Change - How to cope

This section will focus more on the stressful aspects of change and give you some ideas for coping, if the ways you are currently coping don't seem to be working anymore.  

It is not uncommon for anyone to feel like they are out of control when they are experiencing a change or several changes at once.  Even changes that we feel are positive can be stressful. 

Changes that can be stressful

Though much of the above can also feel exciting, it can also add stress and make us feel out of sorts.

What to do

Talk to people 

If you're feeling like you're spinning, talk to others about how you're feeling.  Chances are you are not alone and that information can often help calm us down. Talk to friends, family, clergy, a counselor, a teacher.  Just talk. Seek out supports in the area you're in. Support networks are resources we can not do without. 

Eat, Sleep, Drink Water, Exercise

Make sure that you continue to do the things that are important to your health.  

Eat right and try to avoid the typical foods of finals time, heavy, starchy comfort foods.  

Sleep is key.  If you're too tired from studying or worrying all night, you're mind won't be clear for your tests/projects/interviews/work.  

Drink water!  Seems small but important.

Exercise.  A great way to de-stress and unwind.  Exercise also helps with anxiety and depression.  30 minutes a day is all you need. 

Find out resources

What's in the area that you're interested in?  What's in the area that can offer support? Support can be given from anyone from a local church to friends, to teachers, to a local gym.  Check out what's available according to you're needs. 

Be flexible

Change is inevitable and so we need to try to be open to it.  Be open minded, see the big picture and be willing to look at other perspectives and possibilities. 

Don't avoid

If change is going to happen, change is going to happen.  The more we try to pretend that change isn't occurring, the more it does and the more out of control we can feel.  Lean into the change.  Look for the pieces that are positive.  See what can be learned.  Figure out ways to participate more in the changes instead of waiting for them to take place. 

For Test/Mid-Term/Finals Stress

Be sure to:

Manage your time

Try to avoid cramming.  Prioritize what you need to do.  What's going to be the toughest or most time consuming task?  What do you know for sure and what are you uncertain about?  Focus on the things that are more difficult or take up more time.  

Take breaks

It is easy to find yourself trying to push through a lack of focus or energy.  DON'T.  If you find that you can't focus or you're feeling tired, take a break.  Either get some sleep, or do something that is just for you.  Listen to music.  Go for a walk.  Visit a friend.  Workout.  Write, draw, create.  Do something silly. Something that allows you to relax.  

Activities and Actions to De-Stress

29 Life Saving Tips They Didn't Teach You At College Orientation - Found on Buzzfeed.com

10 Ways to De-Stress - Taken from kathrynvercillo.hubpages.com

50 Ways to De-Stress in College - Taken from about.com

Blissing out - Reduce Stress On The Spot - Taken from webmd.com

How Changes/Stress Affect us

Change happens all the time.  Just when we think we are getting in a groove of sorts, something interrupts the process.  We all have to deal with changes/transitions.  Some changes we make and some are made without our participation.  Some changes are seen as positive and others, negative.  Sometimes we don't even think of all the changes that we have experienced until suddenly we notice we are more tired, more moody, sad, anxious, stressed, excited or any other number of emotions.  

This section is about noticing how change/transition, affects us. No one person is the same, however we can have similar responses to change/transitions.  

Feelings we may observe

Excitement - Can feel like a nervous energy and is mostly thought of as positive.  Perhaps you notice you are distracted by thinking about the future and planning for it.  You might feel more energetic.  Need less sleep.  Have a feeling of butterflies in the stomach, etc. 

Tense - Head hurts, shoulders ache, notice that you're clenching your jaw.  You might feel a knot in your stomach or be more moody.  Things that used to not bother you, now seem to. 

Worried/Anxious - Your head can't feel clear.  Your constantly distracted by the worries about "what if."  You may feel nauseous.  You may notice rapid heart beat, more tension, or that you can't sit still.  Though this can be similar to excitement, this is typically seen as negative. 

Angry/Moody- You feel in general more agitated.  You react negatively to things more quickly that you may have otherwise not reacted to.  People say things to you like, "What's your problem?" or "You're acting like a...".  Your body may feel more tense.  Your face may feel more hot and you scowl more. 

