took more responsibility to say when we are really fully heard?
What if we made choices in the movement ????
What if we think about the whole as well as ourselves?
What if we are tuned into ourselves and the whole but not from our heads but from our feelings?
[the translation of experience into other perspectives]
[What are our needs for empathy?]
What if we have other kinds of ways of doing the circle. silence, talking stick, etc?
What if we write down the all these different possibilities for the circle?
What if we at the beginning we have a decision about what we will do in the circle?
What if we develop the empathy workshop idea? have a yearning for that.
What if we develop the empathy workshop - a prototype?
What if we use HCD to create an empathy workshop - a prototype?
(felt as a loss that this might not happen)
I felt fully heard because I heard myself.
Edwin
What if we incorporate Human Centered Design and Design Thinking process into the Empathy Circle process?
I have a lot of projects in mind?
Focused on a specific projects
we do a 4 week series on HCD???
What if we do a more emotion directed empathy circle on empathizing with our fears?
I had an experience in dance of going toward my fears. I was trying to get as close as possible to the felt experience of my fears, anxieties. stresses and unease. I wanted to feel the minute granular essence of them as a felt experience. Really to let the experience fill my awareness and then zoom in to see and experience the minute speck and structure of the fear. It's like taking a magnifying glass to zoom in on the individual grains of sand in a bowl of sand.
.
2013-08-09 Empathy Circle
I wish
.
2013-08-02 - Empathy Circle
Edwin
I Like?
I Like the feeling of spaciousness
I feel more sense of space developing in myself.
I Like developing empathic resilience
I find that practicing empathic listening helps me to develop what I call empathic resilience. It's like my empathy battery gets charged and I have more space and capacity to empathize with others during the day. I find that having practiced empathic listening in the circle helped me meditate a family conflict. I had the inner groundedness and space that I could be present, face my fears and anxieties and maintain an empathic presence in the middle of a conflict. I was then able to mediate the conflict to a successful conclusion.
When the conflict started and I stepped into it. I felt a deep fear through the core of my body, it was as if there were icicles where my bones should be. However, I also, at the same time, felt a field of spaciousness and warmth in and around my body. That empathic warmth is what I brought into the mediation, which ended with hugs all around.
I Like feeling supported and being heard
In the circle I have a space to share and be heard about things that are going on in my life. I look forward to being able to share my daily experiences and feel heard about them. In life sometimes I don't feel people are not interested in what I say or really listen to me, but in the circle I feel more deeply heard and it feels nurturing and nourishing.
I Like not having to compete to be heard
Not having to compete to be heard allows me to be more relaxed. My ideas have space to unfold. If I don't feel like people are really interested in what I have to say I tend to withdraw.
I Like consistency of practice
By meeting in a regular weekly format it feels like something I can count on. It gives me something to look forward to.
I Like developing closer connections with others in the circle.
In the circle we learn more and more about each other and I feel we are getting closer.
I Like the effectiveness of Empathy Circle
I experience the circles as being very effective in fostering empathy. In fact I see it as the most effective way I have seen of training, practicing and nurturing empathy. It really, really works!
I like that we have the intention of fostering empathy
I am wanting to foster empathy in my life and in the world, so it's great to have a group that has the same intention. I like working on the shared vision and values together.
I like moving toward creativity
I Wish?
I Wish we had better harvesting
I'd like to see more and better harvesting of all the ideas and material that we are collecting. For example creating a finished paper, article, prototype, etc. out of the circles to create a sense of action and completion.
I Wish we would be working more on developing the circles between circles
We meet in the circle for 1.5 or 2 hours but do not do a lot between circles on developing the circles.
I Wish we had a larger, deeper, ongoing and in-person community
I'm looking for a more intense empathic community experience. We we can get together in person on a daily-weekly long term way. 2 hours a week is not enough, not deep enough. Church of empathy - workshops will not change the culture.
I Wish We had more intensity
I Wish for more empathic creativity and action
it is about action and not just talking
like the work Sherry and I have been doing
I Wish there was more online interest in Empathy Circles
Not many people seem to be interested in joining circles online. I wish there was more interest and demand for empathy circles. I feel that if held the circle, did all the work of inviting people, etc, then they would form, but people don't seem to be interested in or understand the importance of empathy circles.
I Wish we had more effectiveness
Effectiveness in creating processes, material and support for the empathy movement.
What if?
What if we incorporate Human Centered Design and Design Thinking process into the Empathy Circle process?
I have a lot of projects in mind?
Focused on a specific projects
we do a 4 week series on HCD???
What if we do a more emotion directed empathy circle on empathizing with our fears?
I had an experience in dance of going toward my fears. I was trying to get as close as possible to the felt experience of my fears, anxieties. stresses and unease. I wanted to feel the minute granular essence of them as a felt experience. Really to let the experience fill my awareness and then zoom in to see and experience the minute speck and structure of the fear. It's like taking a magnifying glass to zoom in on the individual grains of sand in a bowl of sand.
As I got closer to the fears, they would melt away and within 5 or 6 seconds it seemed that another ones. While I was doing this the thought came to me. "This would be good to do with others, It would be supportive to be sharing this with others." The experience of moving through the fears, anxieties, etc. was immensely calming and relaxing in the end. While doing it, it was difficult. On one hand, I wanted to pull away, not deal with it anymore. To avoid the fear and pain of it. I wanted to stop dealing with the pain of being present with the fear. However, as I passed through one after another fear, I felt so warn, centered and grounded. Really had a deep sense of peace after doing this exploration for an hour or more.
