Relationships

Life is full of all kinds of relationships and during your college years you will be sure to experience lots of new ones. This can be both stressful and exciting.

Part of any good relationship is good communication. Without being able to address difficulties as they come up, our stress levels increase and a strain is put on the relationship. Many times people try to just ignore the difficulties, find a way to stuff it down. This adds more stress on the individual who is struggling. Typically it is better to speak directly about the situation at hand. Keeping the focus on the behavior that is causing you distress and being open to discussing and coming up with options and compromises to make it through the difficulty. Below are some tips on Conflict Resolution.

Healthy Relationships Defined

Below information was adapted and taken from The National Domestic Violence Hotline:

http://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/healthy-relationships/

Healthy relationships allow both partners to feel supported and connected but still feel independent. COMMUNICATION and BOUNDARIES are the two major components of a healthy relationship. Ultimately, the two people in the relationship decide what is healthy for them and what is not. If something doesn't feel right, you should have the freedom to voice your concerns to your partner.

COMMUNICATION

Communication allows you and your partner to have a deep understanding of each other, and allows you to connect. In a healthy relationship with good communication, both partners:

Treat each other with respect
Speak openly to one another about thoughts and feelings
Feel heard when expressing feelings
Listen to each other and compromise
Do not criticize each other
Feel supported to do the things they like
Celebrate each other’s accomplishments and successes

BOUNDARIES

Each person should express to their partner what they are and are not comfortable with, when it comes to sex life, finances, family and friends, personal space and time. In a healthy relationship with boundaries, both partners:

Allow each other to spend time with friends and family
Do not abuse technology to check on a partner
Trust each other and not require their partner to “check in”
Do not pressure the other to do things that they don’t want to do
Do not constantly accuse the other of cheating or being unfaithful
What Is Consent?
Consent allows both partners to express what they do want to experience.
It can be a moment for both partners to openly express to each other what they’re looking for. The saying “yes means yes” can be empowering and useful in thinking about what consent is.

Articles about Relationships and Communication

Getting The Male Persepective: How Do Relationships Change In College - Taken from USA Today on-line. By Alexandra Samuels. The University of Texas at Austin, September 26, 2014 8:32 am.

What To Expect In Your First College Relationship (And How To Make It Work)- Taken from hercampus.com - By Allie Duncan in Relationships. Posted July 17, 2015 = 07:00 pm.

When The Attraction Isn't Mutual - From Huffington Post on-line. by Andrew Gelwicks, posted 11/30/2014 6:17 pm.

Roommate Relationships Explored - From Scholarships.com -

7 College Roommate Conflicts And Solutions - From mercurynews.com - by Jessica Yadegaran, posted 8/7/2013, 3:00 pm.

Communication Styles Can Affect Your Relationship - Taken from psychologytoday.com

Intimate Relationships and Sexual Activity

An insightful take on how we have grown up talking about sexual activity and a way we can shift the language and show more respect and mutuality.

Intimacy and Love, how to keep them growing.