Sad/Depressed - Feel overwhelmed and sad about things changing.  Feeling out of control and like you have no hope.  You may feel like crying or just being by yourself.  You're not as excited about things you once were.  You feel disconnected from others that seem to be "doing fine" or "look happy."  You may start procrastinating more, sleeping more, eating more or less. 

Overwhelmed - Just can't get yourself together.  You have grand plans to get things completed but you can't seem to get out of your own way.  You feel stuck, almost frozen.  Your ability to prioritize has left you and you can't seem to make a decision or follow through on anything.  You may notice more piles of things around you in your room or apartment.  You can't even bother to put things away.  

Motivated - There's nothing you can't do.  You're ready to be done and you know just how to accomplish it.  You've got high energy and feel clear and focused because you're about to reach the finish line.  You sleep well, you're happy and life seems pretty great.  You welcome the changes because you're looking forward to them. 

Mixture- This can be anything and everything.  The funny thing about changes and transitions is that we can feel all these things about them and sometimes all at the same time.  

How to use this information?  Be aware.  If you notice that you haven't quite felt like yourself lately, think about what is happening.  How many tests and projects are coming due?  Have you started packing, looking for somewhere to live, figuring out roommates, planning for life after school, looking for a job, etc, etc.  Notice how you are managing the stresses that you're experiencing.  This is the first step to being able to help yourself feel more on level ground.  Notice if you are only focused on one thing or many things.  Notice if you are eating, sleeping, drinking fluids, getting exercise, having time with friends, getting your work done.  When changes come our way we can get hyper focused on one thing and worry about it in detail.  If this is the case for you.  Stop.  Take a break.  Regroup. 

Helpful Articles

Ten Strategies for Dealing with Change - Taken from ezines.com.

Change - Taken from askmen.com.

Coping with Life Changes - Taken from my.clevelandclinic.org

Moving Back Home

Whether its just for the summer or you have to move back home after graduation for a while, moving from the freedom of college life to being back in your parents'/guardians' home can be stressful.  No matter what the situation though, it is still important to take care of yourself. Below are some things that you can experience when you need to be back home. 

-My house my rules- Though there are rules at school that must be followed, there is a bit more flexibility. You basically decide when you get up, if you go to class, what time you go to bed, if you stay in your room or somewhere else.  There is not a lot of answering to someone else.  That can be a difficult transition to make in going back home.  You had all this freedom and you may go back home and not have as much.  Be smart.  Talk to your parents and figure out a plan to handle some of these difficulties.  

- Old friends, different goals - Though catching up with old friends can be a great time, sometimes, after being away, we notice that some of our old friends don't seem to click with us anymore.  No one has done anything wrong, you may just notice that you and some of your friends have grown apart. This can feel a bit shocking and make you feel out of sorts.  It could cause the "being at home" experience to be less enjoyable.  Don't let it consume you.  Connect with those that still feel right.  Don't spend as much time with those that don't and keep in touch with friends from school. You may be surprised how many of them are experiencing the exact same feeling.  

- Working hard for the money- So many students have to pay most of their own way through school.  So summer is less about fun and more about earning money. Job seeking or getting started on your own, isn't always easy either.  Just remember, you still need to take care of yourself and you still need to have some fun.  Balance is the key.  If you need to work a lot, at least try to schedule some time in for other activities with family, friends, or by yourself.  All work and no play makes us cranky and tired. So take care of you and find balance where you can. 

- Ho hum, boredom- Sometimes we feel like there is NOTHING to do when we're home.  Maybe some of our friends aren't around anymore.  Maybe we work so much our schedules don't fit with other people's.  Maybe we just miss being at school.  No matter what the reason, again, it's important to realize that if you're bored, only YOU can change it.  Your work schedule doesn't match with friends'?  Find some thing to do on your own or plan to take a day off that works for all of you.  Try something new.  Read something.  Work on a project. Find a place to volunteer.  You'll meet more people and maybe make some new friends too.  The main thing is to realize you have more control over your boredom than you think. 

Articles about moving back home, having no home

10 Tips for Moving Back in with Your Parents After College -  Information about how to deal with living back at home after graduation.  Just in case. Taken from collegelife.about.com

The Number of Hungry and Homeless Students Rises Along with College Costs - Story from NPR. 

On College Campuses, Homelessness is a 'Hidden' Problem - from WBUR.org.