What if we spent time on organizing our Empathy Circle ??
Ideas
Idea: Do a motion of what I like and have the group mirror it.
Idea: Use Design thinking to create a attitude of continual creation and innovation.
Idea: Question to ask: The Empathy Circle Feels Like??
Human Centered Design Projects
How might we raise the level of empathy in the human centered design community?
How might we empathically redesign the spiritual-religious experience to better support peoples values, needs, aspirations and hopes?
How might we create an empathic culture in the school?
How might we create an empathy training workshop?
How might we developed a financially sustainable empathy process?
How might we develop the empathy circle process to better support peoples values, needs, aspirations and hopes?
How might we build a culture of empathy with empathy circles?
I wish we had even more Artistic expression
dialogic - drama
collage
metaphor
Alice > Sherry
Appreciation for your willingness to really go with the inquiry there and express it
brings something to the circle
a jump to a bigger dimension
an opening up to each other that has an impact
a magic wand where some time happens.
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Empathy Circle - July 26, 2013
Today’s circle is about evaluating the empathy circles we’ve done so far and looking at what are the next steps.
I Like…
I Wish…
What if…
Facilitator
Lidewij
have in-person workshops
empathy circle handbook
phone apps for empathy
we’ve let go of the structure of the parts of empathy
reflect on the practice
go through a formal circle about the circle process
it’s a strong practice of reflective listening - it comes easy
might help to build it in
feel inspired - it’s my baby
Edwin
action
Sherry
I wonder what’s happening in the flow
the energy is different coming in later
I like - rhythm or regular connection
companionship
like circle in general
I wish - we could do it in person
desire to connect in the physical world
measure on connection n the commuter
connecting just on computer s not good for organism
speck into silence - try some other ways of being together.
try other empathy circle exercise
more candid from the circles with family - i see the influence on y life
maybe
Sara
Jonathan
About the structure - and the feeling
Sharing the current state
Doodle
J, A S , O
4 emphasis
have a calendar with dates and
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Empathy Circle - July 20, 2013
Jonathan > Alice
2 questions
1. What is the end purpose of our work/aspiration?
2. Is Empathy the way to get it?
Jonathan will it lead to kindness
What lead you to empathy?
Alice > Sherry
came to it from the Parenting
haven’t found anything better
Joanna Macy
Journeying - where are we now? Where do we want to go
environment
justice
spirituality
empathy is not talked about but core -
the great turning - lead me to empathy
to the family of the future
“I’d like to say that I fostered empathy”
“I was part of a movement”
“want to make a contribution”
Sherry
Edwin > Jonathan
why do we have the intention of empathy?
feeling of it
Jonathan > Sherry
reviewing what each person said
( what looking for > and> how to get there )
Alice - feel meaningful - hope
Sherry - feel alive - through connection
Edwin - Feel: cared, loved, care and love
Jonathan - ??? synergy and goodness, contribute understanding, honouring each other.
not such an effort to understand the other
Sherry > Jonathan
what are your answers to the question?
Jonathan > Edwin
Edwin > Alice
Next week
harvesting - reflect on the circles?
what worked?
what didn’t work?
what would you like see happen?
how to proceed?
reflect for next wee
July 6, 2013
jonathan and his work
Study doing a training with 30 foster kids
Doing a training and curriculum
Want to bring in empathy but they want academics
His research - find empathic assessment tools
don’t like the survey measurements of empathy
using tools empathy went down - different from reality
using observation
difficult on large scale
film making - conflict - fostering empathy
want to advocate for empathy don’t want to =really measure it.
measurement is just a tool to foster empathy
Big Question is how to measure Empathy in an empathic and efficient (academic) ways
Notes:
[let’s do a measure assessment of the assessment tools.]
check with Roots of Empathy and how they do it?
Rogers mentions some measurements (observations)
how are you feeling about the task or project
why does empathy really need to be measured?
+if you weight the sheep they will get fatter
Use the Design Thinking process for the participant to create empathy measurements
Alice's point of the measurement should foster empathy
Use Design Thinking process to develop the tool
a team - 6 to 10
a tool that people can use themselves
create a physical prototype
detached observation versus subjective involvement - Empathy book
Perspective taking project at Ed Dept at Harvard
Try doing role taking
“I am the empathy assessment tool”
dialogs with?
What part-type of empathy do you want to test
Holistic
Parts
Self-empathy
Synchronization
Perspective taking
Empathic action
Lidewij
did a study - driving?
with perspective taking.
didn’t work
the behavioural measures
need to measure it holistically and
what is empathy?
Sherry
some thoughts
using jars for stones
Jonathan
connecting it to other tools
created a chart
not a lot of measurements in the education field
how to measure empathy in an empathic way?
use Empathic Listening in the interviews
detached observation versus subjective involvement
use surveys - something engaging like a video game
students do a creative project and it’s analysed by the teacher
quadrats
Alice
Could be used for parenting
would like to take part in the team for this
Alice
Jonathan
nice to hear it’s important to everyone
empathy is constructed by
looking at the model
Sherry
love tables-models?
map is not the territory but a good thing to do
Lidewij
graid makes sense and want to add
.
Empathy Circle 02b - Archive June 28 and back
File was getting too long so check the archive here.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xRVq6Xhx-vTtDrUGoO9GfyoccmcWNsotkvmnmKmSz60/edit
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