3. Submission and Price

Thud, thud. The soft tapping of small stones against the window made Yiseo flinch. Even amidst the loud noises that tightly filled the alley at night, this small sound reverberated loudly in Yiseo’s ears, as if awakening the entire night. Her taut nerves, which had been waiting, snapped, and she felt her strength drain away.

Late at night, Yiseo quietly opened the front door. She walked slowly, arms crossed. As she reached the end of the alley, she saw a small light waiting for her at the corner. It glowed like a firefly, leaving a luminous mark, lingering on someone’s lips before dropping to the ground as she approached. As her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she slowly saw him.

When she hesitated and stopped, Tae Mujin’s lips subtly curved upwards.

“Take it.”

And then, as always, he held out a plastic bag. Only then did Yiseo take another step towards him.

Heat rose to Yiseo’s face as she opened the bag. It was full of daily necessities like toothpaste, toothbrushes, and shampoo. How did he know? Thanks to her aunt, who didn’t even bother to provide such mundane things, she had been managing with just a bar of soap.

She touched her flushed forehead and tucked her hair behind her ears. The scent of soap wafted from her hair, which was still damp because she had no hairdryer. She bit her lip tightly. This was why it was so obvious. Still, the word “thank you” did not escape her lips. After all, there was a different price to pay.

Suddenly, Mujin’s arm gripped hers, pulling her close. She was embraced in his wide chest, and their lips met.

After she bore the scarlet letter of being a woman “managed” by him, the bullying miraculously stopped. And as if truly managing her, Tae Mujin would provide necessary things, just like now. And every night, he would come and kiss her as payment.

As her breathing quickened slightly, Tae Mujin seemed to sense it and released Yiseo’s lips for a moment. Taking advantage of the break, she gasped for breath, and a low chuckle reached her ears. Yiseo buried her face in Tae Mujin’s chest and asked, annoyed,

“Do you always manage women this way?”

She felt his lips pressing against her temple curve into a smile. Not always this way, he mumbled, and Tae Mujin kissed her again.

“It’s cold... I want to go in now.”

Tae Mujin gently rubbed Yiseo’s slightly reddened earlobe with his finger and clucked his tongue.

“Bear with it. You haven’t paid enough yet.”

At his blunt words, Yiseo snapped her head up and glared at Tae Mujin. She was enduring it because she also thought the same, but hearing it from him felt humiliating. However, Tae Mujin, whom she looked up at, was curving his eyes as if amused.

“You’ve had that expression all along. Like you’re being shaken down by a debtor, saying, ‘Just do it quickly and get lost.’“

“Is this... quick?”

Tae Mujin laughed aloud and kissed Yiseo below her eye. Then, he pulled something from the inside pocket of his jacket and handed it to her. The surroundings were dim, and as Yiseo peered at it, her face immediately crumpled. It was a wad of rolled cash, though she didn’t know the exact amount.

“What is this...? No. I absolutely won’t take it!”

“Don’t bother with this pointless tug-of-war, just take it. You don’t even have money for lunch, eating bread crumbs every day.”

“I’d rather starve than this! Absolutely, absolutely no!!”

She couldn’t accept it. It was already overwhelming, and if she took this money, which felt like payment for sex, she was afraid of what Tae Mujin would demand next. Now it was just her lips, but next, and then... She didn’t want to think any further, so she hysterically pushed Tae Mujin’s shoulder, but he didn’t budge.

“Don’t put on airs. Haven’t you realized by now that it doesn’t work here?”

“So? Should I abandon my pride and sit on that terrace?”

Tae Mujin’s usually relaxed face hardened. His calm dark pupils seemed to ripple for a moment, and Yiseo swallowed dryly.

“You don’t know what those women sitting there have to endure for just a few pennies.”

“...So you’re trying to teach me, aren’t you?”

Teach? Tae Mujin let out a short, hollow laugh and then sighed deeply. He placed his thumb on Yiseo’s lips and slowly traced their outline. “Don’t,” Yiseo grimaced and resisted, but instead, his thumb moved slightly further in. Tae Mujin flipped her lower lip down and, stroking the inner membrane and lower teeth, said,

“You act like you’re about to bite your tongue off from just a kiss, and what? ‘Teach’?”

“Ah... stop, stop it.”

“Do you really want me to teach you?”

Yiseo shivered and shook her head, and his thumb went a little deeper. Her pronunciation was poor, and she mumbled warnings to stop several times. When his tongue still pressed down, Yiseo couldn’t stand it any longer and gritted her teeth. She seemed to have bitten quite hard, but Tae Mujin chuckled faintly as if tickled. In place of his withdrawn thumb, Tae Mujin took off his jumper and wrapped it around Yiseo.

“I can’t come tomorrow. So bear with it, even if you don’t like it.”

Their lips met again. The jumper, as large as a blanket for Yiseo, enveloped her back. And with her front against his broad chest, she felt entirely submerged in Tae Mujin. Throughout the kiss, she smelled an odor that she could never get used to.

It was like the smell of people burning wood in the secluded parts of Seoryeong, or the cold, damp smell of the mist that descended from the mountains every dawn, covering Seoryeong in a haze. Like Tae Mujin’s kiss, it was raw and vivid, and she could never get used to it. Her head felt dizzy, and Yiseo pushed him away.

“...The smell of cigarettes makes me dizzy.”

At her words, his lips finally parted. His face, looking down, seemed to show a fleeting hint of bitterness, and then he finally told her to go in.

________________________________________

The next day, when Tae Mujin, who had rarely attended school, sat on the piano bench and asked her to play a song, Yiseo was dumbfounded.

“It’s not ‘pick a song’... and that bench is for one person.”

“Then come up here and play.”

Up where? Before she could ask, Tae Mujin grabbed Yiseo’s waist and sat her on his lap.

“Ah! What are you doing?!”

As she squirmed in surprise, her waist was constricted by his arm, firm as a rope. She was about to yell, “What if someone sees us?” but then realized it didn’t matter who saw, and her strength drained away. After all, the scarlet letter of Tae Mujin would already be branded on the eyes of every student.

The brand of Tae Mujin was overwhelmingly effective.

Oh Jang-heon, the boys, and Jeong Ji-yu hadn’t been seen since that day, but no one, not even the teachers, cared about their absence. No one dared to treat Yiseo poorly anymore. They couldn’t even mutter a word, let alone scoff. She felt their eyes on her whenever they had a chance, but as soon as their eyes met, their gaze immediately darted away. The bullying had completely disappeared.

Could it have been this simple? Everything was sucked into the name Tae Mujin, leaving her powerless, as if in a vacuum.

Tae Mujin rested his chin on Yiseo’s shoulder, which had lost its fight and grown still, and spoke.

“Play that song again.”

“...What song?”

“The one you played in music class last time.”

“...If I play it, will you leave?”

Tae Mujin rested his chin on the back of Yiseo’s head and chuckled.

Yiseo gave up and placed her hands on the keyboard. It felt strange to play the song she had played with such heightened nerves towards Tae Mujin, now sitting on his lap.

She couldn’t concentrate due to the elevated position, but the performance ended reasonably well. However, Tae Mujin demanded she play it again. And again, and again, after the song ended...

“Just in case you don’t know, there are many other pieces in classical music besides this one.”

Tae Mujin chuckled softly and said he would listen to those next time.

As the repeated playing grew tiresome, Tae Mujin continued to demand, and the shoulder he leaned on grew heavier and heavier. Just as she wondered if he mistook it for a lullaby, Tae Mujin asked,

“Does this kind of instrumental piece have a title?”

“...Beethoven’s Piano Sonata No. 8, Second Movement.”

“Hmm.” Tae Mujin slightly furrowed his brow, so Yiseo added,

“It’s also simply called ‘Pathetique.’“

“Is it like, comforting sorrow, something like that?”

“...How did you know?”

“Just. It sounds like that.”

At his simple but accurate answer, Yiseo was speechless. Beethoven was truly great, she thought, praising Beethoven instead of Tae Mujin’s unnecessarily good intuition, and was about to return to the beginning of the piece.

“Ah...”

Tae Mujin turned Yiseo’s body and kissed her. He had always kissed her with her neck craned back, so kissing her face-to-face felt subtly different. No... the angle of their lips meeting... no... a different scent than usual... a sweet taste...

“Did you... chew gum or something?”

Yiseo pushed him away and asked.

“Someone said their head hurt from sucking on an ashtray.”

Yiseo’s heart twitched at Tae Mujin’s faint chuckle.

That’s not what she meant, but when Tae Mujin pushed, she wanted to resist. And then Tae Mujin would sneer, ignore her words, push harder... That’s how it always was... But wasn’t this cheating?

