Back Then

By: Sajia Mowrin

She loved to laugh.

At her friends.

At her coworkers.

At strangers passing by.

She was a bully.

But she didn’t think of herself that way.

She was socializing. She was having fun.

This was how they did it.

…Right?

That was how they did it back then.

When they called her their friend.

When they came over to her house only to converse among themselves.

When they asked her for expensive gifts on their birthdays

and then ignored her when it was hers.

When they laughed at her face.

“That’s just what friends do.”

…Right.

She loved to cry.

At home.

Only at home.

Because if she cried

in front of her friends,

in front of her coworkers, or

in front of random strangers,

They would laugh at her.

Just like back then.

Back in grade school.