Disney's Cruella

by Earl and Joey

As of right now, Disney is obsessed with two things: spinoffs and live action reboots. Today, we’re going to be talking about the latter. Actually, we’re going to be talking about a mix of the two. A live action reboot-spinoff hybrid. Now, I know what you’re probably thinking: how in the history of mankind did such a monstrosity come to be? Well my friends, I’ll tell you…

We all know the classic Disney hit 101 Dalmatians, whether you watched the original animated version or the live action version. It’s a pretty good story for kids and adults alike. Now, from the makers of that masterpiece, comes a nightmare. Cruella. The new Disney “prequel” to 101 Dalmations. Coming out in May 2021 (PLEASE NOTE: This article was written in early May, and the newspaper might come out after Cruella’s release date.) So apparently, this movie is about the life story of Cruella De Vil, the main antagonist of 101 Dalmatians, and how she’s an outcast of society.

Please, Disney. Don’t pull a Maleficent on us, and make the woman who literally wanted to skin puppies into a misunderstood hero. Her name is literally “cruel devil”. Stop trying to give these villains redeemable qualities. Let villains be villains. Don’t try to make everyone seem good. That’s exactly what ruins the movie for us. When you try to make the villain seem good, it just ruins the awesome vibes we get from them.

Disney is obsessed with spinoffs. There’s no doubt about it. Think of all the new titles: Wandavision, Solo, Falcon and the Winter Soldier, and many more. There are too many to list. So my question here is: why? What is up with Disney and spinoffs? Sure, they’re nice once in a while, but when you make pointless spinoffs that nobody asked for, it gets REALLY annoying. I even heard something about a Lando Calrissian spinoff coming sometime soon. Anyway, I was getting off topic.

My main point why this new Cruella movie is gonna be trash is because they are trying to make her seem like the misunderstood hero, and give her redeemable qualities that make the watcher think “Really? That was her life’s story?” when in reality, the original producers of 101 Dalmatians meant for her to be just a villain, not a misunderstood outcast. Disney can put 0 quality into their films, and still have the critics in their pockets, because they’re a multibillion dollar company that, despite their seemingly infinite riches, focuses more on earning money than they on the actual quality of the movies they produce. They make everything seem really cool and well-produced by giving their trailers epic music and good VFX.

Well, I hope you’ve enjoyed our article. We’re probably gonna be starting a podcast soon, so more on that later. Thanks for reading!