“Peach scent and you don’t suit each other at all. Cigarette smoke is better.”

This was natural between them. To eventually say something hateful, just like she was doing now.

“It doesn’t suit me, that’s true.”

Their lips met again, and the sweet peach scent clung to her mucous membranes.

The music room was cool without heating, and she had to blow on her hands even during practice. But her body kept getting hotter. Only Tae Mujin’s embrace, where she was held, felt fiery, like a different world. Were all boys this warm? Heat poured in as if she was hugging a large stove. Her body, which had been cold all day, felt like it was being doused with hot water, and her entire body tingled unbearably.

“Are you going to keep distracting me?”

Yiseo twisted her flushed face out of Tae Mujin’s embrace.

“It’s almost vacation... not much time left to practice.”

She mumbled, fiddling with the keys, and the hand that had been stroking her hair from behind stopped midway. Tae Mujin listened to her unfocused playing for a moment, then left the music room.

On the piano’s top board was a shopping bag Tae Mujin had left. When she opened it, she found a sandwich, kimbap, cookies, and juice. What kind of menu was this? She chuckled, unwrapped the sandwich, and took a bite.

Then she saw a plastic container in the corner of the shopping bag and pulled it out—it was spoonfuls of jelly. Peach-flavored, at that. Suddenly, someone who had chosen gum of the same flavor, remembering her, came to mind, and the sandwich wouldn’t go down anymore.

________________________________________

The next day, Yiseo’s nerves, which had been on edge since she arrived in Seoryeong, reached their peak. She had scolded Yihwan, who had recently become unruly and foul-mouthed, but he didn’t listen at all. Moreover, her aunt brought up something absurd. She informed Yiseo that she would rent out the room for half a day to the girls from the establishment while Yiseo and Yihwan were at school.

Yiseo fought tooth and nail, saying it was ridiculous, but her aunt seemed ready to kick her niece onto the street. Left with no choice, Yiseo stopped by the pawn shop she had seen on her way home from school and took off her last wristwatch. The shop owner opened the watch’s back cover, carefully examined the movement, and then held up two fingers to Yiseo.

“What? Uncle, is this real...? It’s a Benoa gold-plated watch, and that’s all it’s worth?”

“I can tell it’s real from looking at it. But it’s just a watch, without a guarantee or a case. And it has initials on the back, so this is already a good price.”

It was a watch her father had specially ordered with Yiseo’s initials engraved for her birthday. Yiseo looked down at the watch’s back for a long time, then ran her thumb across it and handed it to the owner.

She was vaguely rubbing the rough feel of the initials remaining on her finger after leaving the pawn shop.

“What did you pawn?”

Tae Mujin, who had arrived on his motorcycle without her noticing, asked. His eyes glanced from Yiseo to the pawn shop entrance and back.

Saying it was nothing, Yiseo put her empty hand into her jacket pocket. She didn’t want him to know that after all her tantrums about not taking his money, she had ended up selling her watch because she had no money.

Fortunately, Tae Mujin didn’t ask again. Instead, he took off his helmet and put it on Yiseo. By now, accustomed to the pattern, Yiseo got on the back of the motorcycle without a word. Then, his embracing back vibrated with a faint laugh.

Her spirits were low, and her mind was elsewhere for a moment. That’s why she belatedly realized that Tae Mujin’s motorcycle hadn’t stopped in front of her aunt’s house as usual.

“Where are we suddenly going?”

Pulled by Tae Mujin’s hand, she was led to the back of the prostitution establishment. A single thought flashed through Yiseo’s dumbfounded mind. Chills ran down her spine.

“No! I’m not going! Are you crazy?! Why would I come here!”

“You’ll see when we get there.”

“I thought it was strange when you offered me money. Bringing me ridiculous sandwiches and pretending to chew gum, but you’re really going to sell me, you bastard!!”

Tae Mujin stopped walking. He looked down at the agitated Yiseo with a slightly bewildered expression and said,

“Can’t you let anything go?”

He sighed and lightly tapped Yiseo’s forehead with the back of his hand, as if asking what on earth was in her small head. Then he took Yiseo’s hand and pulled her along.

Tae Mujin’s hand was large and thick like an animal’s paw, but his grip was surprisingly gentle, so she couldn’t pull away. Now that she thought about it, this was the first time he had held her hand, even though they had kissed so much.

Tae Mujin’s footsteps passed by the connecting row of cramped rooms. After crossing a narrow alley, barely wide enough for one person, a small detached house with a dark blue slate roof appeared. Tae Mujin slid open the aluminum accordion door with a rattling sound and pulled Yiseo inside.

From the outside, it looked no different from her aunt’s house, but surprisingly, the wallpaper inside was white, and the floor was smooth. The simple studio apartment, consisting only of neatly folded bedding, a two-shelf bookcase, and a built-in wardrobe, smelled of Tae Mujin. And entirely, not even a little, utterly incongruously. An electronic piano was placed by the window. Tae Mujin pulled Yiseo’s hand towards it and said,

“Practice here during vacation. You can also connect headphones if it’s noisy outside.”

As Yiseo kept her eyes on Tae Mujin instead of the piano, his head tilted slightly. Why? Isn’t this it? At his question, she reflexively blurted out,

“Electronic pianos... the touch gets ruined, so professional players don’t usually play them.”

“Hmm.”

Her solar plexus ached at the sight of Tae Mujin’s troubled face, which she had never seen before. So why do you do things I didn’t ask for? I’ve never even thanked you, so why do you keep doing this? Guilt, instead, turned into anger directed at Tae Mujin.

The sound was similar. Tae Mujin pressed the piano keys and said they could go together tomorrow to choose another one. The meaningless sounds Tae Mujin made permeated every corner of the empty room. Yiseo pictured Tae Mujin at the store, pressing each key like this, listening intently to the sounds.

Yiseo put her arms around Tae Mujin’s neck. She pulled his rigid face closer. Even though she didn’t exert much force, Tae Mujin, who was like a rock mountain, was pulled in too easily. Cowardly, just as she always had, instead of saying thank you, she pressed her lips to his. Tae Mujin froze as if holding his breath, then in the next moment, he suddenly pulled Yiseo into a fierce embrace.

“Ugh, mm...”

The pressure from his arms was so strong it made her moan, and Yiseo realized how gently Tae Mujin had treated her until now. She gasped as her breath was squeezed out, but it was swallowed by Tae Mujin’s mouth and unheard. Her breath stopped for a moment, and her head spun. All strength left her body, and she went limp in Tae Mujin’s arms. She closed her eyes for a moment and opened her mouth wide, accepting the kiss that felt like she was being devoured.

She came to her senses when his lips slowly parted and she met Tae Mujin’s eyes. The usual coolness was gone. His dark pupils were filled with a dimly shining heat.

She didn’t know much about men, but her body instinctively sensed what the murky look in Tae Mujin’s eyes meant. She felt like she had caused some kind of trouble. From here on... she was afraid to handle it. Yiseo’s body trembled subtly. Tae Mujin looked down at her, then, with a short sigh, willingly stepped back.

Yiseo quickly turned her back to Tae Mujin and sat down in front of the bookcase. She ran her hand over her flushed neck, absently scanning the spines of the books. She had hoped there might be some comic books to break the awkward silence between them.

Most of the books were on philosophy, classics, history, and business management.

“...Did you read all of these?”

Tae Mujin had already opened the window and was habitually trying to light the cigarette in his mouth. But when his eyes met Yiseo’s, he frowned and tossed the cigarette and lighter onto the windowsill.

“No, I just put them there for decoration.”

She pulled one out and flipped through it. There were no underlines or folded pages, but the corners were frayed and worn. When Yiseo gave him a sidelong glance, Tae Mujin ran a hand through his hair and smiled faintly.

“The person who used to give me work gave them to me to read a long time ago. Said that if you want to rip people off, you have to see right through their minds. He said he was doing well in business before he lost everything to gambling, but who knows. He was such a good liar.”

“What did you do under him?”

“Various things at the gambling house. Breaking up fights between gamblers, collecting money from those who tried to run off without paying.”

Tae Mujin spoke indifferently, as if he had just worked a convenience store part-time job. Sure enough, the rumors were true. If so... then it was probably true that he also acted as a pimp.

The thought made her solar plexus prickle. How many women had frequented this room, just like her now...? To quickly shake it off, Yiseo blurted out any question.

“So, did reading them help?”

Tae Mujin’s gaze briefly went out the window. It wasn’t bad for making money, but still, he twisted his lips and added,

“Given that he just left like that himself, I guess they really were just for decoration.”

