Chapter 25

After becoming sexually involved with Yan Yang, for a very long time, I felt consumed by guilt.

He remained sick for more than half a month, his fever refusing to go down. Even though medicine was applied at that area every day, its recovery was still very sluggish.

He remained sick throughout the Spring Festival.

However, neither of us ever spoke about him being ill. Yan Yang's mum just felt that Yan Yang had become quieter as of late. Sometimes, she would worriedly ask him if everything was alright, and Yan Yang would simply reply that classes were difficult and he was struggling with the material.

His mum was always asking me to tutor him, and so was my dad. Even though I hadn't done as well as I could have for the entrance exams, in the eyes of everyone, I was still that person who had excellent grades.

I didn't want to tutor him, and he didn't want to study at all either.

During those days, whenever it was just the two of us, Yan Yang would snuggle up against me. I even suspected that he might have some other issues besides his fever, like a skinship-craving illness or a sex addiction.

I knew it wasn't very appropriate of me to think of him in this way, but he clearly couldn't do anything with me during this period of time, yet he would always wriggle his way into my bed and have me hug him as we slept.

He couldn't do it with me, yet he'd always try to tease me. After fanning the flames, he would then shoot me a wicked smile before rolling over to sleep, his ass up against my crotch.

Yan Yang was rather scheming when it came to such things.

I would sometimes overhear the two adults at home arguing. Since we had lived together for so many years, I did have some basic understanding of Yan Yang's mother's temper. Really, she had a good temper, and a good personality too. All these years, she had never once treated me poorly. In fact, she was far better to me than Yan Yang's father was. 

Considering how much she had done as a stepmother, she deserved some grand prizes.

When I first came, I had hated her together with the rest of them. Later on, I heard that when she met Yan Yang's father, that man had already left my mother. I didn't know how true that was. At first, I had been unwilling to take it as true, but eventually, I began to hope it was.

I didn't know how a woman like her could like a guy like that. There was nothing particularly outstanding about him, nothing about him that was worth a person's love and sacrifice.

Because of this man, my mother had lost her life.

I actually hoped that Yan Yang's mother could have a better life.

On the eve of Chinese New Year, after our dinner, Yan Yang dragged me back to our bedroom. He didn't do anything; just hugged me and watched the fireworks outside.

He said, “Ge, it always feels to me that we're in a relationship.”

As he said that, the two people in the living room began to argue.

The argument was very heated. Yan Yang said, “Don't worry, they're fighting because of me.”

Because Yan Yang's grades were poor, his father wanted to send him overseas to study music. At first, his mother had been in agreement, but Yan Yang refused no matter what they said.

Yan Yang's mum had always been the type to let her children choose their own path in life. In her words, “The road you take in life is your own choice. Whether the future is good or bad, easy or difficult, you will shoulder it yourself. Besides, the decades of your life belong to nobody but you.”

She was easily reassured by Yan Yang and decided to let Yan Yang stay here to take part in the university entrance examinations.

I could pretty much guess why Yan Yang didn't want to go. It had to do with what was going on between us.

His father felt that his results would be too poor to attend a decent university and his whole life would be ruined as a result. His mother felt that a person's value could not be determined by a single examination.

Hence, the two of them would start arguments over Yan Yang's future every other day.

Yan Yang said, "Ge, how about we elope?"

When he said that, the fireworks outside were at their most magnificent, lighting up the whole sky.

The new year had arrived, but we hadn't got a new beginning. Everything was still the same.

I had other thoughts. I reached a hand into his pants and massaged his ass.

I asked him, “You want to be with me so badly, huh? You don’t even want such a good path as going overseas to study anymore?”

“I don't,” Yan Yang wrapped his arms around my neck and looked into my eyes. He started squirming in my arms because of my hands roaming about, “I've always been a bit useless. If I go overseas alone, I'll die.”

I fiercely pulled him into a tight embrace and, for the first time, took the initiative to kiss him.

Yan Yang went limp from my kiss. I carried him to the window sill and stood between his legs.

"Yan Yang," I said, "I just thought of a better idea."

"What?"

“About eloping,” I explained, “We can go overseas together. Then we'll be so far away from them that no one can bother about whatever we do.”

I took his hand and pressed my lips to the back of it, “We can tell people we're a couple, and it'll be okay.”

Yan Yang fixed his gaze on me for a long time before speaking, “Ge, are you really willing to go with me?”

“I can apply to do my postgraduate studies overseas,” I told him, “But there's just one problem.”

“What problem?”

“If I study overseas, the fees will be very high. I may have to discuss it with Dad first.”

“I'll talk to him,” Yan Yang hugged me as he said softly, “Ge, wherever you want to go, I'll tell him.”