Trauma
According to the American Psychological Association “Trauma is an emotional response to a terrible event like an accident, rape or natural disaster.” These events can happen once, over a period of time, or can be ongoing. Trauma can also be experienced vicariously through hearing about or witnessing a traumatic event occurring or happening to someone else.
Many people experience some form of a trauma in their lifetime such as the death of a loved one, childhood trauma, divorce, car accident, or vicarious trauma through hearing about natural disasters, wars, or violence.
Experiencing a trauma does not automatically mean that you will experience prolonged emotional, physical or cognitive effects. In general, a person can expect that immediately after a traumatic event they may experience some or all of the following:
Shock Denial Unpredictable Emotions Flashbacks Strains on Relationship
Lethargy Fatigue Panic Anxiety Depression
Guilt Shame Self Blame Physical Symptoms (headache, nausea)
Difficulty Focusing Difficulty making decisions Hyper-vigilance
It is not unheard of for many of these symptoms to last for up to 6 months after an event. Just because some one has experienced a traumatic event, this does not mean that they will have these difficulties forever, nor that they will automatically develop Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome (PTSD).
If Symptoms Continue
Do not isolate yourself. Surround yourself with supportive individuals. Isolative behavior can prolong symptoms and increase depression and anxiety.
Talk to someone. It can be a friend, family member, religious leader, doctor, or therapist.
Engage in self regulating activities. Simple deep breathing, stretching, and allowing yourself to feel any emotions that happen to surface without suppressing them.
Take good care of yourself. Get plenty of sleep, eat healthy, get some type of exercise (walk, yoga), prioritize obligations to reduce stress, and avoid using substances such as alcohol, marijuana, illicit drugs. Monitor caffeine intake, use of prescription medication, and use of nicotine.
Helping a Friend
The best thing to do for a friend who has experienced a traumatic event is to be present. You do not have to solve any problems or attempt to fix the situation. Ask your friend what they need. If they are not able to express any needs, simply be there. Listen, help them to get connected and stay connected to others, offer to stay with them, all in all, simply being a good friend is all you really need to do.
Vicarious Trauma
This is most often a term used to describe what can happen to helping professionals that hear about and work with people who have experienced trauma. It is possible for a friend or loved one to also experience similar symptoms if they are hearing the details of what occurred along with witnessing the effects of the traumatic event on their loved one.
The signs of vicarious trauma are similar to that of first hand trauma, only the person experiencing vicarious trauma may not connect their symptoms with the experience of their loved one. When we care about someone we want to be there and provide for them everything we can. As a result we may ignore some of our own needs and signs that we need to take care of ourselves. Some of the signs of vicarious trauma are:
Feeling agitated Experiencing Mood Swings Over or under eating Restless or Lack of Sleep Jittery
Intrusive Thoughts Feeling Helpless Exhaustion Decreased Motivation
If you are experiencing any of the above, it is important to take care of yourself. It may mean scheduling some time for yourself, talking with someone, or just being more aware and present of yourself and what you need and giving yourself permission to do what will be helpful for you.