When she asked if he had gone abroad or something, Tae Mujin laughed soundlessly and nodded. His eyes were fixed on her, so Yiseo turned her gaze back to the bookcase.

In the middle of the bookcase, a wooden box carved from wood served as a bookend. The box was full of coins, and a single coin placed separately in front caught her eye.

Ah... she finally remembered. The day she first rode Tae Mujin’s motorcycle, he had picked out one of the coins she had given him instead of bus fare. She remembered it because it was a coin with an unusually worn edge. Why would he collect something like this...? Now that she thought about it, strangely, all the coins had a specific year stamped on them.

“Why did you collect these?”

Tae Mujin tapped his cigarette pack, then seemed to give up, pulling out a piece of gum from his pocket and unwrapping it as he spoke.

“It’s like a kind of charm.”

“A charm?”

“Gamblers are obsessed with superstitions. They’ll wear the same clothes they wore on a winning day for a whole year without washing them, or even get their favorite card tattooed on their body. Only the operator makes money at a gambling house. But they still wear that kind of crude thing as a charm and stupidly lose money every day.”

“...Do you believe in superstitions like that too?”

“Not really.” Tae Mujin put the gum in his mouth, and his usually expressionless face, which always seemed to dislike sweet tastes, wrinkled slightly.

“Then why did you collect them?”

“One day, a regular customer made a huge fuss. Said his lucky coin chip had broken. Chips rarely break, but he went berserk with half-crazed eyes, so I kicked him out. That night, he hanged himself in the mountains.”

“What?... No, how could something like that happen? Why suddenly?”

“For people in this business, it’s like a drug. They know it won’t work, but they’re intoxicated by the pleasure of ‘what if,’ ‘just in case.’ If they didn’t even have that, they’d die right away.”

Yiseo hugged her arms, chilled by the extreme story. Tae Mujin spit the gum onto the wrapper, folded it in half, and pressed it firmly. Then, he strode towards Yiseo.

“It’s pathetic, but at that point, I also got curious. Why do people get so addicted and immerse themselves in it? I wasn’t interested in gambling, but at that time, it just happened to be coins that caught my eye, so I just gambled on that.”

From Tae Mujin, who had approached closely, came the lingering scent of recently spit-out gum.

“...So, by collecting them, did you understand what it felt like?”

A low chuckle escaped his lips.

No, no matter how many coins you collect, they’re just coins, he mumbled, and his lips pressed against hers.

She closed her eyes, thinking that a sweet-scented kiss truly didn’t suit Tae Mujin.

“Mujin, are you inside?”

His lips parted at the sound of someone calling him from outside the door. His already cool eyes sharpened, making her feel a cold draft. Tae Mujin clucked his tongue, went to the entrance, and rattled open the accordion door.

“Oh, you were home... Huh? Yoon Yiseo?”

His eyes met those of a boy who was peeking inside from outside the door. Kwon Giseon’s eyes widened, scanning Yoon Yiseo up and down in the room. As far as Kwon Giseon knew, this was the first time Tae Mujin had brought anyone into his home. Tae Mujin slammed the door shut, blocking his view.

“I told you not to come looking for me at home.”

“Oh? Oh, sorry. Hyung-nim Ilwon said he needed to check something with you regarding the house ledgers. He keeps calling me because you’re not answering.”

Tae Mujin gestured with a finger, as if telling him to talk somewhere else. Following behind Tae Mujin, Kwon Giseon glanced at the closed door. It was strange that Tae Mujin, who had no interest in school, had been attending frequently recently.

Kwon Giseon had left his poor and violent home early and survived by gambling at school. His goal was to join the Seowonpa gang right after graduation, but he met Tae Mujin and changed his target to him. Even to someone like him, who had rolled around the bottom of Seoryeong quite a bit, Tae Mujin was different. It wasn’t just his innate physique and overwhelming use of violence. Tae Mujin possessed a natural coolness; he never got excited, whether using violence or at the gambling table. His judgments were always accurate, and his execution was ruthless. Even when the Seowonpa offered him an unprecedented position and sum, Tae Mujin casually ignored them. He had lived in the red-light district but had never been seen bringing a woman into his room. But Yoon Yiseo...

Tae Mujin, who was walking ahead, suddenly looked back. Kwon Giseon flinched for a moment, thinking Tae Mujin was looking at him, but Tae Mujin’s gaze was directed at the front door they had just exited. At that moment, he had the strange illusion that his usually unyielding eyes had wavered slightly. He must have been mistaken. As Tae Mujin looked forward and walked again, Kwon Giseon quickly shook off that illusion.

As Tae Mujin led Kwon Giseon somewhere, their voices grew fainter and faded away.

Left alone, Yiseo pressed the piano keys, counted the coins, and then, when Tae Mujin still didn’t return after a long time, she picked up a book from the shelf and sat down. The floor was so hot that her bottom tingled.

The house she lived in in Seoul was Western-style, so she rarely sat on the floor, and her aunt’s house was always freezing because the heating was never on. This was the first time she had felt such a warm floor, and after sitting for about five minutes, her body felt sluggish, as if she had soaked in hot water. She subtly leaned against the folded blanket in the corner.

The book she picked up at random was Camus’s The Stranger. The edges of the book were worn from use, and it was challenging from the first page. Her eyes, following the text, slowly slowed down, then flickered like a broken light bulb on the third page.

“Yoon Yiseo... are you really sleeping?”

She was halfway between sleep and reality when she heard Tae Mujin’s voice. A low voice, mixed with a slight hint of amusement, echoed in her ears.

“You were making such a fuss and on edge earlier. Now you’re sleeping like this?”

The book she had forgotten she was holding gently slipped away. The blanket she was leaning against shifted. Soon after, a cozy and warm sensation enveloped her body. Tae Mujin wrapped Yiseo’s body in the blanket and kissed and rubbed against her cheek, temple, and forehead. Yiseo found it annoying but let him be, as the overwhelming sleep was too sweet.

“It’s warm for the first time in a long time... The floor... makes me so sleepy...”

The rain of kisses stopped. Soon after, a low voice, sounding angry, asked,

“Are you telling me they don’t even turn on the heat in that house?”

“...What heat...? There’s no hot water either... It feels like torture every time I wash... Yihwan goes to school without even washing...”

Things she would normally be too embarrassed to say flowed from her lips in her half-asleep state. A long sigh tickled Yiseo’s cheek. A large hand repeatedly stroked her hair. The ripple-like rhythm gently pushed away her remaining faint consciousness.

As Yiseo fell asleep with regular breaths, Tae Mujin picked up the coins Yiseo had thrown into the box.

He started collecting coins of the same year due to a trivial coincidence.

It began with a coin his mother gave him for an errand before she left home, sending him outside. The item his mother asked him to buy wasn’t sold at the store, and when he returned home empty-handed, his mother was gone with her belongings. Tae Mujin had forgotten about that coin, which he had placed on the bookshelf, for several years. He also threw useless coins from tips received from gamblers onto the bookshelf.

And after Mr. Choi’s funeral, returning home, he threw a few banknotes and coins, the last things found on his body, onto the shelf. The haphazardly piled coins caught his eye that day.

Strangely, all of them had the same year embossed on them, and coincidentally, it matched the year Tae Mujin was born. Seeing that, Tae Mujin gave a dry laugh. He thought if this was luck, it was truly pitiful luck. Originally, Tae Mujin had no desire, hope, or even interest in what he couldn’t have. He instinctively separated what he could have from what he couldn’t. Thus, he could thoroughly observe the people of Seoryeong, who fell into dreams and became addicted, with the eyes of an outsider. Mr. Choi, his mother, and his sister all plunged into vain dreams, unaware that they were actually a quagmire. So he collected the coins. To mourn them, to scoff at them, and to be wary. But...

Yiseo made a sound, hmm, and stirred. Tae Mujin stroked Yiseo’s hair and looked at the coin she had given him. Strangely, the moment he saw the coin in Yiseo’s small palm, Tae Mujin felt a small ripple. It was a strange sensation. Something he hadn’t known existed spread, causing ripples from the coin Yiseo had thrown.

Tae Mujin tried to ignore that feeling. His instincts classified it as something to be cut off. He had presented the effective shield of being a woman he “managed,” so it was Yiseo’s business to handle it herself. After quitting the house, it was a busy period for him, learning work at a construction site. The Seowonpa thought he was putting on a show to raise his price, but Tae Mujin was quite fond of the work. The sight of buildings sprouting like mushrooms from bare ground, where there was nothing before, was better than seeing someone’s chair taken and them rolling on the floor. He had given all his money to his sister, so he had to start from scratch, but he considered it not bad.

