Sunday Family Humour 28th October Page 2

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

The Joys of Maturity

Thanks to Bill S.

God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune

to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

Now that I’m “older” (but refuse to grow up), here’s what I've discovered:

1. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran.

3. I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart.

4. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.

5. All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.

6. If all is not lost, where is it?

7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

8. Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant.

9. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few.

10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

12. It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.

13. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you’re in the bathroom.

14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees.

15. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess?

16. It’s not hard to meet expenses…they’re everywhere.

17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter.

I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I’m here after.

19. I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS TO YOU OR NOT!!!

20. Funny, I don’t remember being absent-minded.

Russian Inventions

Thanks to Cory A.

Walmart Car Show

Thanks to Tony H.

Ha!

Thanks to Tony H

No matter what your job, you should always try and make it interesting....

Beauty, Brilliance & Birds

Thanks to Paul S.

A Little Poem

Thanks to Ray M.

Another year has passed

And we're all a little older.

Last summer felt hotter

And winter seems much colder.

There was a time not long ago

When life was quite a blast.

Now I fully understand

About 'Living in the Past'

We used to go to weddings,

Football games and lunches.

Now we go to funeral homes

And after-funeral brunches.

We used to have hangovers,

From parties that were gay.

Now we suffer body aches

And while the night away.

We used to go out dining,

And couldn't get our fill.

Now we ask for doggie bags,

Come home and take a pill.

We used to often travel

To places near and far.

Now we get sore asses

From riding in the car.

We used to go to nightclubs

And drink a lot of booze.

Now we stay home at night

And watch the evening news.

That, my friend is how life is,

And now my tale is told.

So, enjoy each day and live it up...

Before you're too damned old!

Amazon Associates

Please order your Amazon and Kindle products through Sunday Family Humour,

and we will be credited with a percentage.

It makes no difference to you, you still deal through Amazon,

but it makes a HUGE difference to us.

You can order any Amazon product,

but here's the latest News from Amazon

to encourage you to find just what you need.

Kindle Accessories

See Kindle on Amazon

Today's Deals on Amazon

Laptops for 2012

Amazon Toys - Campfire Kids - Enjoy Outdoor Adventures Inside

Amazon Athlete - Essentials for Running, Cycling, Triathlon, Swimming

Amazon Tactical - Great Selection of Optics, Knives, Cases, Equipment

Hash House Harriers

The Hash House Harriers (abbreviated to HHH, H3, or referred to simply as Hashing)

is an international group of non-competitive running, social and drinking clubs,

whose organisation and mismanagement have existed for over 50 years.

harriermagazine.com

Visit relaxing Laos

Vientiane Hashes run every Saturday and Monday

and monthly bike hashes

If you liked this page, please click here,

thank you

See You Next Week

Page 1 Page 2