Sunday Family Humour 21st October

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

Marriage and Divorce in Heaven

Thanks to Tony H.

On their way to get married, a young Catholic couple were involved in a fatal car accident.

The couple found themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven.

While waiting they began to wonder; Could they possibly get married in Heaven?

When St. Peter arrived they asked him if they could get married in Heaven.

St. Peter said, "I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out," and he left.

The couple sat and waited for an answer... For a couple of months.

While they waited, they discussed the pros and cons.

If they were allowed to get married in Heaven, should they get married, what with the eternal aspect of it all?

"What if it doesn't work?

Are we stuck in Heaven together forever?"

Another month passed.

St. Peter finally returned, looking somewhat bedraggled.

"Yes," he informed the couple, "You can get married in Heaven."

"Great!" said the couple.

"But we were wondering; what if things don't work out?

Could we get a divorce in Heaven?"

St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slammed his clipboard on the ground.

"What's wrong?" asked the frightened couple.

"OH, COME ON!" St. Peter shouted.

"It took me 3 months to find a priest up here!

Do you have ANY idea of how long it'll take to find a lawyer?"

Heaven On Earth

Thanks to Paul S,

Cute Cartoons

Thanks to Ray M.

Paramotor Sky Racers - Parabatix

Thanks to Fritz S.

Every cat should have its own dog

Thanks to Cindy

Alaska

Thanks to Lee

TUNNEL REVEALED AFTER 67 YEARS

THE GREAT ESCAPE

Thanks to Chris A.

Untouched for almost seven decades, the tunnel used in the Great Escape has finally been unearthed.

The 111-yard passage nicknamed Harry by Allied prisoners was sealed by the Germans after the audacious break-out from the POW camp Stalag Luft III in western Poland ..

Despite huge interest in the subject, encouraged by the film starring Steve McQueen, the tunnel remained undisturbed over the decades because it was behind the Iron Curtain and the Soviet authorities had no interest in its significance.

Unearthed: The entrance to the tunnel, which lay untouched for almost seven decades

But at last British archaeologists have excavated it, and discovered its remarkable secrets.

Many of the bed boards which had been joined together to stop it collapsing were still in position. And the ventilation shaft, ingeniously crafted from used powdered milk containers known as Klim Tins, remained in working order. Scattered throughout the tunnel, which is 30ft below ground, were bits of old metal buckets, hammers and crowbars which were used to hollow out the route.

A total of 600 prisoners worked on three tunnels at the same time. They were nicknamed Tom, Dick and Harry and were just 2ft square for most of their length.

It was on the night of March 24 and 25, 1944, that 76 Allied airmen escaped through Harry. Barely a third of the 200 prisoners many in fake German uniforms and civilian outfits and carrying false identity papers who were meant to slip away managed to leave before the alarm was raised when escapee number 77 was spotted.

Tunnel vision: A tunnel reconstruction showing the trolley system, tried out, below, by Frank, 89

Bitter-sweet memories: Gordie King, 91, made an emotional return to Stalag Luft III

Only three made it back to Britain. Another 50 were executed by firing squad on the orders of Adolf Hitler,

who was furious after learning of the breach of security.

In all, 90 boards from bunk beds, 62 tables, 34 chairs and 76 benches, as well as thousands of items including knives, spoons, forks, towels and blankets, were squirrelled away by the Allied prisoners to aid the escape

plan under the noses of their captors.

Although the movie might suggest otherwise, no Americans were involved in the actual operation. Most were British and the others were from countries including Canada, Poland and Australia .

Discoveries: The site of the tunnel, recently excavated by British archaeologists

War classic: Steve McQueen on the set of the classic movie, The Great Escape

The latest dig, over three weeks in August, located the entrance to Harry, which was originally concealed

under a stove in Hut 104. The team also found another tunnel, called George, whose exact position had not been charted. It was never used as the 2,000 prisoners were forced to march to other camps as the Red Army approached in January 1945. Watching the excavation was Gordie King, 91, an RAF radio operator, who was 140th in line to use Harry and therefore missed out. This brings back such bitter-sweet memories,he said as

he wiped away tears. Im amazed by what they've found.

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