However, the next day, as Tae Mujin left home for work, he stopped abruptly as he entered the snow-covered alleyway. The pristine white snow from last night was now covered in footprints and filth, turned into a muddy mess. It was impossible to tell where the snow ended and the mud began, trampled by dark shoe prints. The unremarkable sight was strangely repulsive.

‘Haa... Yoon Yiseo...’

He pictured Yiseo being torn apart by a pack of dogs, becoming as tattered as that mud, if he pretended not to notice today. Tae Mujin canceled his work and headed to school. He chuckled wryly at himself, driving his motorcycle at maximum speed, feeling impatient.

When he found Yoon Yiseo in the music room, she was playing the piano with an even straighter posture than usual. He let out a hollow laugh and sat in the back of the classroom. Yiseo seemed to glance at Tae Mujin for a moment, then soon focused on her playing.

Given her personality, he would have expected her to play something flashy to intimidate the other kids, but surprisingly, Yoon Yiseo was playing a quiet and gentle piece. As Yiseo played the piano, Tae Mujin felt that strange sensation again. This time, it was deeper and stronger. That sensation made his rock-like interior as soft as a mantle, creating ripples. A gentle melody, seemingly comforting, brought out emotions he hadn’t recognized. Longing, loneliness, and pain were stirred like dust, and then gently embraced and comforted.

It was as if a buzzing swarm of bees had entered his chest; to Tae Mujin, it was somewhat sudden and annoying. It was useless and only bothered him. So Tae Mujin sent these unnecessarily stirred emotions back to the person who had caused them.

Lumps of sorrow and comfort, pity and sympathy, pain and hope, flowed from Tae Mujin, who refused to accept them, and enveloped Yoon Yiseo. Yoon Yiseo, focused on the piano keys, glittered in the sunlight filtering through the window. Only then did everything seem to fall into place, fitting perfectly. The sight was pleasing, and Tae Mujin smiled contentedly.

“Mmm...”

Yiseo’s lips moved, and she stirred.

Tae Mujin tightly gripped the coin in his hand. Taking it is easy. Embracing Yiseo, who had been the first to kiss him, Tae Mujin debated whether to take her now, here, immediately. But seeing Yiseo quickly become afraid, like a small animal, Tae Mujin backed away.

That day, just before she was about to be lynched in the music room, he had asked the terrified girl who begged for help,

‘Why me?’

Perhaps Yiseo understood it as a refusal, and despair was overlaid on her face, but the question was a rhetorical one he had asked himself. Why can’t I leave you alone, Yoon Yiseo? What should I do?

Looking down at the sleeping Yiseo, Tae Mujin sighed deeply. What he could have and what he couldn’t, or what he wanted. Tae Mujin’s iron-clad boundary was wavering.

________________________________________

After returning from Tae Mujin’s house, Yiseo meticulously searched through her belongings, though there was nothing much to go through.

No matter how much she searched, she couldn’t find it. It was the remaining money after she paid her aunt a month’s rent with the money from selling the watch.

Last night, she secretly plugged in the electric blanket cord that Tae Mujin had gotten her. Sure enough, her aunt checked the electricity meter and threw a fit. So, to spite her, Yiseo presented her with the rent, including the electricity bill, and her aunt eyed her, asking where she got the money. When Yiseo didn’t answer, her aunt glanced at Yiseo’s wrist and scoffed, asking if she had sold her watch. Yiseo thought, Her intuition is like a ghost’s, and was glad she had only paid a month’s rent. There was no telling how her aunt’s words would change next month. And she had kept the remaining money safely in her bag...

She suspected her aunt, but she didn’t recall her aunt entering the room. Then, Yihwan, engrossed in his portable game console, caught Yiseo’s eye.

“Hey, where did you get that?”

“My friend lent it to me. Ah, what? Give it back!!”

Yihwan threw a fit as Yiseo snatched the game console.

A chill ran down Yiseo’s spine, and she flipped Yihwan’s bag inside out, shaking it vigorously. Among the spilled contents, a playing card fell out. Yiseo’s heart sank. And when she tore open a black plastic bag among the contents, it was full of 1,000-won bills and coins. Yiseo’s hand, gripping the bag, trembled faintly.

What she had heard when she first arrived in Seoryeong flashed through her mind. That large gambling rings were even held in schools here.

“You... what is this? You, don’t tell me...?”

“Don’t interfere, Sis.”

“Don’t interfere?! Where did you get this money? You searched my bag, didn’t you? What kind of money is this?! You’ve gone completely mad. Hey! Yoon Yihwan!!”

She grabbed Yihwan’s shoulder as he tried to leave the room, pretending not to hear her. Yihwan struggled, telling her to let go, and Yiseo’s hand couldn’t hold on. She was surprised at how strong he had gotten. When she wouldn’t let go of his neck, asking what he was doing to his sister, Yihwan sharply turned his head and said,

“You’re so damn annoying, not doing anything for me. You bitch.”

“...What?”

She wondered if her ears had deceived her.

Otherwise... how could her brother... As she faced his unfamiliar face, with eyes glaring as if possessed, all strength drained from her hands. Yihwan then left the room, and Yiseo, feeling as if all the blood had drained from her body, sank to the floor. Even though he had been playful, her brother had never genuinely defied her before. As she sat there in a daze, the cold from the floor seeped in.

Since coming to Seoryeong, she had put up a wall against everything related to Seoryeong. Only then could she justify her disgust for this hateful place.

However, seeing her brother, who had become so unfamiliar, she realized it had been a naive delusion. She thought she had only dipped her toes in, able to pull out at any time, but she had been denying, with her eyes closed, that the swamp had risen to her neck.

________________________________________

Tae Mujin listened quietly to Yiseo’s complaints, frowning when Yihwan swore.

“It’s the weekend tomorrow, so bring your brother and come out in front of the house in the morning.”

“And if I bring him out? He doesn’t listen to a word I say anymore.”

Saying it’s inconvenient to wash, Tae Mujin smiled, a rare curve to his eyes.

The next day, the place they forced Yihwan, who hated it, to go was a public bathhouse.

As soon as Yihwan saw Tae Mujin, he suddenly became docile. Mujin took him into the men’s bath, and Yiseo entered the women’s bath. It was her first time washing in a public facility other than a swimming pool, but she didn’t dislike the hot steam that immediately enveloped her upon entering.

She sat on a red plastic chair, repeatedly scrubbed with soap, and let the warm shower stream wash over her for a long time. Frankly, it felt like a lifesaver. Every morning, when she doused herself with cold water in the chilly, tiny bathroom, it felt like thousands of needles piercing her.

Feeling bold, she was about to enter the hot tub when she noticed familiar faces already sitting there. They were the women who sat on the establishment’s terrace. Unable to bring herself to enter the tub with them, she gave up and continuously kept the shower running until a bathhouse attendant scolded her, making her turn it off. She washed herself with the disposable shampoo, conditioner, and body gel that Tae Mujin had bought her at the entrance, then dried her hair for a long time with a hairdryer.

When she came out, Tae Mujin and Yihwan were sitting on a waiting room bench.

Yihwan’s face was pale, perhaps because he had washed for the first time in a while, or perhaps because he was utterly intimidated by Tae Mujin. As Yiseo approached, Tae Mujin lightly nudged Yihwan’s arm. Yihwan reluctantly stood up and held out what he had in his hand—a diamond-shaped banana-flavored milk.

“Sis, I was wrong... I’m sorry.”

His tone was as if he was reading something someone else had written. He completely ignored his own sister’s words, so was it really this simple? Yiseo felt a surge of anger at his deflated voice.

“Try acting like that again. Just once, try!”

Yiseo snatched the milk and smacked Yihwan on the head. Yihwan muttered he wouldn’t do it again, looking at Tae Mujin instead of his sister. Tae Mujin narrowed his eyes and nodded, and Yihwan slowly got up and walked to the entrance, then bolted out the door as soon as he stepped outside. At the sight, Yiseo clucked her tongue and asked,

“What did you say to Yihwan to make him so intimidated?”

“Well, I just told him to listen to his sister so he wouldn’t regret it later.”

“That’s all? He always ignored me, but look at him.”

She clenched her fist, annoyed to death, and Tae Mujin turned his head sideways, a slight smirk on his lips. The banana milk Yihwan had given her – or rather, that Tae Mujin had bought her – was very cold and sweet after the bath. When she asked Tae Mujin why he wasn’t drinking, he immediately shook his head, saying he hated sweet things. But the gum had been sweeter. Yiseo put the straw to her lips, her face flushed.

“He probably didn’t gamble entirely of his own free will.”

“You don’t need to take Yoon Yihwan’s side. You know what kind of money that is.”

