Sunday Family Humour 11th November

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

When You Can't Stand the Election News Anymore.

Thanks to Paul S.
If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates - Jay Leno
 The problem with political jokes is they get elected - Henry Cate VII
We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office -Aesop
If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, 
there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven – Will Rogers
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river - Nikita Khrushchev
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it - Clarence Darrow
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics
and your opponents will do it for you - Author unknown
Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the
tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel - John Quinton
Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, 
by promising to protect each from the other - Oscar Ameringer Especially this year?
I offer my opponents a bargain: 
if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them - Adlai Stevenson, campaign speech, 1952
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country -
Tex Guinan
I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians - Charles de Gaulle
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks - Doug Larson
There ought to be one day -- just one -- when there is open season on senators - Will Rogers

Something Special from Australia

Thanks to David H.

It is not common for a Koala to bear twins, and regrettably in this instance

the Mum was struck and killed by a passing car.

Fortunately, the driver stopped, and took the mother to the local vet,

not knowing she was dead,

where it was discovered she had these twins in her pouch.

First photo: Tiny koala being fed with syringe … sooo tiny!

Followed by a pictorial chronology of their growth…


Australia Koalas 1


Australia Koalas 2


Australia Koalas 3


Australia Koalas 4


Australia Koalas 5


Australia Koalas 6


Australia Koalas 7


Australia Koalas 8


Australia Koalas 9


Australia Koalas 10


Australia Koalas 11


Springtime in tulip country

Thanks to Lee


Springtime in tulip country.ppt



French Strip Tease as you have never seen before

Thanks to Paul S.

Striptease



Humour Time

Thanks to Paul S.

 
Humour Time 1
  
Humour Time 2

 
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Humour Time 13

  

Humour Time 12

 
Humour Time 16

  
Humour Time 15

 
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Humour Time 21
  

Humour Time 22

   
Humour Time 11

Humour Time 14



Shed

Thanks to Tony H.


Shed.ppt




Let's ALL stay healthy this winter

Thanks to Ray M.


Let's ALL stay healthy this winter

   
Healthy 1

* * How To Avoid The Flu.* * *

Healthy 2


Eat right!

Healthy 3a
Healthy 3b
Healthy 3
Healthy 3d

Make sure you get your daily dose of fruits and veggies.


Healthy 4
Take your vitamins and bump up your vitamin C,
and vitamin D.



Healthy 5
Get plenty of exercise because exercise
helps build your immune system.



Healthy 6
Walk for at least an hour a day..



Healthy 7
Go for a swim..
Healthy 8


Healthy 7a
Take the stairs instead of the elevator, etc.





Wash your hands often.
If you can't wash them,
Keep a bottle of antibacterial stuff around.



Healthy 8a

Healthy 8
Healthy 8a
Healthy 8a

Get lots of fresh air.
Open doors & windows whenever possible.



Healthy 9
Try to eliminate as much stress from your life as you can.



Healthy 10
Get plenty of rest.
OR!

 healthy 11

Take the doctor's approach..
Think about it...
When you go for a flu shot,what do they do first?  
 They Clean your arm with alcohol...

Why ???

Because Alcohol KILLS GERMS..
So......
 healthy 12


I walk to the liquor store. (exercise)
I put lime in my lager ...(fruit)
Celery in my Bloody Mary (veggies)
Drink outdoors on the bar patio..(fresh air)
Tell jokes, laugh....(eliminate stress)
Then pass out. (rest)
The way I see it...
 healthy 13
 healthy 14
 healthy 15


If you keep your alcohol levels up

Flu germs
 healthy 16
 healthy 17
can't get you!

 healthy 18


My grandmother always said...
'A shot in the glass
Is better than one in the ass!'


Live Well and Laugh Often !  
 

Now wasn't that GOOD advice?




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