Sunday Family Humour 7th July

Jokes presentations, videos, pictures, cartoons - family humour

Your Groan For The Day

Thanks to David H.

How come you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish?

A guy fell into a lens grinding machine . . . and made a spectacle of himself.

To write with a broken pencil is . . . pointless.

When fish are in schools they sometimes . . . take debate.

A thief who stole a calendar . . . got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles . . . U.C.L.A.

The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes . . . was on shaky ground.

The batteries were given out . . . free of charge.

A dentist and a manicurist married . . . they fought tooth and nail.

A will is a . . . dead giveaway.

If you don't pay your exorcist . . . you can get repossessed.

With her marriage, she got a new name . . . and a dress.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you . . . A-flat miner.

You are stuck with your debt if . . . you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia . . . The LAN down under.

A boiled egg is . . . hard to beat.

When you've seen one shopping center . . . you've seen a mall.

Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was . . . resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? . . . He's all right now.

If you take a laptop computer for a run you could . . . jog your memory.

A bicycle can't stand alone . . . it is two tired.

In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism . . . it's your Count that votes.

When a clock is hungry . . . it goes back four seconds.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine . . . was fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory . . . which was never developed.

Those who get too big for their britches will be . . . exposed in the end.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair . . . she thought she'd dye.

Lego Town promo video does not go as planned

Clever Street Art

Thanks to David H.

street art

The Art of Rock Balancing

Thanks to David M.

Michael Grab is an artist that has been 'rock balancing' since 2008. Much of his recent work has been done around the Boulder, Colorado area. Grab finds the process both spiritual and therapeutic.

On his site gravityglue.com, Grab explains: "The most fundamental element of balancing in a physical sense is finding some kind of 'tripod' for the rock to stand on. Every rock is covered in a variety of tiny to large indentations that can act as a tripod for the rock to stand upright, or in most orientations you can think of with other rocks. By paying close attention to the feeling of the rocks, you will start to feel even the smallest clicks as the notches of the rocks in contact are moving over one another.

Parallel to the physical element of finding tripods, the most fundamental non-physical element is harder to explain through words. In a nutshell, I am referring to meditation, or finding a zero point or silence within yourself. Some balances can apply significant pressure on your mind and your patience. The challenge is overcoming any doubt that may arise."

On gravityglue you will find an extensive gallery of his work along with videos, an in-depth interview and an active blog about his thoughts that accompany his work.

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The Indian Blanket Auction

Thanks to Fritz

Egyptian Humour

Thanks to Ray M.

goha: I was born in Egypt.

Lebanese : 'Oh really, what part?'

goha:'All of me, you silly Lebanese!!.'

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A girl asked her Saaidi: boyfriend : 'Habibi, if we get engaged will you give me a ring?'

Sure replied the Saaidi:'What's your phone number?'

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goha is for the 1st time buying a colour TV.

goha: Do you have colour TVs?

Sailsman : Sure.

goha: Give me a green one.

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Q: Why did 18 Saaidis go to a movie together?

A: Because below 18 was not allowed !!!

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Q:goha ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it six or twelve pieces.

A: 'Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces.'

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What about the Saaidi's wife who gave birth to twins?

Her husband is out looking for the other man.

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goha: 'Excuse me sir, what time is it?'

MAN: 'It's 3:15.'

goha: (puzzled look on his face) 'You know, it's the weirdest thing, I have been asking that question all day, and each time get a different answer.'

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A Saaidi: was driving down the highway to Disneyland when he saw a sign that said 'DISNEYLAND LEFT'.

After thinking for a minute he said to himself 'oh well!' and turned around and returned home.

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A Saaidi: got himself a puzzle game.

It took him 10 hard months to finish it. He was so proud of himself because at the side of the box it said '2-3 years'!!!

Ships at the Bottom of The Dead Sea

Thanks to David H.

Have you ever wanted to walk across the bottom of the River, Lake or Ocean to see all the ships that have sunk? Well....

The Aral Sea was once the world's fourth-largest saline body of water.

It has been steadily shrinking since the 1960s, after the rivers that fed it were diverted by Soviet Union irrigation projects. And now it's almost gone leaving a desert full of old shipwrecks.

Really quite unreal isn't it,

you just saw the BOTTOM of the once fourth largest salt water sea in the world.

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