“The kids who started the gambling probably forced him into it, trying to rip him off. When he was taking a bath, I saw some bruises on parts of his body that aren’t usually visible.”

The last mouthful of milk went down, chilling her throat.

“So… that’s why you told me to bring him to the bathhouse. To check for signs of a beating.”

“That wasn’t the only reason… it would be problematic if the woman I’m managing was tortured every morning.”

Yiseo couldn’t say anything, watching Tae Mujin’s lips curl.

“Don’t worry too much. It seems he wasn’t just taking it. He even gambled because he wanted to get one over on them. It probably didn’t go as planned, though. He’s quite spirited, like someone I know.”

Tae Mujin laughed, but Yiseo couldn’t. He had immediately seen through something that she, his own sister, hadn’t even suspected. As she just stared at him, Tae Mujin grabbed Yiseo’s arm and led her into a narrow alley. Their lips met instantly.

He said he hated sweet things. His mouth, tasting of banana milk, was thoroughly explored. Throughout the kiss, Tae Mujin smelled of disposable shampoo and body wash. Her own body carried the same scent. The feeling of sharing body scent with another person strangely tickled her heart.

Suddenly, Yiseo had a thought. If she hadn’t met Tae Mujin in Seoryeong…

“What are you thinking?”

Tae Mujin’s lips brushed Yiseo’s ear as he asked. If Tae Mujin wasn’t from a place like this… if he hadn’t been from here, and was in a more similar environment to her…

“Whenever you make that face, I don’t know what you’re thinking.”

Unable to answer, she bit her lip, and Tae Mujin urgently pressed his lips against hers again.

Her father’s calls were still nowhere to be found, and after the end of the year, the time for studying abroad would also pass. The piano, which she considered her whole world, was nothing but a paltry skill here. Vacation was next week. Never had the passage of time felt so unsettling to Yiseo.

What would become of her after this winter? It felt as if she was standing precariously at the threshold of the world, naked and unprepared. What should she hold on to? Her breathing grew ragged. Yiseo hugged Tae Mujin tightly, as if clinging to him, as he pressed against her.

________________________________________

Regardless of Yiseo’s anxiety, vacation began. Her aunt told Yiseo that since she had enough dexterity to play the piano, she should try working at a casino, and called an acquaintance who worked there.

At first, the employee, seemingly annoyed, told her to just come by, but upon seeing Yiseo, his eyes widened, and he asked her various questions. Although she was still a minor, she would be able to work immediately after her birthday, so he told her to come in for training starting tomorrow.

He even joked about raking in tips. The word “tip” made Yiseo’s brow furrow. But soon she scoffed at herself. It was ridiculous to feel unpleasant about money when she was there to earn it.

She went to get her uniform size, but in the end, she couldn’t wear it. Tae Mujin simply scoffed at Yiseo’s plan to work at the casino.

“Why are you laughing? They said the salary is quite good for this neighborhood. And tips… they said I could get a lot of tips…”

“I told you, you’re too vulnerable. Why do you think they give tips?”

“Well, if you do your job well… if the game goes well…”

“People go crazy when they suddenly get their hands on a lot of money. And they go crazier when they lose a lot. Do you think you’d last long in that environment? If you need money, just tell me.”

Seeing Yiseo, who would rather die than accept that, Tae Mujin’s scoff slowly turned into a sigh. He immediately called an acquaintance who worked at a ski resort.

________________________________________

The convenience store Tae Mujin got her into was located on the ski resort’s most difficult course, so there were few people. Yiseo sat at the counter all day, looking out the window.

The snowy mountains outside the window radiated dazzling light. Yiseo loved winter most among the four seasons, especially the snow that fell around her birthday. So every year around this time, she would happily visit this place. But now, the winter mountain looked like a prison, and she felt momentarily breathless.

As she stared blankly out the window, a black ski suit crossing a dizzying valley caught her eye. The black ski suit flowed gracefully down the mountain. Yiseo had received private lessons since she was young, but she was no match for that black ski suit. He must be an athlete or a physical education student, she thought, recalling her instructor’s words that proper form was helpful just to watch, and then she averted her gaze. It was meaningless for someone working at a convenience store.

“Is the work bearable?”

So, when the man in the black ski suit entered the store and asked, she was flustered. He picked up a stick of gum from the display and casually placed it on the counter.

“It was... you?”

Tae Mujin seemed to misunderstand the question and tilted his head, adding,

“I came here to work too. For snow removal.”

“...No, not that. When did you learn to ski?”

“Whenever I had time while working during peak season. Why, do you want to ski? Should I ask an employee I know to get you a night pass?”

Tae Mujin took a bottle of water from the refrigerator and offered it to her. As she scanned the water along with the gum, he immediately opened the cap and poured half into his mouth. Her eyes naturally followed Tae Mujin’s uniquely relaxed and slow movements. Now that she thought about it, the downhill skiing she saw earlier was very much like him. Tae Mujin had a unique aura that made everything revolve around him, anytime, anywhere.

The ski resort, which she had visited every year, had become so unfamiliar to her, yet Tae Mujin was no different from how he was in Seoryeong.

“Why are you even working at a ski resort... Weren’t you busy managing women?”

Tae Mujin coughed and laughed loudly for a moment. He chuckled, saying that managing her alone was overwhelming, then asked again. Is it bearable? When she replied that it was bearable except for being boring, he silently curved his lips and said he would pick her up when she finished.

After Tae Mujin left the store, a customer came in, put a drink on the counter, and asked,

“Excuse me, what time do you finish work?”

They were two men who looked to be college students.

“...I finish late.”

Yiseo didn’t really want to engage, so she opened the POS system and pretended to organize bills. The older-looking man among them spoke again.

“Aw, don’t be like that. This guy wanted to see your face again so badly, do you know how many laps we’ve been running on this tough course? It’s not like we’re training for a competition or anything.”

“Ah, Hyung, why are you like this... I’m sorry.”

The younger man bowed deeply, his face flushed. The older man gripped his companion’s shoulder tightly and smiled slyly.

“We’re staying in Building M, Room 00 at this resort. We’re gathering with friends today, so come over after you finish work. There are girls too, so you can be comfortable. Huh?”

The man subtly showed his wallet, pretending to pay, emphasizing that he wasn’t a strange person. A prestigious university student ID and a resort membership card. These weren’t things that particularly interested Yiseo. Moreover, the way he subtly spoke to her informally was unpleasant.

“I’m sorry. It’s against policy to socialize privately with customers.”

“Haha, I know a lot of employees here, and that’s the first I’ve heard of that.”

“Then you can socialize with those employees.”

The faces of the two men quickly hardened. Hoping they would leave quickly, Yiseo turned her back and started organizing the shelves. The older man continued, scoffing,

“We’re not that insignificant. The kids coming today are all really great, so just drop by for a bit. We’re not doing anything weird, just playing games and drinking some wine, so there’s no harm in coming, right?”

“Hyung... stop it. I’m sorry if we upset you.”

“No, what’s there to be upset about? If you come over and win a few games, you’ll probably take home more than a month’s salary working here.”

Yiseo’s hands, organizing the shelf, stopped.

Turning to face the man, she saw a strange confidence in his eyes, as if rejection wasn’t even a consideration.

Yiseo was speechless for a moment. She had never been treated this way before.

There had always been men who approached Yiseo rationally, and each time she had rejected them without much thought. Then, they would apologize and flounder.

Yiseo rubbed her throbbing forehead. What had changed? When she was bullied at school, Yiseo blamed the changed environment. But looking at the sneering man’s attitude, it wasn’t the environment that had changed, but herself. More precisely, her circumstances had changed. Realizing this, deep frustration and anger surged within her.

“...You’re meeting in Building M?”

“Yeah! We’re gathering from 7 PM, but you can come anytime. What time did you say you finish work...?”

“What, it’s the cheapest seasonal room then.”

“What?!”

The man’s face immediately flushed. Yiseo was well-versed in resort memberships too. She always stayed in the penthouse suite here.

“You were talking about my salary, so I thought you were at least staying in the penthouse building. What kind of games do you play in that tiny room in Building M? And I saw you skiing earlier, it was terrible. It seems like you’ll have to try really hard in today’s game. You should use that money for private lessons.”

“What did you just say?!”

His companion held back the man, whose veins were bulging. Accusations poured from beyond the counter. This convenience store clerk is a bit good-looking, so we talked to her, and she’s getting cocky. Don’t you know how many employees I know here? Don’t you dare. Yiseo didn’t back down either. Don’t interfere with my business, go quickly and tell on me. And you two should get helmets and goggles surgically attached to your faces.

