Sunday Family Humour 5th August Page 2

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

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SCHOOL - 1957 vs. 2010

Thanks to Franz R.

Scenario :

Johnny and Mark get into a fight after school.

1957 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.

2010 - Police called, and they arrest Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it. Both children go to anger management programmes for 3 months. School governors hold meeting to implement bullying prevention programmes.

Scenario :

Robbie won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

1957 - Robbie sent to the office and given six of the best by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2010 - Robbie given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADHD – result deemed to be positive. Robbie's parents get fortnightly disability payments and school gets extra funding from government because Robbie has a disability.

Scenario :

Billy breaks a window in his neighbour's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1957 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2010 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care; joins a gang; ends up in jail.

Scenario :

Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

1957 - Mark gets glass of water from Principal to take aspirin with. Passes exams, becomes a solicitor.

2010 - Police called, car searched for drugs and weapons. Mark expelled from school for drug taking. Ends up as a drop out.

Scenario :

Johnny takes apart leftover fireworks from Guy Fawkes night,puts them in a paint tin & blows up a wasp's nest.

1957 - Wasps die.

2010- Police & Anti-Terrorism Squad called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, investigate parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated. Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly in an airplane again.

Scenario :

Johnny falls over while running during morning break and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. She hugs him to comfort him.

1957 - In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing footie. No damage done.

2010 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy and ends up gay.