Sunday Family Humour 20th May Page 2
Sunday Family Humour 20th May Page 2
Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons humour for all the family
Two Old Footballers
Thanks to Tony H.
Two 80 year old men, Mike and Joe, have been friends all of their lives.
When it's clear that Joe is dying, Mike visits him every day.
One day Mike says, "Joe, we both loved football all our
lives, and we played football on Sundays together for so many years.
Please do me one favour, when you get to Heaven,
somehow you must let me know if there's football there."
Joe looks up at Mike from his death bed,
" Mike, you've been my best friend for many years.
If it's at all possible, I'll do this favour for you.
Shortly after that, Joe passes on.
At midnight a couple of nights later,
Mike is awakened from a sound sleep by a blinding flash of white light
and a voice calling out to him, "Mike--Mike."
"Who is it? Asks Mike sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?"
"Mike--it's me, Joe."
"You're not Joe. Joe just died."
"I'm telling you, it's me, Joe," insists the voice."
"Joe! Where are you?"
"In heaven", replies Joe..
"I have some really good news and a little bad news."
"Tell me the good news first ," says Mike.
"The good news," Joe says,
"is that there's football in heaven.
Better yet, all of our old friends who died before us are here, too.
Better than that, we're all young again.
Better still, it's always spring time and it never rains or snows.
And best of all, we can play football all we want, and we never get tired."
That's fantastic," says Mike.
"It's beyond my wildest dreams! So what's the bad news?
"You're in the team for this Saturday."
Spain
Thanks to Lee
Humming Birds
Thanks to Ray M.
This woman lives in a Hummingbird fly zone.
As they migrated, about 20 of them were in her yard.
She took the little red dish, filled it with sugar water and this is the result.
The woman is Abagail Alfano of Pine, Louisiana -
she had been studying them daily and one morning put the cup from the feeder (with water in it) into her hand.
Since they had gotten used to her standing by the feeder they came over to her hand.
She says in touching they are as light as a feather.
These pictures are amazing.
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Can Your Ipad Do This
Thanks to Tony H.
The World' Largest Flower
Thanks to Lee
Roads
Thanks to Ray M.
Spread the Stupidity
Thanks to Tony H.
Only in North America
.......
do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Canada .....do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
Only in Canada .....do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Canada .......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
Only in Canada ...........do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight...
(I love this one)
Only in Canada .....do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
EVER WONDER ...
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
(yes I do wonder about this...a lot)
Why can'tWomen put on mascara with their mouth closed?
(this has baffled me forever)
I LIKE THIS ONE!!!
Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Yah....WHY WHY WHY!!!!!
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes?
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
Hey...really?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
I like this one!!!
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and forward Sunday Family Humour to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle)...in other words, send it to everyone. We all need to smile every once in a while.
Hash House Harriers
A fun way to step out of the box.
The Hash House Harriers (abbreviated to HHH, H3, or referred to simply as Hashing)
is an international group of non-competitive running, social and drinking clubs,
whose organisation and mismanagement have existed for over 50 years.
Visit relaxing Laos
Vientiane Hashes run every Saturday and Monday
and monthly bike hashes
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