“Yah, f***. I’m hearing all sorts of crap because of this beggarly bitch. You, come out. Let’s go to customer service right now, and let’s see if you can look them straight in the eye and talk back like this... Ugh!!!”

In an instant, the man was grabbed by the scruff of his neck and dragged out of the store. His companion and Yiseo, startled, ran out of the building.

The man was being kicked and rolled around like a snowman by Tae Mujin’s feet.

A groan erupted, then was covered by new groans from another barrage of kicks. His trembling companion pulled out his phone, seemingly to call the police. At that moment, Tae Mujin grabbed the man’s arm and twisted it at an odd angle, and a dull crack echoed.

“Tae Mujin, stop! Stop it!!”

The muscles on Tae Mujin’s back, which she was clutching, swelled menacingly. The fallen man mumbled, swearing he wouldn’t let it go, that he’d kill him, and only then did Yiseo become afraid. This was a different kind of person than the kids at Seosang High who couldn’t utter a peep against Tae Mujin. Tae Mujin pressed down on the mumbling man’s hand, burying it in the snow, and spoke lowly,

“Come to Seoryeong, address 00.”

Confusion spread across the man’s pain-filled eyes.

“Come there and find Tae Mujin.”

Only then did the man, who had been spewing insults, fall silent. He seemed to know too. That the address Tae Mujin had given was Seoryeong Village, where brothels were concentrated. And Tae Mujin’s aura and violence that was not of an ordinary person. His attitude of not caring about the aftermath.

Guessing he was a gang member, the man clutched his broken arm and, supported by his companion, disappeared towards the station.

________________________________________

Yiseo was led down to the ski resort entrance, held by Tae Mujin’s hand. Tae Mujin was silent the entire time they walked, and when they reached the parking lot, he handed Yiseo her helmet.

“What are you going to do? I barely lasted a month, and now I’m going to get fired.”

“I’ll find you another job. Get on.”

“You dump me in the middle of a mountain whenever you feel like it, and now you’re making me quit. What are you trying to do?”

Even with Yiseo’s sharp words, Tae Mujin inexplicably had a smiling face. He put the helmet on the dumbfounded Yiseo and buckled the strap.

“They’re not like the kids at Seosang High who can’t say a peep to you.”

“Let’s get dinner before we go home. Think about what you want to eat.”

“Is food the problem? From what I heard earlier, they seem to be quite well-off, so what if they report you?”

“There’s a good place to eat near here. It’ll take 30 minutes, so bear with the cold.”

“Tae Mujin!!”

“It’s your birthday today.”

So let’s just eat, Tae Mujin’s low voice made Yiseo fall silent. How did he know? Yiseo quietly got on the motorcycle and hugged Tae Mujin’s back.

The neighborhood Tae Mujin took her to was a busy street, typical of a college town, with quite a few pubs and cafes. Having been cooped up in Seoryeong, the bustling street felt unfamiliar.

Yiseo walked aimlessly, holding Tae Mujin’s hand. Tae Mujin told her to pick something since it was her birthday, and Yiseo shook her head. She wasn’t in the mood. Today marked her becoming an adult. Without any preparation. As if someone had forcibly pushed her.

“...How did you know it was my birthday?”

“I heard.”

From whom? she asked, but Tae Mujin went into a store filled with piercings without answering.

Most of the items in the store were kooky or ethnic designs that young students would like. Her tastes weren’t for that, so she just stared blankly, and Tae Mujin looked at the price tags, picked the most expensive piercing, and handed it to the owner. It was a simple piercing with a grayish rough diamond in a yellow gold bezel. It looked best to Yiseo’s eyes too, so she didn’t bother to refuse.

“Is this spot okay?”

The owner put a black dot on Yiseo’s earlobe and held out a hand mirror. Yiseo turned her head to check the position of the dot, then nodded, slightly tense.

“Ah...!”

In an instant, the needle pierced her delicate flesh.

It didn’t hurt much, but her cheek twitched. Tae Mujin’s eyebrows, watching from the side, also furrowed. Yiseo bit her lip to suppress a laugh. It was funny how Tae Mujin, who could nonchalantly break other people’s limbs, reacted to this tiny injury.

As she checked in the mirror, Tae Mujin’s fingers traced her earlobe. As her reddened, tender flesh was gently rubbed between Tae Mujin’s thumb and forefinger, she felt more nervous than when her ear was pierced. It felt like her most delicate and soft part was being touched by Tae Mujin.

When they left the store, it was snowing. The world was white, as if a white filter had been placed over her vision. As she walked, holding Tae Mujin’s hand, her mind cleared, like the streetscape. Tae Mujin’s strides were long, so Yiseo kept falling behind. Each time, Tae Mujin would turn back, his face momentarily blurred by the pelting snow, then sharpen as he pulled her hand again.

It was a scene she had never imagined when she vaguely pictured her first day as an adult.

There was still no contact from her father, and the time for studying abroad had passed. She had to pay rent, but she had also lost her part-time job. And above all, she never thought she would be walking around with a man like this bandit.

Yet… while holding Tae Mujin’s hand and wandering aimlessly, everything seemed bothersome. The unfamiliar place, the vision blurring like a dream, and Tae Mujin’s hot hand, the only thing that told her it was real.

It’ll work out somehow. She snapped the string of anxiety and mumbled, whatever happens, happens. Then, her heart felt light, like the street that had emptied as people went indoors to avoid the snow. It was a little… enjoyable.

After aimlessly walking for a long time, Yiseo chose a hamburger for her birthday meal. When Tae Mujin furrowed his brow, asking if that was enough, Yiseo replied that she had been wanting a hamburger for a long time. Tae Mujin mumbled, ‘So you just liked bread all along,’ and headed to the nearest fast-food restaurant.

________________________________________

“Those guys from earlier, you know. They got really scared when you just gave them the address. It’s funny, after all that showing off.”

Yiseo chattered on about anything until they arrived at her house, and Tae Mujin smiled silently. Getting off the motorcycle, Tae Mujin brushed the snow from Yiseo’s hair. He lightly held her waist and helped her down. Their lips met immediately. Tae Mujin’s lips were chillingly cold, but the flesh inside his mouth was hot. Tae Mujin kissed Yiseo’s cheek and forehead, then stared intently at the earring clinging to her earlobe. Then he carefully ran his tongue over it.

“Ah, don’t. It tickles!”

It had been a more enjoyable birthday than expected, and Tae Mujin’s embrace was now quite familiar. At the ticklish sensation, Yiseo burst into laughter. Then, Tae Mujin’s usually impassive dark pupils wavered. Tae Mujin suddenly hugged her so tightly it felt like she would be crushed, and Yiseo gasped for breath. Tae Mujin buried his face in Yiseo’s shoulder and mumbled, Should we just leave together, anywhere?

“...What? Leave... Suddenly, where?”

Tae Mujin said to pack their bags, take Yihwan, and get on a bus. Anywhere close was fine, or Busan, or even Seoul if she liked.

“Keep playing the piano too. It’ll be hard to study abroad, but go to college. I’ll take care of Yihwan too. At least it’ll be better than here.”

Those words, instead, dragged Yiseo back to reality. The happy feeling, as if her feet were floating, quickly deflated like a burst balloon. Piano...? Does Tae Mujin know how much my monthly lesson fee is?

Suddenly, the electronic piano placed by the window in his room came to mind. Yiseo had told him to refund it, saying studying abroad was hopeless now, but Tae Mujin seemed to have left it there. In his room, which didn’t get much sunlight, yet placed by the window where the most light came in. Thus, it was a poignant and humble sight, like a small animal curling up to bask in the light.

“Even as an empty promise… I can’t tell you I can provide the same life you had before. Still.”

Tae Mujin pulled something from his jacket’s inner pocket and fastened it around Yiseo’s wrist. The cold touch of the metal constricted her throat. She didn’t need to flip it over to know. The wristwatch Tae Mujin had put on her surely had her initials engraved on it. She couldn’t say anything. She just stared blankly at the snow piling on Tae Mujin’s shoulder.

“I can do anything, say anything. Anywhere is fine, let’s go.”

Tae Mujin’s words spread out like a dream. The scene of her going straight to her room, packing, taking Yihwan’s hand, and the three of them getting on a late-night bus and driving all night. But the imagination stopped there. What would happen after they got off the bus? She couldn’t imagine anything at all.

“...Dad will contact me. He said he’d call Aunt. I have to wait here.”

Remembering the place she had to return to, she instantly pulled out of the dreamlike state Tae Mujin had brought her into.

“You’ve been thinking about going back from the start, haven’t you?”

