EI for Young Adults: Discussion 16

Maintaining connection with people

Why do we want connection with people? How do we maintain that connection? What drives us to stay connected?

Connection with people may be based on different foundations and pursue various needs. It helps to expose yourself to the whole variety of connections and needs they fulfill. Here is a list made with the help of the participants:

Learning about a person.

This type of connection is useful with new people, to engage your curiosity, to learn about the person and their experiences. It helps to have this approach when making new friendships
Need: Learning, growth, enrichment of life, curiosity

Sharing yourself

This type of connection is helpful to understand yourself (some people need to talk through things happening to them to understand them better), to create a deeper bond based on vulnerability
Need: Understanding of yourself, clarity, sharing, attention

Doing things together

This type of connection is helpful to enjoy each other's company that's not rooted in conversations, to share experiences (not necessarily good ones, but something to remember later), to experience connection during these experiences

Need: Companionship, fun, participation, closeness, competition

Being with each other

This type of connection is helpful to experience each other's presence in the moment. This experience is not about WHAT you do, each of you may do your own things, but the awareness of shared space is something that you can appreciate.
Need: Love, intimacy, appreciation, companionship

Experiencing each other

This type of connection is helpful to expand beyond who you identify yourself with, by being in the space of another person you get to experience the world their way, you allow them to experience your world
Need: To hear and be heard, love, closeness, empathy, compassion, expansion, exploration

Creating together

This type of connection is helpful when you merge your ideas, play off each other and create something new together.
Need: Play, exploration, discovery, adventure

Food for thought:

Which are your most frequent types of connection? How can you expand your connections to introduce the types that are not part of your repertoire?