Sunday Family Humour 14th October Page 2

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

Abe and Esther

Thanks to Ray O'.

Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation to celebrate their 50th anniversary.

Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces:

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives!"

Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the island.

An hour later Abe turns to his wife and asks,

"Esther, did we pay our Visa and MasterCard bill yet?"

"No, sweetheart," she responds.

Abe, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, "Esther, did we pay our American Express card yet?"

"Oh, no! I'm sorry. I forgot to send the check," she says.

"One last thing Esther. Did you remember to send the installment cheque for Revenue Canada this month?" he asks.

"Oh, forgive me, Abe," begged Esther. "I didn't send that one, either."

Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years.

Esther pulls away and asks him, "What was that for?"

Abe answers, "They'll find us!"

Student Coke Commercial

Thanks to Ray O'.

Marriage or Relationship With a Significant Other

Thanks to Ray M.

If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never say it's not quite as good as his mother's

then get a dog.

If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour,

for as long and wherever you want ...

then get a dog.

If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn't care

about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies

...then get a dog.

If you want someone who is content to get on your bed just to

warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores

...then get a dog !

If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn't care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves

you unconditionally, perpetually ..

...then get a dog.

BUT, on the other hand, if you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair

all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness ....

...then get a cat!

You thought I was gonna say... marry a man, didn't you?

Send this to all the women you know to brighten their day.

Send this to all the men just to annoy them!

You...

.....have a GREAT Day!!!

Always be yourself because the people that matter don't mind, and the ones who mind, don't matter.

We don't stop laughing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop laughing. I was taught to respect my elders. It's just getting harder to find them.

Security Guard

Thanks to Ray M.

They have adopted this lion since he was a cub, fed him, took good care of him and look at the result!

Northern Lights Over Teepees

Thanks to Geoff D.

These are spectacular and the teepees are so

pretty in the dark but, check out that thermometer!

(NORTHERN LIGHTS, YELLOW KNIFE, CANADA )

BELOW IS A FIRE RAINBOW - THE RAREST OF ALL NATURALLY OCCURRING

ATMOSPHERIC PHENOMENA. THE PICTURE WAS CAPTURED

ON THE IDAHO, WASHINGTON BORDER. THE EVENT LASTED ABOUT 1

HOUR. CLOUDS HAVE TO BE CIRRUS, AT LEAST 20K FEET IN THE AIR, WITH

JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF ICE CRYSTALS AND THE SUN HAS TO HIT

THE CLOUDS AT PRECISELY 58 DEGREES.

Beautiful sight!

Sunset at the North Pole

This is one of the rarest pictures that you will ever see in your life when the moon was closest to the earth. The date the picture was taken Thursday, the 13th of March 2011

This is the sunset at the North Pole with the moon at its closest point,

a scene you will probably never get to see in person, so take a moment and enjoy And, you also see the sun below the moon, an amazing photo and not one easily duplicated.