Tae Mujin smiled bitterly. He told her to go inside and, for the first time, turned his back to her first. Tae Mujin’s retreating figure in the snow flurries looked like an old tree that had shed all its leaves in midwinter. Yiseo’s lips trembled. As if Tae Mujin’s back would disappear forever. She wanted to leave Seoryeong, where he was, yet she didn’t want to leave with him either, and now she was anxious about his back, which he had turned first.

“Tae Mujin!”

Tae Mujin stopped walking and turned around.

Yiseo put her hand in her pocket and fiddled with the coins. She had never thanked him. Instead, she had kept the change she received while working at the convenience store, exchanging it for her own money. Stepping towards Tae Mujin, Yiseo asked,

“When’s your birthday?”

It already passed, why? Tae Mujin raised an eyebrow and asked back.

Instead of thanks, she took the coins from her pocket and offered them. It was just two 500-won coins, five 100-won coins, and one 10-won coin. The same number as the year engraved on the coins piled on Tae Mujin’s bookshelf. That was all she could give him in return.

And yet, Tae Mujin… looked down at Yiseo’s palm for a long time, then picked up the coins. He held them up to the dim streetlight.

He said coins were just coins, no matter how many you collected. Tae Mujin flipped the coins one by one, his eyes curving. Then, the deep scar on his cheek deepened like a dimple.

Only then did Yiseo realize, once again, that he was also a boy her age. She stared blankly at Tae Mujin’s smiling face.

________________________________________

The next day, she received a call from the ski resort where she thought she had been fired.

At the urging question of why she hadn’t come to work, Yiseo hurriedly left the house. However, given that her workplace had changed from the convenience store to the season pass issuance desk, it seemed that Tae Mujin had put in a word for her.

“Then please fill out the application form and give it to me with your ID.”

It was a chaotic moment, issuing season passes for a group of elementary school students. The man in front of her was holding an application form and looking down at Yiseo. The man’s eyes widened. His face, full of surprise and welcome, looked somewhat familiar. Who was he? As Yiseo furrowed her brow, trying to remember, the man said in a slightly excited voice,

“Yiseo. It’s me, Han Jong-hun! Jihyo’s twin brother.”

At his words, memories from Seoul that she had suppressed resurfaced. Jihyo was a friend who received lessons from the same professor. She had exchanged greetings with him a few times when he visited his sister, and at Jihyo’s suggestion, the three of them had once had tea.

“I was really surprised when I heard you suddenly transferred. But meeting you like this, wow... it’s truly amazing.”

“Yeah... things happened, so that’s how it turned out.”

Yiseo felt a little awkward at Jong-hun’s face, which seemed more moved than just happy. To simply welcome someone she knew from Seoul... the place they met was very uncomfortable. Fortunately, with customers pushing behind him, Jong-hun reluctantly stepped aside. And after work, as she was gathering her things to leave, she encountered him again sitting on a bench in the hallway.

“Yiseo, can you spare a moment? If it’s okay, let’s have dinner together.”

Four hours had passed since their earlier encounter... Unable to refuse, Yiseo nodded.

Jong-hun suggested going to a restaurant, but Yiseo didn’t want to drag things out, so she chose a nearby food court. At Jong-hun’s suggestion to choose anything she wanted, she only ordered a cup of Americano. Jong-hun immediately filled a tray with coffee, cake, macarons, and cookies, then sat across from Yiseo, smiling brightly.

“I thought you liked sweets.”

They had only gone to a cafe together once, but Jong-hun had a good memory. She thanked him and took a sip of coffee. She had no appetite to chew anything.

“Is Jihyo doing well?”

“Yes. She seems busy these days. She made a big fuss packing for her departure. She’ll be back soon anyway during vacation, but she’s making such a fuss...”

Jong-hun, who had been answering Yiseo’s question happily, suddenly stopped talking, a look of dismay on his face. Jihyo was preparing to study abroad on a similar path to Yiseo. Seeing that she was leaving the country, it seemed she had been accepted into university, and given that Jong-hun remained silent... he seemed to vaguely guess her situation. The coffee in her mouth tasted unusually bitter, and Yiseo licked her lips. Jong-hun’s cheeks subtly reddened as he watched her.

“Is it okay for you to live here? If there’s anything I can help with, just tell me. Anything I...”

“Did you hear any rumors about me?”

Did a rumor spread that I went bankrupt and ran away? She had come down here without telling her friends anything precisely to avoid this. When Yiseo reacted sharply, Jong-hun waved his hand, saying no. He looked at Yiseo for a long time, then lowered his head to the table and sighed deeply.

“There are no such rumors. When you suddenly transferred like that, I was a bit... stressed. So I looked into things a bit...”

“Looked into what?”

“After hearing about your father’s company, I wondered if there was anything I could do to help. When I heard you transferred nearby, I came just in case. My family usually goes to a different ski resort. Wow, but meeting you in person, I was truly surprised earlier...”

“Wait, what did you just say?”

“You said you transferred to Seosang High...”

“No, not that, before that. You said you heard about my dad’s company!”

At Jong-hun’s words, her dazed mind suddenly cleared, as if doused with cold water.

“I haven’t heard anything from my dad since I came here. I suspected the company was in trouble, but... what did you hear?”

A ominous feeling settled as Jong-hun’s face quickly hardened. The situation she heard from the hesitant Jong-hun surpassed Yiseo’s anxiety. Her father’s company had already been declared bankrupt a month ago, and although he seemed to have aimed for corporate rehabilitation, the talk of stagnation echoed like a nightmare in Yiseo’s ears. Now, she had no way of knowing her father’s whereabouts.

“Haa... I thought it was serious since there was no contact... No, and I didn’t even know that... ugh...”

“Yiseo... Yiseo, I’m sorry.”

The tears she had held back since coming to Seoryeong burst forth like a broken dam. Jong-hun, though not at fault at all, kept repeating apologies, not knowing what to do.

“Hmph, what’s Dad doing alone... Haa, I don’t know what to do anymore...”

“Then... should I try to find out?”

At his words, Yiseo looked up and met the eyes of the boy in front of her. It was the first time she had looked at Jong-hun so closely. Jong-hun carefully wiped Yiseo’s cheeks with a paper towel and said,

“My cousin brother is in the prosecutor’s office. Actually, I asked him to look into your father’s situation.”

“...Can he really find out?”

“I’ll ask him. My brother graduated from the police academy, so he has a lot of connections in the police agency too.”

Now that she thought about it, the impressive family connections Jihyo used to boast about vaguely came to mind. Jihyo’s family, starting from her father, had many relatives working in the legal profession, and Jong-hun was diligently following in their footsteps. Conversations she had hardly paid attention to before now couldn’t be ignored.

“What if something happened to Dad... Why else wouldn’t he contact me... Haa...”

“Don’t worry too much. He’s probably just busy dealing with the company. Still, I’ll try my best to find out.”

As her anxiety became reality, she felt dizzy, as if she were falling. Her reeling mind was too disoriented to notice.

“Yiseo, I... I was worried about you. I was so worried I couldn’t bear it.”

A feeling of discomfort came from the touch of skin on her cheek, not paper towel, and Yiseo raised her head. Jong-hun, who had moved to the seat beside her, had his arm around her back and was patting her. The hand gently cupping her cheek wiped away her tears.

She flinched at the embrace and started to pull back.

At the entrance to the food court, a familiar back appeared. Tae Mujin’s faded jumper, which he always wore. Only then did she remember his words about picking her up when she finished, but even long after her shift ended, neither Tae Mujin nor his motorcycle were in sight.

________________________________________

Yiseo strained her ears towards the window. She had been waiting all day, knowing she would recognize the sound of his motorcycle engine just by hearing it. It was close to midnight. The engine noise faintly echoed, as if it had just entered the alley. She rushed out, hastily slipping her bare feet into rubber slippers, and ran into the alley.

“Tae Mujin!”

He must have seen her, but the motorcycle passed by indifferently. Tae Mujin, whom she hadn’t seen in a week, parked his motorcycle in the empty lot and glanced at Yiseo as he took off his helmet. Their eyes met, but he turned to walk away, and a desperate voice burst from her.

“Why are you suddenly like this to me? Why are you ignoring me?!”

Tae Mujin sighed briefly and finally met her gaze. His black pupils seemed unusually cold, making her exposed feet feel as if they were stepping on ice.

“It’s what you wanted. Now that you don’t have to go to school, there’s no need to carry that dirty reputation.”

“...You said you’d manage me. Are you not doing it anymore?”

Manage? Tae Mujin scoffed. His lips curled, but his eyes didn’t.

“It seems there are plenty of people to manage you, even if I don’t.”

“...Are you talking about the guy I was with at the food court? I think you’re misunderstanding something…”

“Misunderstanding or not, I don’t care.”

