Chapter 8

But no matter what, I still didn't believe that Yan Yang was pure-heartedly treating me the way he did. Although I wasn't sure why he was pretending to be nice to me, not being able to find a reason for it didn't mean I could trust him.

It was just like how he thought I was spoiling and doting on him without any hidden intentions, but the reality was that I was using him to scheme and get what I wanted.

I had never been genuine to him before.

He had just started middle school, while I started high school.

The high school was a bit further from the middle school; in fact, it was on a separate campus. Yan Yang, in his middle school uniform, could no longer come in to look for me.

On top of that, we now started school at a completely different time. Every day, I left the house half an hour earlier than him, and was only dismissed at eight in the evening.

My dad wanted to have Yan Yang leave the house a bit earlier in the morning so he could go to school with me, then at night, my dad would pick him up while I would call a cab or take public transport back home.

Yan Yang ran over and asked me, "Ge, I want to learn how to ride a bike. Do you know how to ride one?"

Just because of that one line of his, my dad bought two bicycles for us. Two bicycles that were exactly the same.

During the last week of the holidays, I taught Yan Yang how to ride a bicycle in the neighbourhood.

In this respect, he was rather dumb. His sense of balance wasn't good, so I had to keep supporting him in order for him to be able to cycle out ten or so metres. But the moment I let go, he would immediately cry out as he halted his bike.

The first time Yan Yang fell down was because of me. I told him not to worry and cycle forward; I would be behind supporting the back seat to help him maintain balance.

I had thought that it was only because of fear that he still couldn't pick it up after so long. Unexpectedly, he really couldn't do it. The moment I let go, his hands gripping the handles started to shake, then went from shaking to flailing, and the result was that before I could hurry over in time he had already fallen on the ground, the bicycle atop his body.

Yan Yang's fall probably hurt quite a bit. He was wearing casual shorts that only went down to the knee. When I went over, I realised that his shin was wounded and bleeding.

At the time, I was quite afraid. Not that he was in pain, but that my dad or his mum would blame me.

He looked at his leg, his brows knitted. Droplets of perspiration trickled down from his temples to his cheeks flushed red in pain.

I helped him lift up the bicycle and lock it at the side before bringing him to the clinic at the entrance of this area.

I piggy-backed him there because he said he was in so much pain he couldn't walk.

I felt like Yan Yang was just shamelessly being lazy. It was just a minor injury, and yet he couldn't walk anymore?

But to avoid him talking bad about me to the grown-ups, I could only act like a Gege who was feeling sorry for his Didi and carry him to the clinic.

Yan Yang was still very skinny. At the time, he was thirteen years old. It was the same age I had been when I first joined this household, but he was shorter than I had been, and very light.

His arms were draped over my shoulders, swaying back and forth. Wrapped around his wrist was a red string. There was one on my wrist too – they were from his maternal grandmother, who had gone to the temple to obtain them. Supposedly, they would help us avoid disaster and repel evil spirits. I didn't believe in these things, but I had to be obedient.

Yan Yang had his wound treated at the clinic. We sat there, waiting for his mum to come foot the bill and bring us home.

When his mum came, I had already mentally prepared myself to be scolded. But in the end, nobody scolded me or blamed me.

Yan Yang sighed, "I'm too dumb. I think it's better if I just stop learning."

Later on, Yan Yang's bicycle was sold by my dad. In the mornings, Yan Yang continued to take my dad's car to school, but occasionally he would get up extra early and insist that I send him to school.

In the evenings, my dad would pick him up, but sometimes he would also go home on his own.

During that time, my grades were already not bad. For the high school entrance exam[1], I placed in the top ten of the cohort. Yan Yang's grades, on the other hand, weren't good. Whenever we studied together, near the end, he would fall asleep on the desk or simply get into bed.

I couldn't be bothered with him. In fact, the worse his studies were, the happier I was, because in public, others would all say how Gege's grades were good, in praise and envy alike.

However, although he didn't enjoy studying, he wasn't a disobedient child either. He was always sticking to the rules.

Thirteen-year-old Yan Yang was still untainted and pretty. In a crowd of uniformed middle school students, one could spot him instantly.

He was too fair and too good-looking. He really couldn't not attract the attention of others.

Starting from when Yan Yang and I no longer shared the same school campus, we rarely saw each other during school hours anymore. One day, when I reached school, I unexpectedly found Yan Yang's pouch in my bag.

He had bought this pouch for himself. There was once we went to the zoo and he saw animal-shaped pouches selling for ten yuan each. Thus, he used his pocket money to buy two. One was for himself, and the other was naturally for me.

At that moment, I obviously had to show that I liked it a lot, but in reality I thought he was childish, and the pouch was childish too. I never once used it and had thrown it into a random drawer, but Yan Yang brought it with him every day.

His money was all inside the pouch. Without money, he wouldn't be able to eat in the afternoon. 

My last lesson of the morning ended ten minutes later than his. After I was dismissed, I rushed over to the middle school area.

When I got there, there were already barely any people at the main entrance as everyone had gone off to eat, but I managed to spot Yan Yang. His back was up against the wall of a small road on the other side of the school entrance and two boys in uniform were blocking his way.

Anyone would know what school bullies and bullying in school looked like.

With just a glance, I could tell that those two were bullying Yan Yang. However, Yan Yang was simply leaning against the wall with a look of indifference.

Yan Yang's behaviour surprised me. He didn't say anything, didn't struggle, just quietly stood there leaning against the wall, neither submitting nor asserting.

I suddenly realised that Yan Yang wasn't actually someone who would try to please everyone. It was only with me that he tried to curry so much favour.

I wasn't very far away from them, but there was a stop sign blocking me so Yan Yang didn't notice me.

I stood there and watched them for a while. I originally didn't want to get involved, but when one of them grabbed Yan Yang's collar, I cursed and walked over briskly.

Yan Yang probably hadn't expected me to be there. In a flash, his expression changed in pleasant surprise like a rabbit who had just spotted a carrot.

I pulled Yan Yang behind me, completely hiding his short and skinny frame.

People always bullied the weak but feared the strong. Those two boys simply exchanged a glance before leaving, not giving me the chance to fight.

Yan Yang happily held onto my wrist and asked me why I had come. I tossed that childish pouch to him and put my arm around his shoulder as I brought him to go eat lunch.

That was the first time I realised that I didn't want to see him mistreated. No matter what, he was my Didi. I could scheme against him, but others shouldn't even think of it.

It was also after that day that Yan Yang seemed to treat me even better, to the point where he would do anything I asked of him. A lot of his secrets, he told only to me.

For instance, he had received a love letter from a girl.

For instance, he had had a wet dream.

Footnotes:

[1] ‘High school entrance exam’: Final exam of middle school for enrolment into high school