2019.12.20

December 20, 2019

No Mote For You!

Oh well, like I said before I wasn't going get angry about it and I'm not. Sometimes I feel I am not contributing as much as I could to the cause anyway. It is better that one of the more active people get it. I'll just do what I can. Cygin has been important to the cause and he can make better use of it. Pestilence was slated for me? I don't see myself as particularly Pesty, Pesto yes, Pesty no. I wanted to be Famine anyway. He was the one with the black horse and cool weighing scales. (Hmm... someone from the business community to carry the Famine mote...) Pestilence also runs against my Hippocratic Oath, which unfortunately I seemed to have violated repeatedly. Hmm... need to think my way out of that one. Anyhoo, That is neither here nor there. I will simply do what I can for the cause. If the Atlanteans want to act all superior and judge me they can. It doesn't bother me, it is their way.

What else shall I discuss in this entry? Well, I probably should write down my theory on My Lady and Janus for Posterity's sake. I was surprised that they actually listened to me on this. It is a shame that I wasn't able to explain it all in calm and detailed manner. OK, well first off, if I am right then maybe (and it is a big maybe) I owe Janus a big apology for castigating him in a previous entry. However, as my mind is still Swiss cheese then I shall refrain from any judgment on him. The trouble is that everyone judges the denizens of Arcadia by human moral standards. Yes, I do hold them as valid since I still do cherish my own humanity. Being a Changeling is not totally a curse. The birthing process is a bitch, but I don't mind it so much now that I've survived it... and for some reason am enjoying a measure of protection.

OK, this is the whole theory. I may actually get a chance to present it. However, if I die, well here it is. So it starts with my entering Arcadia and my escape. I don't know all the details, I am half expecting to find a DVD with a recording of myself telling me to get my ass to Arcadia. (Olivia Newton-John has such a lovely voice... but no way in Hell am I going to channel her at the ball. Ohm gets enough crap on that front.) So there I am - a simple fey in the big city. For some reason that only Lady Abigail (PBUHN) knows, she chooses me. Now, for some other reason which escapes me, My Lady sees me as important enough to come after personally. She calls the Hunt after me and even chooses the Dreamwalker as her Champion after I invoke the Right of Challenge. Luckily for me the fix was already in. Dreamwalker takes his fall and I have my tormentrix at my mercy. I make the very unpopular decision of sparing her life, but I do it conditionally. I did it with her own salvation in mind. I wanted to save her soul. So, I offer her the contract (technically it is Pledge, but I don't want to get everyone confused on the vernacular).

Well, this news gets back to Arcadia and Oberon's Court which is what My Lady was banking on. She knew that Oberon would never allow a slave to hold one of the Gentry (and a powerful one at that) under contract. This was totally a violation of just how things were supposed to work. However, and more importantly, he learns that some power outside of Arcadia has depowered a True Fay. Truly, bad tidings to be had by the Court. So he sends Janus out to investigate with extreme prejudice. One of Janus' tasks was to take me out and free My Lady from her contract. So he suppresses my Wyrd and knocks me for a serious loop. His investigation turns up some rather disturbing news so he orders My Lady to lie low, listen and play nice with the Autumn Court which she does.

This is where it gets a little odd. Somewhere the decision is made to re-power me and to keep it covert. So My Lady and Janus bounce me around like a pinball to do what they need to do. I surmise that Oberon learned of Donovan's plan. A world of zombies and death is not very beneficial to Arcadia and the Fay who feed on human emotion and use humans as slaves. This is bad news indeed. Now instead of allying with the Powers of Light out in the open. He decides that he is going to double-cross Donovan. There may be some neutrality / non-aggression pact angle playing into this. To do that, he needs someone on the inside, i.e. Janus. So Janus borrows Danno's power and joins with Samuel. As for me getting my powers back I am guessing that a sacrifice was needed. My powers may not only have been suppressed, but totally severed. I am hoping that in this scenario Telluviel willingly sacrificed herself to help me. I still feel horrible about what I did to her. So I kill Telluviel and get my powers back.

Janus could have killed me so many times and didn't. We did attack him in that battle. My Lady is much the same. She could have killed me, cut her losses and returned to Arcadia any time she wanted to do so. However, the illusion of needing the Court for protection served her purpose well.

Now, the whole Phoenix Gate thing. Yeah, that was probably hers and yeah she probably does want it back from Janus. I think that there may be no love lost between them, My Lady being what she is and Janus what he is (Unseelie and Seelie, maybe or something to that extent).

It truly was the Karthac that got me thinking. He showed nobility and allowed me to retrieve the body of Telluviel. Why would a bloodthirsty bug like him allow me to do that? That is the act of an honorable being and an honorable being would not willingly join in a pledge with someone who is dishonorable, ergo, Janus must be honorable. Plus, the Karthac is a high level creature. A being with whom some serious status is needed to bond. When I spoke with Janus he expected me to recognize him and was surprised to learn that I did not recall much of anything. I tried to play it cool, but I know that he knew that I knew nothing. Plus, why in the Hell would Janus give me my powers back in the first place? It didn't make any sense to me back then, but back then I would have jumped at anything to get them back, well, not anything. I remained powerless when I could have had them back for a simple betrayal. I was not willing to do that. I am thinking that Janus must be the equivalent of Oberon's Sherriff. The name Janus is tinged with quite a bit of Roman mythology in itself. A fitting name for one of such status.

I just hope that if this true that I didn't blow it for Janus by revealing all this to the group. I truly was not ready to reveal all this without checking with Janus first. However, they got under my skin for their repeated accusations against My Lady and me and the recent decisions I made. I wanted to end it all. Well, I hope that this measure of trust which I am showing them doesn't fall on deaf ears. I hope that they all have the tactical sense to keep their mouths shut on all this. If Janus truly is on our side then we can't make it obvious.

Ah well... Anyway, it is nice to see the others finally getting into the Christmas Spirit. I have been gathering my gifts. I truly can't wait for the ball. I have been planning my performance for weeks now. I even felt the need to tweak up my own appearance a bit. Yes, I am going to floor them all!! It shall be magnificent! This is all such a rush!! Damn, who is that looking back in the mirror. Yeah, that's you and what a Striking you, you are. I like the new me. Thomas has always been a part of The Padre and The Padre shall always remain a part of Thomas. Thomas needed to be freed to do what needs to be done.