Tae Mujin turned his head, his face showing genuine disinterest. Then he opened the iron gate and went inside. “Tae Mujin! Tae Mujin!!” She called out, making the alley echo, but only the click of the lock returned.

Hot tears streamed down her frozen cheeks, making her skin prickle. Yiseo couldn’t move her feet and glared at the tightly closed iron gate. Her body grew colder and colder, but with no sign of him, she reluctantly headed home.

“Ah! Ugh...”

She stopped, a piercing pain in the sole of her foot. The slipper strap had broken, and it seemed she had stepped on something. She grunted, trying to check the injured area on one foot, lost her balance, and fell. Her palms scraped against the ground as she fell, leaving numerous gashes. A groan escaped her lips. A piece of broken glass was embedded in the sole of her foot.

“You shouldn’t be doing this to me, you bastard!”

She sobbed, cursing Tae Mujin.

She wanted him to comfort her. That her company had gone bankrupt. That she didn’t even know her father’s whereabouts. If only Tae Mujin would hold her tightly in his strong arms and tell her it would be okay, then everything would truly be okay...

Click. The sound of the gate opening made Yiseo’s shoulders tremble. And then the sound of approaching footsteps. They were unusually fast and anxious. Soon after, a long shadow, backlit by the streetlamp, enveloped Yiseo.

Tae Mujin knelt down and examined Yiseo’s foot. His expression was hidden by the backlighting. He sighed deeply at her bloodied foot, then swiftly hoisted Yiseo onto his back. Even though he was quite tall, she felt safe as she was carried on his rock-like back. She tightly hugged Tae Mujin’s neck. In his large hand, which gripped Yiseo’s calf, was her broken slipper. The dangling slipper, following his steps, made her feel like crying again for some reason. She buried her face in his broad back.

________________________________________

“Ah... it hurts...”

“It doesn’t look like it needs stitches, though.”

The small foot in Tae Mujin’s hand was being painted with red disinfectant. Tae Mujin’s hands were as big as pot lids, looking like bear paws, but his movements while applying the bandage were delicate and gentle.

“That guy at the food court... he’s a friend’s brother I knew from Seoul. Don’t misunderstand.”

“I told you I don’t care.”

“Then why are you doing this to me? You used to pick me up every day, but you haven’t come for a whole week.”

Even after finishing the treatment, Tae Mujin held Yiseo’s foot in his hand and fiddled with it.

“I don’t care what bastard you mess around with. No matter who you cling to, you’re always just scheming to escape anyway.”

“...What? You said we weren’t anything. Don’t talk to me like that! Ah...!”

At that moment, her breath hitched from the strong grip on her ankle. It didn’t hurt, but Tae Mujin’s hand gripping her ankle felt like a press machine, making her afraid. Even when she tried to pull her foot away, it didn’t budge.

“Ah, what are you doing now? Let go! I said let go!”

“What should I do? If I give it a little force, it’ll probably snap nicely and dangle.”

“Are you crazy!”

When she screamed, Tae Mujin took his gaze from Yiseo’s foot and only raised his eyes. The chilling gaze pierced straight through her, giving her goosebumps. His dark pupils were so black and deep that she couldn’t tell where the bottom was.

“At least you won’t be able to run away until your leg heals, right? Once it heals, I can just break it again. Should I keep breaking it until you can’t even think about running away?”

Tae Mujin laughed, his lips curving. He slowly dragged his finger along the arch of her sole, rubbing between her toes as if massaging them. Goosebumps spread throughout her body, starting from her toes.

“Don’t try to scare me like that. It won’t work on me.”

Yiseo, instead of struggling, relaxed her legs and glared at Tae Mujin.

She was serious. She had seen Tae Mujin snap other people’s limbs like chopsticks many times, but she was certain he would never do that to her.

“Ugh...!”

Tae Mujin instantly moved on top of Yiseo, pressing his lips onto hers. She hated the forceful kiss and twisted her head, but his strong grip pressed her cheek, forcing it back into place. She frantically pushed his shoulders and chest, and their lips barely parted.

Tae Mujin crossed his arms and ripped off his T-shirt. Only then did Yiseo become afraid. The rock-like muscles, packed without a single gap, rippled as they looked down at Yiseo. Immediately, he covered Yiseo’s body like a landslide.

No, don’t, you bad bastard, you crazy lunatic. Insults tumbled from her mouth incoherently but were soon swallowed by Tae Mujin’s mouth. The hot, full flesh in her mouth was violent. He mercilessly thrust his tongue, as if planting a flag in his territory. Saliva dripped from the corners of her mouth. "Yoon Yiseo, Yoon Yiseo, fuck Yiseo," Tae Mujin whispered Yiseo’s name in her ear.

“I told you this is nothing.”

“Tae Mujin, ha, don’t! Don’t!!”

Her legs were spread, and Tae Mujin’s thigh pushed between them. Something hard touched her thigh, rubbing against her haphazardly. Realizing it was his center, her suppressed sobs burst forth.

“You don’t know what these women here have to endure for paltry money. There are women whose intestines ruptured from being punched in the stomach for an hour, told to tighten around a dick. Fuck, there are even bastards who shove beer bottles up their ass, telling them to drink it. And what, you pay with a kiss?”

Tae Mujin laughed briefly, as if scoffing, and stroked Yiseo’s head. The strong grip on her head felt like it would shatter at any moment.

Ptooey, Yiseo spat.

“How could you do this to me!”

Tae Mujin laughed with Yiseo’s spit on his cheek. He smiled brightly, his scar sinking like a dimple, then ran his palm down his cheek. And then he licked the spittle-covered palm with a long swipe of his tongue. Goosebumps ran through her body from the beastly sight.

“You know what’s funny? Even after all that, the women here still come back, stubbornly. Stupidly. Whether they’re addicted to pain or not, it wasn’t my business. Yoon Yiseo, should I make you like that too?”

Tae Mujin chuckled and then bit Yiseo’s neck.

“Ah!!”

“If I screw you hard enough so you can’t walk, you won’t run away for a few days, right?”

The suction was so strong she thought her neck was being bitten off. Yiseo thrashed, pushing Tae Mujin away. He easily overpowered her and put his hand inside the knit she was wearing. He wildly rummaged inside the knit, as if to brand who was dominant.

“You bad ba, you son of a bitch, ugh... to me, to, to me, how could you... sniffle.”

While she sobbed like she was hiccuping, his hand, which had entered her bra, firmly gripped her breast. Yiseo’s body trembled at the crushing pressure.

At that moment, her eyes met Tae Mujin’s.

Strangely, Tae Mujin looked sad. Not Yiseo, who was being cruelly pressed down by his power, but Tae Mujin. In Yiseo’s tear-filled vision, Tae Mujin wavered like a ripple.

Tae Mujin stopped his rough movements. He took his hand out of her knit and stroked Yiseo’s head. He also withdrew his hard core, which had been grinding against her thigh. “Yiseo,” he called, as if comforting her.

“You bad bastard, you’re a son of a bitch, you crazy lunatic! You piece of trash!”

“Yes. Everything you say is right.”

While crying in Tae Mujin’s arms, Yiseo spewed all sorts of curses. Tae Mujin hugged Yiseo tightly as she screamed and cried for him to get away from her.

She felt betrayed by his sudden change, but more than that, she poured out all the anxiety that had accumulated since coming to Seoryeong, and the shock, sadness, and anger of it becoming reality, onto him. And Tae Mujin accepted everything Yiseo spewed out.

________________________________________

Tae Mujin covered the sleeping Yiseo with a blanket and left the house. He felt like he would go crazy if he stayed with her.

In the dark alley, where there were no streetlights, he lit a cigarette. Looking at the white smoke he exhaled into the air, he recalled her face wrinkling, saying his kiss smelled of cigarettes. A dry laugh escaped him. He knew very well that Yoon Yiseo despised everything about this place, including him. He realized it anew when he saw her being embraced by a man who seemed to belong in the sunlight.

He had intended to cut it off there. But when he saw her sitting on the street, crying, no other thought came to mind. Desire surged again. He had tried to take her no matter what.

He had intended to grab her soft breast and just embrace her. He had seen how to break women his whole life and knew it well. But Yiseo’s heart was pounding madly. The heart beneath her breast screamed, pounding against Tae Mujin’s palm. Thump, thump, thump, a small bird fluttered in his palm, as if it would shatter. At that moment, his lust, on the verge of exploding, subsided, leaving only the desire to soothe that small bird.

Phew, Tae Mujin exhaled a long stream of smoke. As he finished an entire pack, the blue dawn was approaching.